Three's a Crowd
by HaleyDewit
Summary: When Dean dies Cas makes a decision that will change his and Meg's lives forever...
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Everything Supernatural belongs to the CW.**

**Okay, so last week we had the finale of What Happened in Colorado. For those who haven't read it, here's a small recap:**

**After Cas was assumed killed by the leviathan Daphne Allen found him. She married him, but never treated him as her husband. Shortly after it was revealed that Daphne suffered from mental issues. **

**In the meantime a lot of people were being killed and somehow Cas was always suspected. He was even accused of pedophilia. **

**Later in turned out that the real killer was Zoey Allen, Daphne's sister, who was obsessed with Cas. When she realized Cas didn't love her back, she tried to kill him. Instead she shot Dean.**

**And now have fun with 'Three's a Crowd' **

**Chapter 1: Dead or Alive**

**Part 1**

Sam held the door of the hospital open, while Cas carried the unconscious Dean inside. Before they could call for help an emergency doctor rushed to them and called for a stretcher. A male nurse rode a stretcher to them and Cas lay Dean down on it. As the doctor drove to the emergency room, she asked what happened.

"He's been shot" Cas quickly answered.

"What's his blood type?" the doctor needed to know. Sam answered and the doctor drove the stretcher into the emergency room. "Sorry, you have to wait outside" she said as she closed the doors, leaving Sam and Cas outside.

Sam ran his fingers through his hair and sank down on the floor.

"This is all my fault" Cas said difficult.

Sam looked up, irritated. He really couldn't handle Cas' feelings of guilt.

"If I wouldn't have let the Leviathan in, I wouldn't have ended up in Colorado and then I would've never met Daphne and Zoey. Then Zoey wouldn't have fallen in love with me and Dean would still be okay" Cas said and he swallowed the crop in his throat. "It should've been me. I would've been fine"

"Look, it's not your fault" Sam snapped. "Can you try to be a little less fragile for a change?"

Cas nodded slowly, when the door of the emergency room opened and the doctor came outside. Her facial expression was telling enough.

"No" Sam said trembling.

"I'm sorry" she said soft and remorseful. "There's nothing we could do. He was dead the moment he was in the emergency room"

Sam pressed his lips and blinked. "Hmmm" he sighed difficult. "Can…Can I see him?" he asked.

"Of course" the doctor said.

Sam entered the room, but Cas turned around and walked away.

* * *

**Part 2**

It was close to midnight and Zoey had buried Daphne's body in the garden. She hadn't meant to shoot Dean Winchester, but if he was dead, all the better for her. The less people that were in her and Cas' way, the better.

Of course it would take Cas some time to forgive her, but their love would survive it. She hadn't want to kill her sister, either, but there simply was no other way. Zoey was certain that wherever Daphne was now, she would understand. Daphne was at piece. She was with Martin, the most important person in her life.

And Zoey would be with Cas and then they would raise Alexia together. It was perfect.

Zoey jumped up from her thoughts when someone banged the door. She got up from her chair and walked to the front door and opened it.

She gazed surprised in Cas' eyes, before she covered her mouth. Then she threw her arms around his neck. "I knew you'd come. I knew you'd the make the right call" she sobbed from happiness. She turned around and Cas followed her inside the kitchen.

"You want some coffee? Or maybe something stronger?" she offered.

"Dean is dead" Cas said numb.

"Something stronger it is" Zoey said and she pulled out two glasses and a bottle of Scotch. As she poured the glasses and handed one to Cas, she said: "I didn't mean to kill your friend, Cas. My parents can take care of the funeral. I promise you it will be beautiful"

Cas squeezed the glass until it shattered and blood dripped on the table.

"Oh my God, are you okay?" Zoey gasped and she took his hand. There was no cut. "You're healing quicker"

Cas grabbed Zoey's hand and looked up, fury burning in his eyes. "You killed Dean" he said with a voice so cold Zoey shivered. She tried to jerk her hand, but Cas tightened his grip.

"Cas, I know you're in pain, but let me go" Zoey said trembling. Cas looked into Zoey's eyes as his grip tightened even more. Zoey gasped and tears rolled over her face. "Please, stop. You're hurting me" she sobbed. She screamed when she felt the bones in her hand break.

Cas grabbed her hair and pulled her to the mirror. Zoey looked down, but Cas jerked her hair and forced her to look up.

"Look how cute we look together" he snapped. Zoey mumbled something in fear. "What did you say? You want a closer look? Your wish is my command" He smashed Zoey's face into the mirror and dropped her on the ground. She crawled away, trying to reach the back door, when Cas grabbed her feet and dragged her back inside and turned her on her back.

He kneeled next to her and forced his fist into her stomach. Zoey gasped and blood spilled from her mouth. "See how you like it" Cas said trembling. He removed his bloodstained hand and bent over to her face. "That's for all the crap you did to me" He grabbed Zoey's neck and snapped it. "And that's for killing my best friend"

He dropped the head, which landed hard on the floor, and stood up. He wanted to leave, when he heard a door close.

* * *

**Part 3**

Sam was sitting beside Dean's death bed, when the door opened and Ellen walked in. Sam was lost in grief, so he didn't hear her. It wasn't until she lay her hand on his shoulder that he looked up.

"Ellen?" he said confused. He hadn't thought about calling anyone, so why was she here? "Did Cas call you?" he asked, though he knew that couldn't be the case.

"No" Ellen said numb. "I had to be here" Then, with a little more strength in her voice, she said: "That bitch shot my daughter"

"What?" Sam exclaimed while getting up. "Well, where is she? Is she going to be okay?"

"I don't know" Ellen said. "She's still in the emergency room" Then, as if those last two words were some kind of switch, she broke down and cried.

Sam put his arms around her and let her tears dampen his T-shirt. After a few seconds where the silence was only varied by Ellen's sobs, Sam took her shoulders. "I will call Cas and he will heal Jo" he said and he breathed deeply. "He couldn't heal Dean, he didn't have the strength" He looked up to Ellen. "But he will now. He will heal Jo. Don't be afraid. You won't lose your daughter. I won't let it happen"

But Ellen didn't hear the last few sentences. She had stopped listening after Sam told her Cas hadn't been able to heal Dean. She freed herself from Sam and walked around the bed.

"Zoey tried to kill Cas" Sam explained trembling. "Dean threw himself before him"

Ellen swallowed. "Where is he?"

"Cas?" Sam asked. "I don't know"

"Get him here" Ellen said bitter.

* * *

**Part 4**

'_Cas? I know you can hear me, so don't ignore my calls. I know you're having a hard time right now and no one blames you. But we need you. We need your help. It's not your fault, okay? But you have to get back here"_

Cas heard Sam's call perfectly as he stared into Andy's face. Andy looked from Cas to Zoey.

"What the hell happened here?" he said breathing fast.

"I killed her" Cas confessed.

"I can see that" Andysaid shocked. He kneeled next to the body. "Did anyone see you come in?"

"I don't think so" Cas said.

"Good" Andy said. "Go"

"What?" Cas asked confused.

"I said go" Andy said sharp. "Get out. I'll clean this up"

"You're not going to turn me in? Why?" Cas asked surprised.

Andy looked up. "Zoey killed Shannen and she was going to let me take the blame" He paused for a few seconds. "I was wrong about you" He nodded at the body. "See this as an apology"

"Apology accepted" Cas said and he disappeared.

* * *

**Part 5**

Cas appeared outside Dean's room, ignoring the short shrieks of the nurses. He opened the door and Sam looked up.

"You came" he said relieved.

"I'm sorry I left" Cas said. "There were things I needed to take care of"

"Yeah, sure, but can you save that for later?" Sam said. "Right now we really need your help"

"What's going on?" Cas asked numb.

"Zoey didn't just shoot Dean. She also shot Jo" Sam said.

"Jo's dead?" Cas asked soft. Sam shook his head. "No, not yet" he said. "But her life's hanging by a thread and you might be her only hope"

Cas shrugged. "Don't worry. I got this" he said and he vanished. He materialized in the ICU where Jo was lying in coma, connected to all kinds of machines. Cas walked around the bed and lay his index and middle finger on Jo's temple.

But nothing happened.

"Come on" Cas said annoyed and he tried again. He took a few steps back and looked upset at Jo's unconscious body. He vanished again and appeared back in Dean's room.

"Did you do it? Did you heal Jo?" Sam asked nervous. When Cas shook his head he said: "Why not?"

"I couldn't" Cas said.

"What?" Sam asked.

"My powers don't work" Cas said scared. He looked up at Sam. "I can't be here right now"

And that being said he flew away.

* * *

**Part 6**

"What do you mean, he couldn't?" Ellen asked upset.

"He said he tried to, but he failed. He said his powers don't work" Sam explained.

"Why don't they work? Where is he?" Ellen asked angry. "I'm going to kick his ass until he heals my daughter"

She turned around and started walking.

"Ellen!"

She turned around. "What?" she snapped.

"I don't think yelling at him will do much good" Sam warned.

"Then I'll save that for plan B" Ellen said.

"What's plan A?" Sam asked.

"Begging him" Ellen said. "On my knees if I have to" And she turned around.

Cas was sitting on the ground in one of the hospital hallways. He held his phone against his ear- he had been rather surprised he still had it- and was talking to someone.

"Hi…Meg" he said soft. "I'm sorry to bother you, but…I didn't know who else to call. Dean's dead, Jo's dying and I can't heal her. My friends are dying one by one and there's nothing I can do to stop it" He stopped to wipe his nose and to take a deep breath. "I know I probably sound like a toddler crying for his mother, but I have no one else to turn to" He noticed Ellen coming his way, from the corner of his eye. "I have to go"

"Were you calling someone?" Ellen asked.

"Meg" Cas said, in an apologizing way, while he put his phone in his pocket. "I know why you're here, but I can't help you" he said as he scribbled up.

"Jo's all I have left" Ellen said.

"That's more than I can say for myself" Cas commented.

"That's not true. You still have Sam" Ellen said.

"You really think I can stay here after I got Dean killed?" Cas said.

"No one's holding that against you" Ellen said.

"I don't get it" Cas said. "My powers should work. They didn't work with Dean, because I wasn't fully recovered, but I'm fine now. Why can't I heal Jo?"

"I'm not an expert, but I'm guessing Dean's death has an influence on your powers. You're upset and that's normal" Ellen said.

"So you mean I just have to deal with Dean's death and then I'll be able to save Jo?" Cas asked sarcastically. "In that case…you're screwed" He started walking, when Ellen grabbed his arm.

"Listen up, dick, I get you're upset, but get this. Dean is dead and he's not coming back. And sitting here, beating yourself up about it isn't going to change anything. So get up, pull yourself together and do something" Ellen said furious.

* * *

**Part 7**

Cas took Ellen's arm and disappeared. He landed in the ICU, next to Jo's bed.

"Warn me if someone's coming. I don't know how long this will take" Cas said dispassionately. Ellen nodded and walked to the door. She opened it and walked outside.

Cas sank down on the bed and lay his hands on both Jo's temples. He closed his eyes and prayed for Jo to open her eyes.

And she did. At first everything was a blur. She reached out her hand and touched Cas' face. "Dean?" she mumbled weak. When Cas' face became clearer she withdrew her hand. "I'm sorry"

Cas didn't reply, but turned his head around at the sound of the door opening. Ellen had seen Jo's awakening and now she was walking fast to the bed. She threw her arms around Jo and started crying from relief.

Cas stood from the bed. "I'm going to leave you two alone" he said. But before he could fly away Ellen grabbed his hand. "Thank you" she said. "Don't mention it" Cas replied and he left them alone.

* * *

**Part 8**

Sam was back at the motel, when the door opened and Ellen and Jo came in. Sam looked up and his eyes widened. "Jo" he sighed relieved. He walked to her and threw his arms around her. "You're alive, thank God"

"Yeah" Jo said, tapping Sam's shoulder.

Sam scratched his neck. "Eh, do you want some coffee? I can make some" he suggested.

"No, don't bother, we're good" Ellen said.

"It's no bother" Sam said. "I was going to make some anyway" And thus he walked to the kitchen.

"Where's Dean? I'd like to see him. He wasn't in his room anymore" Jo said.

"Eh, yeah, they, eh,…they brought him to the mortuary" Sam explained. They heard a blow and both Ellen and Jo hurried to the kitchen to see Sam had dropped the coffeepot.

"I'm sorry. I'll get a mob" Sam said distracted.

"No, I'll do it" Ellen said. "Jo, take Sam outside. He needs some air"

Jo took Sam's arm and Sam let her pull him along, until they were outside. He leaned against the wall and rubbed his eyes.

"Dean's dead, Jo" Sam said and his voice skipped. "My big brother's dead"

* * *

**Part 9**

Night came in and Cas was standing on a crossroad. He buried a small, tin box in the ground and then took a step back.

"Get your ass down, here, Crowley!" he yelled.

A few long seconds later Crowley appeared. "Give me one good reason why I wouldn't kill you this very instant"

"Because I have something better in store" Cas said. He took a deep breath and then continued. "You have to bring Dean back to life"

"Let me guess, I get your soul in return" Crowley said bored. "Sorry, but that's getting so old. Nice chatting" He wanted to leave, when Cas quickly said: "Not my soul, my powers"

Crowley came closer. "Why would I want the powers of an angel?"

"You'd be even more powerful. Probably undefeatable" Cas said.

"And you'd be human" Crowley said slowly.

"And much less of a threat to you" Cas added.

"So you get Dean back and I get all your angel mojo" Crowley summed up. "Sounds tempting" He grabbed Cas' hand and squeezed it. "It's a deal" He let go. "By the way, how are your insides?"

"What?" Cas frowned. Then he gasped for air and held his stomach. He gagged and threw up blood. He collapsed and lost conscious.

* * *

**Part 10**

Sam, Jo and Ellen were standing around Dean's bed in the mortuary. There was a book where people could write down their condolences, but since Dean didn't know that many people, the book would be as good as empty.

Jo took Dean's hand and brought it to her lips. She kissed his fingers, while tears rolled over her face. Then something magnificent happened. Dean pinched Jo's hand.

"Dean?" Jo said breathless. Sam and Ellen looked up at Dean. They saw his eyelids move and slowly they opened.

"Dean!" Sam exclaimed. Dean blinked his eyes and sat up. He looked around. "Where the hell am I?" he mumbled.

"Doesn't matter, you're alive" Sam said.

"How long did you get, Sammy?" Dean asked. Sam frowned. "Don't play dumb with me. How long did you get until Crowley collects your soul?"

"You think I made a deal to save your life?" Sam asked.

"Didn't you?" Dean fired back with raised eyebrows.

"No, Dean, I'm sorry" Sam said.

"Someone must've done something or else I'd still be dead" Dean said.

"Yeah, I agree, but it wasn't me" Sam said.

"Then who was it?" Dean wondered.

* * *

**Soundtrack list:**

Green Day: Don't leave me (1x01, Sam brings Dean to the hospital)The Airborne Toxic Event: Welcome to your wedding day (1x02, Cas avenges Dean's death)Mumford and Sons: After the storm (1x03, Sam hears about Jo)Switchfoot: I dare you to move (1x04, Andy helps Cas get out)Pete Yorn: Lose you (1x05, Jo's life hanging by a thread)Greg Laswell: Carry me through (1x06, Cas calls Meg)Tyrone Wells: All I can do (1x07, Cas heals Jo)Matt Nathanson: Solace and pain (1x08, Sam realizes Dean is dead)Placebo: Protect me from what I want (1x09, Cas makes a deal with Crowley)The Afters: Never going back to okay (1x10, Dean wakes up) 


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Human **

**Part 1**

Dean and Sam rushed into the hospital, to the reception room. "Hi, my friend was brought in here" "What's your friend's condition?" the receptionist asked. "Eh" Dean hesitated, looking at Sam.

"Sam! Dean!"

The Winchesters turned around and saw Anna running their way. "Come with me, I know where he is" she said. She turned around again and Sam and Dean followed her. "I found him lying in the middle of a crossroad, bleeding badly. I've been having this bad feeling all day and I'm so furious with myself that I didn't look for him sooner"

She stopped at a door. "We can't go in, they're still operating him"

"What's wrong with him?" Sam asked. "I mean, why can't he just heal?"

"I don't know" Anna sighed. "I tried to heal him, but I can't. It must've been some hell of a deal he made"

The door opened and the surgeon came outside. "Can I help you?" he asked looking from Dean to Sam.

"Yeah, I'm Dean, this is Sam" Dean said, pointing at Sam, when he said his name. "We're friends of Cas"

"Cas?" the surgeon frowned. Then realization hit him. "That's his name?"

Dean nodded.

"Look, I won't sugarcoat it" the surgeon started. "Your friend's condition is very critical. If he doesn't get a new pair of kidneys and liver he will die"

"Then get him those things" Dean snapped.

"It's not that easy" the surgeon said. "They have to be compatible with his blood and body. So if you know his family you get them here. They're the biggest chance he has on survival" He walked back inside the emergency room.

"We're screwed" Dean said.

"No, we're not" Anna said determined. "I'll get him what he needs" And she took flight.

* * *

**Part 2**

Hell.

Crowley was training his new powers on some of his demons, while he thought of all the things he could do with it. The ironic thing was that Cas had given him his powers to save Dean, and the first thing Crowley wanted to do with his new abilities was drain the life out of that Winchester chucklehead.

But that wouldn't be the most clever plan ever. The Winchesters would probably expect him to strike now. So, maybe, he should send someone else.

As if on cue, Kevin appeared and a malicious smile appeared on Crowley's face.

"Kevin!" he exclaimed and Kevin turned to Crowley.

"Yes, Mr. Crowley?" Kevin said.

"I have something, but I can't use it right now" Crowley started cryptic. "Could you keep it in storage for me?"

"Of course. What is it?" Kevin wanted to know.

"Trust me, the less you know the better" Crowley replied. He put his hand on Kevin's chest and an instant later Kevin's chest started glowing. When the glowing stopped Crowley withdrew his hand. "How do you feel?"

"I feel…different" Kevin said slowly, looking at his hands. "But in a good way" He looked up at Crowley, excited. "What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to find that demon skank" Crowley said dark. "You will find it particularly easy to kill her"

* * *

**Part 3**

Anna materialized in the ICU. The doctors had brought Cas here. There was nothing they could do as long as they didn't have the donors they needed.

Anna, holding a pair of kidneys in her left hand and a liver in her right hand, quickly walked to the bed. She removed the sheets with her mind and cut open Cas' belly. While blood streamed alongside Cas' unconscious body and on the matrass, Anna put the organs in their rightful place.

The monitor started beeping and Anna vanished, when a team of doctor's came rushing into the intensive care.

"I need to talk to security" the doctor said, when he'd fixed up Cas' injuries properly. "Someone was here. Someone attempted to kill this man"

"Someone who gave him the organs he needed?" his assistant frowned. "Why would anyone do that?"

"I don't know" the doctor said. "But I want someone to keep an eye on him, as long as he's here"

* * *

**Part 4**

Meg was walking down some unknown street. It was dark and she narrowed her eyes to see where she was heading. What the hell was wrong with her sight? She passed a turn and arrived at a parking lot. There were no cars, but there was someone standing on the other side of the parking lot. The streetlights were on and so she recognized him.

"Kevin" Meg said slowly. "What are you doing here? Aren't you scared? All alone, in the dark? Shouldn't you go run back to Daddy Crowley?" she scoffed.

"Funny you mention Crowley" Kevin said with a faint smile. "He gave me a present. To thank me for my loyalty. He told me I should try them out…on you"

Meg smirked and held her head diagonally. "Then give it your best shot"

Kevin motioned with his hand, having no clue of what would happen. Light came out of his hand and a second later Meg shrieked and fell down on the ground. She held her hand against her bleeding side and slowly scribbled up. She had tried to shimmer, but failed

"What? How did you do that?" she asked, scared and out of breath. "Those are not the powers of a demon. Those are the powers of an angel. Where did you get those?"

"What does it matter? I have them now" Kevin answered. "Here's what I'll do. I'll give you a ten seconds head start, no more, no less. And then I'll kill you. One…two…"

Meg started walking backwards, then turned around and ran like hell.

* * *

**Part 5**

Dean was sitting on a chair, next to Cas' hospital bed. There was only one visitor allowed and Sam and Dean had agreed to switch turns.

"Why are you so reckless?" Dean mumbled helpless.

The next moment Cas sat up and gasped for air.

"Cas?" Dean said and he stood up. He wanted to call a doctor when Cas took his hand.

"Am I alive?" he asked faint.

"Yeah" Dean nodded relieved. "You're alive"

Cas closed his eyes and fell asleep.

A couple of hours later he woke up and saw he had company. Dean hadn't left, and Sam, Jo, Ellen and Anna had joined him.

"You gave us all a big fright" Anna mumbled. She tried to keep her voice under control.

"I'm sorry" Cas apologized softly.

"Just get better, okay?" Anna replied. "And try not to get killed" She looked up. "I have to go. If you need me, just give me a call"

She left and Cas tried to avoid the stares of his friends.

"How did you do it? What kind of deal did you make?" Dean insisted.

"I offered Crowley my powers," Cas started to explain. "in exchange for your life"

"Cas!" Dean exclaimed. "Why did you do that? Without your powers you're basically-"

"-a baby in a trench coat, I know" Cas finished grumpy. "I thought you said you were going to teach me how to use a gun"

"You heard that?" Dean asked surprised.

Cas nodded. "And I suggest we get started right away" He wanted to get out of bed, but Dean stopped him.

"You're not going anywhere. Not until you're fully recovered" Dean said strictly.

"I feel fine, Dean" Cas commented.

"I don't care. You stay in bed" Dean said. "And don't even think about sneaking out. I will stay here to make sure you don't go anywhere"

"Can I still go to the bathroom?" Cas asked.

Dean thought about that. "Only if you really have to" he eventually answered.

* * *

**Part 6**

Meg staggered alongside the walls in the hospital. She held her left hand against her side and with her right hand she sought support. She had to find that idiot of an angel. She had listened to her voicemail and she figured he'd be here. It was at least worth a shot.

She saw a door opening near the end of the aisle. Dean came out of the room and looked her way. Meg quickly rotated her head and Dean walked passed her. Meg accelerated her steps as much as possible, leaving a trail and entered the room Dean had just left.

"What the hell did you do?" she exclaimed.

"Meg!" Cas jumped up. He noticed blood dripping on the floor. "Oh my God, you're bleeding" He quickly got out of bed and walked to her. He tried to lift up her sweater, but she stopped him.

"Don't touch me" Meg snapped.

Dean held his steps. Did he really just see blood on the walls? He turned around and walked back. There was indeed blood on the walls and the floor and they led back to where Dean came from.

"What happened?" Cas asked worried.

"Kevin" Meg replied bitter. "I encountered him. He said Crowley gave him a present and he wanted to try it out on me. I tried to get away, but I couldn't. He has the powers of an angel, so what did you do?" she repeated her first question.

"I gave my angel powers to Crowley, in order to save Dean's life" Cas explained. "And without my powers I'm…" His eyes bulged when he realized what was going on. "Oh my God…Meg, you're human"

"You make it sound like a good thing!" Meg snapped. "It's not. It's the worst thing that could've happened to me! Everything that happens to you happens to me, remember?"

"I didn't know you still had my blood in your system" Cas mumbled shy.

"Why couldn't you wait a few days? Dean was already dead, it wouldn't have made any difference for him" Meg commented angry.

The door opened and Dean came inside. "Meg! Can you be a little more quiet? What are you doing here?"

Meg wanted to reply, when her face turned pale and her eyes rolled in their sockets. She lost her balance, but Cas caught her before she hit the ground.

* * *

**Part 7**

Cas carried Meg to the bed and lay her down. He removed her sweater and held his breath. On the place Kevin had hit her there was a big gap and Meg was losing blood on a rapid pace. Cas turned to Dean, begging for help.

Dean looked down at the badly injured ex-demon. Meg had done countless of evil things. She deserved to die like this. The wound would get infected, she'd get a fever, and then she would die.

"Dean, do something!" Cas yelled desperate.

Dean rotated his head to his best friend, who leaned forward.

"She's not breathing" Cas panicked.

Another few crucial seconds passed by wherein Dean stood by and tried to make up his mind on what he was supposed to do. Then he rushed to the bed. "Call a doctor, now!" he commanded Cas.

Cas hurried to the door and called for a doctor. Dean ripped Meg's shirt open and put both his hands on the spot between her breasts. "Cas, come here, I need your help" Cas hurried back to the bed. "Grab those sheets and press them hard against the wound" Dean said. Cas did what Dean told him and pressed the sheets against Meg's side.

"What are you doing?" he asked scared, when Dean's hands began to pump up and down on Meg's chest.

"Saving her life" Dean said dark.

* * *

**Part 8**

A couple of hours later Meg opened her eyes. She sat up, but regretted it immediately. She removed the sheets and pulled up her hospital apron and discovered a bandage on her side.

"You have to leave it there" a gravelle voice said. Meg looked up and saw Cas standing in the doorway. "Are you still angry with me?" he asked careful.

"Yes" Meg said insensitive.

"Are you scared Crowley will come after you?" Cas asked.

"He already did" Meg replied bitchy. She climbed out of bed. "Where are my clothes?"

"Why? What are you going to do?" Cas frowned confused.

"I can't stay here. I'm a sitting duck in here. I have to get out" Meg explained nervous.

"You could come with me" Cas suggested hopeful. "Dean and Sam will help me protect you"

"You? Protect me? You can hardly take care of yourself" Meg scoffed. "You can't even button up your own shirt"

"I can learn" Cas defended himself seriously.

"You want to do something for me?" Meg asked. "Ask your boyfriend if he can drive me to the cheapest motel in town. I can't afford much now"

"You could live for free if you stayed with us" Cas mumbled.

"No! I don't want to be anywhere near you! You did this to me! I don't want to have anything to do with you. I wish I had never met you! Now get out of my way before I kill you" Meg lashed out. She pushed him aside and walked fast to the door.

"Meg, wait!" Cas yelled.

"Now, what?" Meg deeply sighed and she turned her head annoyed.

"You need clothes" Cas said careful. "I can ask Dean if he could ask Jo if she could get you some. She already knows your size"

Meg hated to admit it, but she knew Cas was right. She couldn't leave, wearing nothing but a hospital apron.

"Fine, you win" she gave in reluctantly. She walked to a chair, as far away from Cas as possible. Cas made half a step towards her, when Meg cast him a nasty glance. "Don't even think about it" Cas swallowed and sank back down the bed.

* * *

**Part 9**

Jo parked the car in front of a cheap looking motel. The lights flickered, the windows were no longer see through and above the entrance there was a damaged board that once spelled the word 'WELCOME', but due to age and neglect only the first three letters were still readable.

"This is the best I could find" Jo said. She had found it a better idea if she had been the one taking Meg away. Dean and Meg in the same space was never a good idea, even if he did save her life.

"It's good enough for me" Meg commented. She loosened her seatbelt and wanted to step out.

"Hang on" Jo said and she searched her purse. She pulled out some money and gave it to Meg. "Just for starters"

"Thanks" Meg said not very enthused.

"You have to get a job" Jo continued. "You have to get your own money"

"How? I can't do anything. It's not like I went to school" Meg said sarcastic.

"I'm sure there's something you're good at. Something you don't need to be a demon for" Jo replied. Meg raised her eyebrows. "I highly doubt it" she mumbled. "Could you do me one little favor? Don't tell Cas where I am. I don't want him to come looking for me"

"Is it really such a bad thing for you to be human? Don't you think they might look at you differently now?" Jo propounded.

"No" Meg shook her head. "Dean and Sam will always see me as the demon that killed you and your mom. And the demon that got Bobby Singer in a wheelchair. They will never see me as a human being…Thanks for the ride and the clothes"

She took the bag of clothes Jo had bought her and opened the door. She stepped out and walked to the motel. She didn't bother turning around to wave Jo goodbye.

* * *

**Part 10**

Cas was sitting at a table in the corner of a café. He had sneaked out of the hospital shortly after Meg had left. Apparently Meg had given Dean his number, because his phone wouldn't stop buzzing. But Cas didn't want Dean's company right now. He just wanted to be left alone.

Three men were lurking at him from the bar. Cas could feel their eyes on him and he looked up. They were mumbling to each other and if Cas had still been an angel he would know what they were talking about. But now their whispered conversation remained a mystery to him.

He stood up and headed for the exit. He didn't like it in here. He quickly walked outside and pulled out his phone. Suddenly he'd really appreciate Dean's company, but before he could dial the number, someone grabbed the phone and forced him to turn around.

"I know you"

It were the three men who had been staring at him.

"You're the dude who raped that little girl"

"I didn't do that" Cas replied trembling. He pushed the men away and walked away. He heard their footsteps behind them and accelerated his own.

"How did you do it? How did you convince the poor thing to say you were innocent? Did you make her believe she actually wanted it?"

Cas stopped and turned around. "I didn't have to convince her. I didn't do anything" He turned back around and walked away so fast he was almost running. The three didn't seem to follow him anymore and with a relieved heart he walked around the corner of the street, which didn't lead anywhere. He'd have to go back or cross the street.

But before he could make up his mind someone grabbed him and pushed him hard against the wall.

"What do you want from me?" Cas exclaimed scared.

"I want you to feel the pain you caused Alexia Moore. I want you to feel her pain, her humiliation"

Their spokesman signed with his hand and his companions turned Cas around and pushed him with his face against the wall.

While they held him tightly, the man who had been doing all the talking opened his belt.

* * *

**Soundtrack**

Within Temptation: Dark wings (2x01, Cas is having surgery) Angus and Julia Stone: Black crow (2x02, Crowley gives the angel powers to Kevin)Ben Rector: Bright lights (2x03, Anna gives the medical staff a hand)Evanescence: Sweet sacrifice (2x04, Kevin tries to kill Meg)Walk the Moon: Next in line (2x05, Cas tells Sam and Dean what kind of deal he made)The Calling: When it all falls down (2x06, Meg is angry with Cas)3 Doors Down: It's not my time (2x07, Dean saves Meg)Florence+The Machine: Drumming Song (2x08, Cas wants Meg to stay with him)Kari Kimmel: One day you'll be fine (2x09, Jo takes Meg to a hotel)Lifehouse: Simon (2x10, Cas is being raped)

I know I'm taking a chance with this storyline. I've never been through something like that, so I really hope I don't offend any victims of sexual abuse. If I did, I apologize. I can assure you Cas won't get over it easily. I don't even know yet if he's ever going to.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 : Fever**

**Part 1**

Dean entered the café Cas had left an hour ago. Cas had called him by using speed dial, but then his phone dropped and all he could hear was a struggle and someone saying 'I know you'

Dean had looked almost everywhere. He had asked for him in eat café's, restaurants, coffee shops, while he tried getting him on the phone.

He walked to the bar and tapped on it.

"Good evening, I'm looking for someone. A man, tall, dark hair, wears a trench coat" Dean described Cas.

The barkeeper, who knew who Dean was talking about, peeked at the three men who had returned. Then he turned back to Dean. "Sorry, I haven't seen him"

Dean, who noticed the constant glares from the barkeeper to the three, nodded and turned around. Cas had been here, but Dean wouldn't get any information out of the barkeeper or the customers. So he left the café and walked down the street. It didn't take long before he found Cas' phone. He bent through his knees and picked it up.

"Cas?!" Dean called. He kept walking to the end of the street, which didn't lead anywhere. He turned his head and then noticed the blood on the wall. He looked down and saw there was blood on the pavers as well. He followed the trail to a dark alley, where the trail stopped.

"Cas?!" Dean yelled again.

At the end of the alley something moved. A dark figure slowly scribbled up, as if every little movement he made hurt like hell. He closed his trench coat tightly around him, since that was all the clothing he had left.

The first thing Dean saw were bare, bloodied feet shuffling forward, followed by abraded legs. Dean hurried to his best friend.

"What the hell happened to you?" he asked, even though he had a suspicion. "Wait here, I'll go get the car"

A few minutes later Dean positioned the Impala before the alley and stepped out. He walked back to Cas and supported him until they reached the car. Cas frowned when he sat down, which confirmed Dean's suspicion.

Dean started the engines and wanted to drive to the motel he, Sam, Ellen and Jo were staying for the time being.

"Dean" Cas said difficult. He had to squeeze the words out. "Could you take me to Meg?"

"What? Why?" Dean asked a little offended. He was the one who'd been looking for Cas everywhere. Not Meg. Meg has dumped him.

"Please, Dean" Cas begged him. "It's not you…I…I just…It's difficult for me to be around you…or Sam" he ended ashamed.

"Alright, then" Dean sighed. "But first we need to get you some clothes"

He turned the car and drove back to their motel.

* * *

**Part 2**

Dean parked the Impala in front of the motel Meg was staying. "Are you sure about this?" he asked, turning to Cas.

Cas nodded. "Thank you" he said hoarse. "For not telling Sam" Dean didn't comment, but loosened his seat belt and got out of the car. He walked around it, when Cas stepped out too.

"No, wait here" Dean said. "Let me go first"

"Why?"

"She's not very happy with you, right now. I might have to use a little persuasion" Dean explained.

"What kind of persuasion?" Cas asked suspicious.

"Just trust me, alright?" Dean replied. "I promise I won't call her any names" He turned around and walked to the motel.

After knocking six times the door finally went opened and Meg appeared in a white dressing gown. "Are you kidding me? It's after midnight. What the hell did I do now?" she complained.

"Nothing yet" Dean quickly answered.

"Then why are you here?" Meg asked short. "Did Cas send you to spy on me?"

"Cas doesn't have to send me. He came here himself" Dean replied and he stepped aside, so Meg could see Cas leaning against the car.

"Are you now going to help him stalk me?" Meg asked with raised eyebrows.

"No, he needs your support" Dean explained. "I don't like it either, but he wanted me to take him to you, so I did"

"You could've saved yourself the trouble" Meg said careless. "I've got my own problems" She started to turn around when Dean grabbed her shoulders and forced her to turn around again.

Cas looked up, alarmed.

"I really couldn't give a rat's ass about your humanity issues" Dean snapped angry. "The way I see it you're still a murderer. You just went from demon slut to regular slut"

"Well, that's one way to win me over" Meg commented sarcastically.

"But that's not how Cas sees you. He thinks there's something good in you and I'd hate for him to be disappointed" Dean continued quickly. He took a deep breath. Cas had begged him not to tell anyone, but he had no other choice.

Cas saw how Meg looked in his direction and her expression told him she knew. He quickly averted his head.

Dean walked back to the car.

"It's done, dude" he said.

"Thanks, Dean" Cas replied.

"Yeah" Dean said. "You better go now and get to sleep. I'm picking you up as soon as the sun's up. See if we can get that whole shooting a gun thing started"

Cas took of his trench coat and reached it to Dean. "Can you get rid of it? Bury it or burn it, I don't care. I don't want to see it anymore" Dean accepted the coat and got in his car. He drove away as Cas walked up to Meg's motel and entered.

* * *

**Part 3**

The next morning.

Cas woke up on the couch of Meg's motel. He slowly sat up and rubbed his eyes. Light shone through the curtains and Cas stood up and walked to them to open them. Dean's Impala was parked across the street.

Meg ticked on the side windows of Dean's car and Dean jumped up. He frowned and blinked to remember where he was. When he did, he turned the window down.

"What are you doing here so early?" Meg asked.

"What's in the bag?" Dean nodded at the small paper bag Meg was holding in her right hand.

"Breakfast" Meg replied short.

"Thanks, you shouldn't have" Dean said and he jerked the bag out of her hands. As a human Dean was a lot quicker than Meg and all she could do was look offended as Dean crammed the pastry in his mouth.

"Cud you tull Cas to huwwy a lil?" Dean mumbled inaudible.

"Come again?" Meg asked with raised eyebrows.

Dean swallowed. "Could you tell Cas to hurry a little?" he repeated his question. "I told him I was going to take him shooting today"

"Alright, just wait here" Meg replied and she walked to the motel. She entered, but didn't see Cas anywhere. Then she heard the shower. She walked to the bathroom, closed her eyes and walked inside.

"Hi, Meg" Cas greeted her. "Why are your eyes closed?" he frowned.

"Because you're naked" Meg explained. "Grab a towel and wind it around your waist, please"

Cas did what she asked him to.

"You decent?" Meg checked. Cas nodded, forgetting Meg couldn't see him. "Cas?"

"You can open your eyes" Cas said quickly.

Meg opened her eyes and averted her head.

"What's wrong?" Cas wondered.

"Eh…Dean's waiting for you" Meg avoided his question.

"Yeah, he's going to teach me how to use a gun" Cas said.

"Have fun" Meg replied sarcastic. "Don't be early"

"What are you going to do?" Cas asked.

"I'm not telling you" Meg answered. "Now, hurry up. Get dressed, before Dean thinks I'm trying to drown you in the shower"

Cas started to unfold the towel and Meg turned around and quickly left the bathroom.

* * *

**Part 4**

Dean, Cas and Sam were standing in an open field. There was a low wall at the end of the field and Sam had placed some cans on it.

Dean showed Cas how to prepare a gun and then made a few shots at the cans. He didn't miss one.

"You're really good at this" Cas said admiring. Dean handed the weapon to him. "Your turn", he said, when Sam had put the cans back and stepped away from the wall as far as possible. He didn't really trust Cas with a gun.

Cas aimed the gun at the walls and fired and missed.

"I think you just killed a tree" Sam joked. "If I were you, I'd hide for Mother Nature"

"Really?" Cas asked concerned.

"No" Dean answered, casting an annoyed glance at his brother. "Try again" he said serious.

Cas pointed the gun at the cans, fired and missed again. "I suck" he said grumpy and he threw the gun on the ground. He turned around and walked away.

Dean shot a confused look at Sam, who pulled up his shoulders.

"Cas!" Dean called. "Get back here!"

"No!" Cas shouted back, without turning around and he walked faster. Dean rolled his eyes and ran to him.

"What's going on with you?" he asked when he'd overhauled Cas.

"Nothing" Cas snapped.

"Really? Could've fooled me" Dean replied sarcastically. "Then why are you acting like an angry teen?"

"Because…I'm hungry" Cas answered pissed off. "And I'm wearing the same clothes as I did last night and they're not even mine. I'm useless and Meg hates me"

Dean widened his eyes. "Okay, I take everything back I just said. You're not acting like an angry teen, you're acting like a drama queen"

"I'm not-" Cas started to defend himself, but Dean cut him off.

"Let's try it one more time. After that I promise we'll grab a snack and get you some new clothes" he said, feeling somewhat guilty. After all it was his fault his best friend was now starving.

"I'll miss again, you know" Cas said sad.

"Use your imagination" Dean advised. "Imagine you're shooting a person, not a can" He took Cas arm and dragged him back to the field. Sam had already picked up the gun and gave it to Cas. Cas aimed it at the cans, fired and kept firing until all bullets were used.

He pushed the weapon in Dean's arms and walked to the car.

"What's his problem?" Sam asked, looking at Dean, who was looking at Cas.

"He's hungry" Dean answered.

"You sure that's it?" Sam asked doubtful.

"No" Dean sighed.

* * *

**Part 5**

"Your résumé is extremely…blank" the man in the temp job office noticed as he looked at the paper Meg had given him. She had written it this morning. "You've worked as a nurse in a mental clinic for some weeks. Do you have a degree as a nurse?"

"Yeah" Meg nodded. "I should've brought it with me"

"Why don't you go home and come back with your degree. Then, maybe, I can do something for you" the man said.

"All right" Meg answered and she got up. She turned around and left the office. She leaned against the wall and took a deep breath. She didn't have a degree.

"Hey" a female voice said soft and smoke swirled before Meg's face. Meg looked up and saw a young woman standing in front of her. She was offering her a cigarette. Meg accepted it and took a haul.

"Let me guess. You don't have the right references, only the sucky jobs are open and they'll call you when they find something that fits you" the woman summed up.

"Speaking out of experience?" Meg asked as she took another haul. She took the cigarette out of her mouth and examined it. "What is this?"

"You like it?" the woman smirked. Then she became serious. "I think I can help you out. My husband and I own a company and we're looking for some new staff"

"What kind of company?" Meg asked uninterested, the joint pinched between her lips. The woman searched in her pockets and conjured a small card.

"Here's my number and the address of our company. Give me a call or come over whenever you want to" the woman said.

"And you really think this is something for me?" Meg asked, examining the card.

"You're a pretty girl" the woman said. "We could use someone like you"

* * *

**Part 6**

If Dean and Sam had hoped Cas would be in a better mood after putting some food in his stomach, their hopes were now buried very deep into the ground. After finishing his lunch he threw his plastic plate on the floor.

"Why did you do that?" Sam hissed, as he leaned to the floor to pick up the garbage. Cas shrugged. "You're acting really odd, Castiel. Has anyone told you?" Sam said a little annoyed. Cas shrugged again. "Stop…shrugging. If this is about Meg, then just tell me"

"I don't have to tell you anything" Cas replied with his gravelled voice. He stood and as Sam wanted to do the same he cast the younger Winchester a warning stare. "I'm going to the bathroom. I don't need your help with that"

As he left Sam turned to his brother, who watched Cas' back. "Do you have any idea of what's wrong with him?" he asked sharp, requiring an honest answer.

"Actually, I do" Dean answered and he took a sip from his beer. "But don't ask me what, I promised I wouldn't tell"

"Come on, Dean!" Sam objected.

"Sorry, Sammy" Dean replied. "If you want to know, you have to ask our angel"

"Okay, I will" Sam said and he stood and walked to the bathroom.

* * *

**Part 7**

Meg was sleeping on the couch. She was so bored she had fallen asleep. She abruptly woke up when someone was banging the door and she had to get up.

"What?" she asked grumpy when she saw Anna standing in the doorway.

"Can I come in?" she asked as she entered the motel room. Meg raised her eyebrows as she closed the door. "We need to talk" Anna said casual. "You probably wonder why I didn't fly into your motel room"

"Not really, no" Meg commented slowly. "What do we have to talk about?" she asked slightly nervous. Now that she was a human, angels really scared the crap out of her.

Anna nodded at the bed. "Let's have a seat" she said and a second later she was sitting on the single bed. Meg reluctantly followed her example and sat on the bed. "We need to talk about demons. About Kevin. About the word of God" Anna started.

In all the misery they'd had with the Allen sisters, the tablet with God's word on it, kind of had slipped the ex-demon's mind.

"What do I have to do with that?" Meg asked in a defensive way.

"You're a demon" Anna answered obvious. "Or at least you used to be. You could hold a lot of important information and you might not even know it. Surely your mind didn't go blank when you became human" She rolled up her sleeves. "I hope you don't mind, but I'm going to have to read you"

Meg jumped up from the bed and walked away fast. "Oh, no. No way. You are not doing the whole sticking your hand into my stomach thing again. No way" she repeated.

"I'm sorry, Meg, but it wasn't a request" Anna said, though there was no sign of regret in her voice. She flew to Meg and dragged her to the bed. She got ready to read her, when Meg shouted: "Wait! You can't do this! If you hurt me, you'll hurt Cas. Everything that happens to me, happens to him"

Anna withdrew her arm and Meg sighed relieved. "Then I guess Cas will have to endure it. I'm sure he'll understand once I explain it to him" And she stuck her hand inside Meg's stomach.

* * *

**Part 8**

Sam opened the door to the men's room and saw Cas sitting on the cold stony floor. Sam rolled his eyes, thinking Cas was being dramatic again, and he walked towards him. But when he'd reached him he noticed Cas' eyes were closed.

Sam bent through his knees and touched Cas' shoulder. "Cas? Wake up, dude" he said.

Cas slowly opened his eyes and looked at Sam. "I passed out, I think"

"Yeah" Sam replied. He threw Cas' arm over his shoulder and helped him stand up. But the moment Sam let go of Cas, Cas grabbed his stomach and gasped for air. He bent through his knees and collapsed.

"Cas!" Sam exclaimed in panic. He ducked and slapped Cas' face. As his hand came in contact with Cas' skin he felt how Cas was burning up. He pulled out his phone and sent a tax to Dean. Dean came rushing into the men's room as soon as he'd read the tax.

"What's wrong?" he asked nervous.

"I don't know" Sam replied. "He just…collapsed. He's getting sick, Dean"

Dean looked from Sam to Cas, who was unconscious. He then searched his pockets and conjured his key, which he threw at Sam. "Go start the car. I'll take care of Cas"

Sam ran outside of the men's room, trying not to draw too many attention from the customers and the waitresses.

Dean threw Cas' arm over his shoulder and dragged him out of the men's room. The customers all gazed at the pair, but none of them stood up to help.

After what seemed like an eternity Dean reached the entrance. Sam had parked the car right in front of it and he stepped out of the car to go help his brother.

They laid Cas on the backseat. Dean placed himself behind the wheel, Sam sat next to him.

"Where are we taking him? The hospital?" Sam wanted to know.

"No. The hospital will ask questions" Dean said. "How are we going to explain he still doesn't have any legal papers?"

"Dean" Sam objected. "He could be really sick. We don't know what's wrong with him"

"Going to a hospital is asking for trouble" Dean refused. He pushed the accelerating pedal and drove full speed ahead.

* * *

**Part 9**

Meg was standing in front of a modern looking building. She pressed the intercom next to the door.

"Yes?" a female voice answered and Meg recognized it.

"Good evening, …ma'am" Meg said. Politeness was something new to her. "We met this afternoon, outside the temp job office. You said you might have work for me"

A short silence followed.

"Of course" the woman said slowly. "Why don't you come in? Just up the stairs" The woman hung up and a buzzing sound was heard. Meg pushed the door open and walked up the white stairs which was right in front of her.

Upstairs the woman was waiting for her. She looked a lot classier in her white cocktail dress and her hair tied up tightly. She was wearing high heels, makeup and her nails were polished. She wore a pearl necklace around her neck and golden earrings and three rings on each hand.

"Welcome" she said with a big smile whereby she revealed a row of snow-white teeth. "Claudia!" she shouted and an older woman appeared. She was wearing an apron and held a duster in her hand. She walked to the door and opened it.

"Thank you, Claudia" the woman said and she walked inside. Meg followed her and wanted to shut the door. "No, no, no, we don't do that" the woman stopped Meg and Claudia started to close the door. "Claudia, before you continue your cleaning I want you to bring me some green tea"

"Yes, ma'am" Claudia said and she closed the door.

The woman walked to the couch and signed at Meg to do the same.

"I just realized we haven't officially met yet" the woman said. "My name is Dorothy Cooper"

"Meg…Masters" Meg mumbled. She felt rather uncomfortable inside the fancy apartment.

"Let's get to business, shall we?" Dorothy suggested. She stood and walked to the antique, chestnut armoire and opened it. She pulled out a folder, closed the armoire and walked back to the couch. In the meantime Claudia had come back with the tea which she now poured into two cups.

"Thank you, Claudia" Dorothy said. "Go back to your work now"

Claudia left and Dorothy handed the folder to Meg. "Everything you have to know is in here"

Meg opened the folder and took out the papers that were in it. She tried to read it fast, but careful.

"You want me to work as a call girl?" she asked rather disgusted. "So, that's why you said I looked pretty"

"I know it's scary. You're afraid of what you're family and friends will think of you. But no one has to know. You'll get a codename, appointments are made by phone, by me, and you meet the clients at their house" Dorothy pleaded. "Besides, it pays really well and you can keep all the money"

Meg considered it. She really wanted to get her own place, to get away from Cas, who apparently couldn't take no for an answer.

"Where do I have to sign?" she asked determined.

Dorothy smiled and gave her a pen. She browsed to the final page and pointed at the bottom. "Right there, darling"

Meg took the pen, placed it on the paper and wrote her name. She gave the pen back to Dorothy and Dorothy accepted it while she put the papers back inside the folder.

"When do I start?" Meg wanted to know.

"I'll call you" Dorothy said and she gave Meg a notebook. "Write your phone number down, please" and she reached the pen to Meg.

Meg hesitated. Cas was the only one who had her number and she wasn't sure she wanted that to change. She reproached herself and accepted the pen and noted her number.

"Can't wait to get started" she said serious.

* * *

**Part 10**

Sam opened the door to their motel room and then hurried back to Dean. They carried Cas inside and laid him on the bed.

"I'll get something cold" Sam said and he ran into the kitchen. Dean opened the upper buttons of Cas' shirt as Sam came back with a cold and wet washcloth. He laid it on Cas' forehead and Cas shivered.

"Cas?" Dean frowned scared, but Cas' eyes remained shut. Dean looked helplessly at Sam.

"Maybe it's the organs" Sam suggested. "You know, his kidneys or his liver. Maybe his body can't adjust to them very well"

"Then why didn't he get sick before? Why now?" Dean snapped.

"I don't know, but Dean…" Sam sighed. "We need to get him to a hospital"

"We can't!" Dean replied angry.

"We can't let him die either" Sam fired back.

"You think I want that?" Dean shouted.

"Doesn't seem like you want to help him either" Sam yelled.

"SHUT UP! Both of you!"

Sam and Dean both looked up to see Anna standing in the room.

"What are you doing here?" Sam asked. Anna nodded at Cas. "Can you help him?" Dean wanted to know.

"No" Anna answered as she walked to the bed. "I can't heal humans. Not yet, at least. But that's okay, he doesn't need help"

"He doesn't?" Dean asked with raised eyebrows and very surprised. "Why not?"

"Because I know why he's ill" Anna explained. "I did it, but I didn't mean to hurt him. I was reading Meg and she told me she still had Cas' blood in her system and that if I hurt her I'd hurt Cas as well"

"But you didn't care" Dean commented.

"Of course I cared, but I had to get my information and Meg is like a library when it comes to demon information" Anna defended herself. "Cas will be okay"

"I hope you're right" Sam said.

"Now I have to go" Anna said. "Oh, and before I forget, I'm at a very important mission, so you can't call me every time you're ass is in trouble"

"We didn't call you!" Dean said offended, but Anna had already left.

Cas moved on the bed and slowly opened his eyes.

"Dean?" he mumbled with a huge amount of effort. Dean rushed to the bed and sank down on the bed. Cas' breath was going fast and irregular. "Anna…she's wrong…Meg doesn't have my blood in her system anymore"

As soon as he'd said that he closed his eyes again.

* * *

1. Trading Yesterday: Shattered

2. Phantom Planet: Better Off

3. Vertical Horizon: Miracle

4. Regina Spektor: Call Them Brothers

5. Tyler Hilton: When It Comes

6. Roxette: Speak To Me

7. Alanis Morissette: Versions of Violence

8. Paramore: Let the Flames Begin

9. Kate Nash: Paris

10. Snow Patrol: Downhill From Here


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: First Customer**

**Part 1**

One week later.

Whatever it was that had made Cas so ill, it looked like it was gone now. Anna had been right. He didn't need their help. Still it had been terrifying for Sam and Dean to see their friend suffering like that and not being able to help.

But Cas' condition had made Dean set a few things in motion. He and Sam had been to the city hall at night, when the place was empty, and Sam had hacked into the computer to make some legal papers for Cas.

"This is your ID" Dean said when he handed the ID card to Cas. "Your last name is Novak. Hope you don't mind"

Cas accepted the card. "Thank you, Dean"

"Now when you get sick again, we can take you to a hospital" Sam commented. Cas got up from the bed and rubbed his eyes. "How are you feeling?" Sam asked.

"Like rubber" Cas answered. "Have I been sleeping all week?" Dean nodded. "Did I talk in my sleep?" "No" Dean said. "But there was a moment when you woke up and you said that Meg didn't have your blood in her system and that it was something else that had made you ill. Do you remember that?"

Cas shook his head and then frowned concerned. "Meg" he said worried. "Did you tell her I'm here? She might wonder where I am"

"Yeah, I told her" Dean lied. "But she didn't really seem to care"

"What?" Cas said disappointed.

"I'm sorry, Cas, but she's a demon. She doesn't care for humans. You better forget her" Dean said insensitive.

"No" Cas replied determined. "I'm going to take a shower, because I smell. And then I'm going back to her"

* * *

**Part 2**

Meg opened the door of her motel room to let Cas in. Cas widened his eyes. "Did you paint your hair?" he asked, glaring at the blonde wisps on Meg's head.

"No, I woke up like this" Meg replied sarcastically. "The correct term is 'dye', by the way" She walked back into the motel and Cas followed her.

"I like it. It's shorter, but I like it" Cas said and he reached for Meg's hair, but she pulled away.

"So, eh, why are you here? I thought you'd moved back in with Dean and Sam" Meg asked casual, while she consciously tried to avoid looking at Cas. "You two lovebirds broke up already?"

"Dean's not my boyfriend" Cas answered.

"Okay" Meg scoffed.

"I'm sorry I didn't call you and tell you where I was" Cas said in an apologizing way. "But I was really ill and I couldn't tell you. I was asleep for a week, but Anna said she read you. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine" Meg mumbled.

"Dean said he called you" Cas said careful. "I had hoped you'd come and see how I was doing"

"Eh, yeah, sorry" Meg answered uncaring. "I was busy. I have a job. I'm actually working tonight"

"That's…really good" Cas commented and he tried to sound happy for her. Dean was right, Meg didn't care. "What kind of work?"

Meg poured herself a cup of coffee and drank from it before she answered. "As a call girl" If that confession was supposed to shock Cas, then Meg had completely failed in her purpose; Cas didn't even blink.

"What's a call girl?" he asked serious.

Now Meg was conflicted. If she told him the truth he'd leave her alone. But she didn't really want him to know she was sleeping around with other men for money.

"A call girl is someone who helps people with relationship problems, over the phone" she made up.

"That sounds like a noble cause" Cas replied.

"I guess" Meg said.

"We're leaving soon. You're not coming with us, are you?" Cas asked sad. Meg shook her head. Cas walked to her. "I'll stay if you want me to"

Meg looked away. "Why would I want that?" she asked difficult. Cas was invading her personal space. She tried to get away, but Cas placed his hands on the dresser, so Meg was trapped. He bowed his head and kissed her.

Meg put her hands on his chest, but if she tried to push him away, she didn't put much effort to it. Cas pulled away. "Consider this goodbye" he said soft. He took a few steps back and Meg tried to breath normally, while her heart was pounding in her chest. "I'll call you when we're settled. Good luck on your job"

He walked to the door and Meg watched him leave.

* * *

**Part 3**

Crowley and Balthazar were standing opposite each other. Balthazar had summoned Crowley to have a one on one chat about Kevin.

"You must possess an incredible amount of nerve to meet me here on your own" Crowley said mundane.

"We're kind of short on angels" Balthazar replied. "I know your time's precious, so is mine, so let me cut to the chase, shall I?"

"Please" Crowley answered uninterested.

"You have something that belongs to us" Balthazar started.

"You mean the tablet?" Crowley asked with raised eyebrows. "Or Kevin?"

"Both" Balthazar answered.

"And you expect me to just hand them over?" Crowley asked.

"Actually, I do" Balthazar said smiling. "See, if you don't, I will have to kill you"

Crowley smirked, not impressed in the least, and made a few steps to Balthazar. "May I remind you of who brought you back to life? And may I also remind you of a deal we made? Because the way I see it, you haven't exactly kept your end of the bargain. How come Castiel is still alive and kicking?"

Balthazar produced a nervous laughter. "I can't just kill him. He's human"

"That should make it easier" Crowley replied. "Just push him in front of a bus, or something"

"I'm not killing my brother" Balthazar said, with a little more fierce in his voice. "Just give me Kevin and the tablet and you'll get to live another day"

"Get it done and you'll get to live another day" Crowley answered threatening.

* * *

**Part 4**

Jo and Dean were waiting for Cas to come back, so they could leave. Sam was in another room, on his laptop, reading the online news papers to find out if anything out of the ordinary had happened.

Ellen was in yet another room, cleaning the weapons, while she was thinking of a reason to convince Jo to come home with her, instead of putting her life on the line when she went with Dean and Sam.

Their bags were packed, all they could do was wait until Cas came back. Sam walked out his room and joined Dean and Jo.

"I think I have something" he started. "In Cornell, Wisconsin. Woman tells the cops she saw her husband change into a grandfather's clock"

"Nice" Dean laughed. "You sure she's not crazy?"

"Could be" Sam admitted. "But it wouldn't hurt to check it out"

"Exactly how were you going to do that? Talk to Mr. Tick Tock?" Dean asked.

"I don't know, we'll see when we get there" Sam raised his hands.

"Okay" Dean nodded. "I'll call Cas to tell him he needs to hurry"

"I'll tell mom we're leaving soon" Jo said and she got up, the same time Ellen came into the room.

"The guns are ready" she said. "Jo, eh, we're going home. I don't want you to go with them" She looked over Jo's shoulder at Dean. "Don't take it personal. I just want to keep my daughter with me"

"Mom, we've been through this. I'm old enough to take care of myself" Jo said.

"May I remind you that it was only last week ago that you were shot?" Ellen fired back.

"You were with me, then" Jo replied.

"Are you saying I was responsible?" Ellen asked upset.

"No, that's not what I'm saying. I'm saying that…you can't always protect me" Jo explained.

"I can try" Ellen said fierce. "You're all I have, sweetheart. Is it really so hard to understand I don't want you to leave with these two magnets for evil?"

"No, I understand" Jo replied. "But I have to. Hunting evil, it's in my blood. Just like it was in dad's. Someone has to continue his work. Besides, these two morons" she pointed at Sam and Dean, "could use some female company"

"I can't change your mind, can I?" Ellen sighed.

"I will call you ever single day, I'll send emails, we'll Skype" Jo promised.

"If I don't hear from you in 27 hours, I'm calling the FBI" Ellen managed to make a joke.

* * *

**Part 5**

Anna was standing outside, waiting for Kevin to show up. She had called him and she knew he could hear her. So it was just a matter of time and good will until he answered her.

"I was wondering when you'd be reaching out" Kevin said from behind the angel. Anna quickly turned around.

"Do you know why I'm here?" she asked.

"I have a suspicion" Kevin replied. "Does it involve a tablet?"

"You can keep the tablet, but you can't stay with Crowley. It's dangerous. Whatever he promised you, he's lying about it. He's a demon, the moment you cease to be of use, you're dead. At least with us you have a chance on surviving" Anna reasoned. She made a step forward. "We can protect you"

"I don't need your protection" Kevin scoffed. "Not since I got the angel juice"

Anna shook her head. "Cas made a mistake giving up his powers. You have to give them back, or give them to me. You're not supposed to have them. You can't control them. They will consume you" she warned.

"No" Kevin said slowly. "I think you're scared, because I do know how to control them and you fear I might kill you. But you don't have to worry just yet; Crowley gave me the specific order of killing Meg and so that's what I'm going to do first"

He heard Crowley call him. "I have to go. Say hi to your friends" he added sarcastically.

* * *

**Part 6**

Cas opened the door of the motel and heard Dean sigh a relieved sigh.

"Took you long enough" he said, but he didn't sound annoyed. He sounded like he had been worried.

"I'm sorry" Cas responded. "I had to make sure Meg would be okay"

"And will she?" Sam asked with raised eyebrows.

"Yes" Cas nodded with a faint smile. "She's trying to make something of her life. She even has a job"

Dean, who had just taken a sip from his beer, choked. Cas frowned and walked towards him. "Are you alright, Dean?" "Yeah" Dean said difficult and coughed. "So, Meg has a job. As what?"

"As a call girl" Cas replied. Sam and Dean glared at each other. Cas was being way too optimistic to know exactly what a call girl was.

"Cas? Did Meg mention what she was going to do in her job?" Sam asked careful.

"Of course" Cas answered. "People will call her and then she will help them with their relationship problems"

"That's what she told you?" Dean asked disgusted.

"Yes. Why? Is that not what her job is about?" Cas asked suspicious.

"Not exactly" Sam commented cryptically.

"A call girl," Dean decided to put Cas out of his misery, "is like a prostitute" he saw Cas' face stiffen, "but unlike regular prostitutes, she meets her clients at their address"

Cas looked at Dean, but Dean felt like the ex-angel was staring right through him.

"So, technically, Meg's going to sleep around with several men to get paid?" he asked hurt.

* * *

**Part 7**

Meg was sitting in front of the mirror in the bathroom of Dorothy's apartment. She was putting up makeup when the door opened and a woman came in.

"Hi" she said as she walked towards her. "My name's Heather" she introduced herself and she pulled a chair and sat down. "I hear it's your first night. How are you feeling? Are you nervous?"

"No" Meg said. "Maybe, I don't know"

"You've had sex before, right?" Heather checked.

"Yeah, of course" Meg responded.

"Okay" Heather said relieved. "This is not the way to lose your virginity"

"Are you trying to give me some kind of pep talk?" Meg asked.

"Yes" Heather admitted. "And to give you this" She put something in Meg's hands. Meg looked at her hand which now held a white pill. "To get you through your first night"

"I take it it's not an aspirin" Meg commented sarcastically. She put the pill in her mouth and swallowed.

* * *

**Part 8**

Cas was pacing up and down. It couldn't be true. It just couldn't be. Meg would never… He sank down on the bed and went with his fingers through his hair. Dean went sitting next to him. "I'm sorry"

"Oh, shut up, you're not sorry" Cas snapped annoyed as he got of the bed and turned to Dean. "You are gloating on the inside"

"Hey, I do feel bad for you" Dean defended himself. "I know how you feel about her, but she clearly doesn't deserve you. And now you have all the more reason to come with us"

"I can't leave now!" Cas responded upset.

"What? Why not?" Sam, who had tried to stay out of the conversation, now asked.

"She's all alone. She doesn't know anyone" Cas answered obvious.

"Ten minutes ago you didn't seem to have any problems with that" Dean commented.

"Ten minutes ago I didn't know what she was up to" Cas explained. "This…job…it's dangerous. I don't want her anywhere near those men"

"Why don't you just admit you're jealous?" Dean replied annoyed.

Cas shook his head confused. "Why would I be jealous? I'm just concerned. She's my friend. I don't want anything bad happening to her. Just because you have to stick your dick in everything that wears a skirt, Dean Winchester, doesn't mean everyone has those needs" He stood and walked to the door.

"Where are you going?" Sam asked, though he already knew the answer.

"I'm going to stop her" Cas answered. He turned to Dean and looked sharp at him. "You don't have to wait for me" And he shut the door behind him.

* * *

**Part 9**

Cas kicked the door of Meg's motel room open. On his way he had tried to call her, but she wouldn't answer her phone and at first sight she wasn't here either.

"Meg!" Cas called. He received no response, so he checked the bathroom. She wasn't there. Cas glanced at the clock. 10:03 pm. She would probably be on her way to her first customer, whoever that was. He needed an address. He walked to the table, hoping there would be a little note on it.

But other than a dirty cup of coffee and a coffee stain, the table was empty. He walked to the dresser and opened all drawers. He searched and threw the content on the floor. Again nothing. He walked to the cupboard in the living room, opened it and looked.

When after looking through all closets, cupboard and drawers he still hadn't find any clue on Meg's whereabouts. Cas looked up at the ceiling.

"Anna! I know you can hear me! I need your help!" he yelled frustrated.

"What?" Anna asked short and Cas turned around.

"I'm looking for Meg. You have to help me find her" he said agitated.

"No" Anna refused. And before Cas could require an explanation, she gave one herself. "I know what Meg is up to. You realize she's going to have sex, right? She's not on a suicide mission. Stop being so jealous"

"But…" Cas began to object.

"I have to go" Anna cut him off. "I don't have time to deal with your human issues" She vanished and left Cas defeated.

Then he heard a sound and he turned in the direction of the sound. The garbage bin had capsized. Cas sighed and walked to it. He bent through his knees and picked up the garbage. There were lots of wrappers in it. Apparently Meg loved chocolate.

He threw the wrappers back in the bin, when he noticed something matt between the shiny material. He took a closer look at it and pulled the green paper from between the wrapper. He examined it, his eyes grew big and he scribbled up. Leaving the garbage for what it was he stormed out of the motel room.

* * *

**Part 10**

Meg pressed the bell of a big, fancy house. Whoever owned the place was eager to meet her, because Meg had barely withdraw her finger when the door opened.

"Good evening, you must be April" the man said. "Come in" He stepped aside and Meg entered. She took of her coat and the man swallowed. She was wearing a little black dress with a deep décolleté and the dress barely covered her butt.

"Eh…can I offer you a drink?" the man suggested.

"No" Meg refused. She wanted this to get over with. "Can we just get to it?"

"Yeah, of course" the man agreed. "My name is Brad, by the way" He turned around and led her to the bedroom. He closed the door behind her and then he walked towards her until he was only inches away. He cupped her face and kissed her. He lifted her from the ground and carried her to the bed.

Cas was running down the streets. He had considered taking a taxi, but he was not familiar with this kind of transport and he figured it would only be a waste of time. Fortunately he had crossed all streets of the United States when he was an angel and he remembered every single one of them.

Brad went with his hands underneath Meg's dress and took off her panties. Then he came back to her face and as he kissed her, he pulled her up so he could unzip the dress. Meg closed her eyes as Brad went inside her, after putting a condom around his cock.

Cas kicked the door open and ran inside the fancy house. Meg was nowhere to be seen, but there were noises from upstairs. The stairs was standing in the middle of the living room and Cas hurried towards it. He followed the groaning noises and slammed the bedroom door open.

A stranger was lying on top of Meg and his hips were moving in a rapid pace.

Cas ran towards the bed, grabbed Brad by his short, brown hair and pulled him off the bed.

"Cas!" Meg exclaimed and she quickly grabbed the sheet to cover her nudity.

Cas buried his fist in Brad's face and broke his nose. Then he aimed for his eye and punched.

"Stop it! You're going to kill him!" Meg screamed and she climbed out of bed, the sheets wrapped around her. Her left hand holding the sheets, she hurried to Cas. "Leave him alone!" she shouted and she pulled his arm. But Cas jerked his arm and pushed her away.

Though Meg didn't give any sign of being physically hurt, Cas let go of Brad and hurried to her.

"I'm so sorry. Are you okay?" Cas asked worried.

"Yeah" Meg answered. She accepted Cas' hand and the sheets fell off. Twelve seconds long they stared at each other, both having trouble breathing.

Then Cas exclaimed from pain and lost his balance. Meg caught him and they both fell on their knees. Brad looked down on him, blood running from his nose and a bloodstained paper-knife in his hands. Meg scribbled up and raced towards him. Brad, surprised by Meg's sudden attack, dropped the knife and staggered backwards.

Meg picked up the knife and drove it through his stomach. She pulled it out and stabbed again. She kept stabbing, until Brad fell on the ground and stopped moving.

* * *

Fall Out Boy: This ain't a scene, it's an arms race (4x01, Cas wakes up)Marianas Trench: Truth or dare (4x02, Cas goes talking to Meg)Breaking Benjamin: I will not bow (4x03, Crowley reminds Balthazar of the deal they made)Natalie Imbruglia: Come on home (4x04, Ellen tries to convince Jo to come home with her)Lifehouse: Cling and clatter (4x05, Anna tries talking to Kevin)My Chemical Romance: I don't love you (4x06, Dean tells Cas what Meg's job really is)Roxette: Easy way out (4x07, Meg prepares for her first customer)The Cary Brothers: Jealousy (4x08, Cas is going crazy)Dashboard Confessional: Screaming infidelities (4x09, Cas tries to find Meg)Athlete: The Getaway (4x10, Meg kills her first customer) 


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Heroin **

**Part 1**

Meg dropped the paper-knife and hurried back to Cas. He was still conscious, but he looked very pale and he had trouble keeping his eyes open. Meg slapped him softly in the face to make sure he wouldn't fall asleep.

"Get dressed" Anna said. She threw some clothes at Meg and then stepped to Cas. She bent through her knees and touched his forehead. "He's burning up again"

"He's getting sick again?" Meg asked, trying not to sound worried, while she put on the clothes Anna had given her.

Anna nodded. "Apparently human life is very hard for him. Seems like he can't take a lot" She looked up at Meg. "The sooner you take care of that wound, the better"

"Why can't I just take him to the hospital? He has legal papers" Meg objected.

"Because the two of you need to keep a low profile" Anna explained and she sounded a little nervous. "Kevin is after you and I don't trust Balthazar. I remember what he said when you were in prison and it's bugging me. Unfortunately I can't keep an eye on him 24/7" She put her hand on Cas' chest and then she did the same to Meg.

"Aaaahhh!" Meg gasped. "What did you do?"

"I made sure no angel can track you down any longer, including myself. This house now belongs to you. Don't ask any questions. All you have to know is that I took care of it" Anna explained. "You are on your own from now on"

* * *

**Part 2**

Cas scribbled up and walked to the bed where he sat down. Meg walked to him and also sat down. "Let me see" she said soft and she reached for the buttons on his shirt, but Cas pulled away.

"It's just a scratch" he objected.

"Don't be ridiculous" Meg replied and she opened the buttons. She shoved the shirt over his shoulders and then went sitting behind him so she could take a good look at the wound. "It's not that deep. I think I can stitch it myself" She stood from the bed and looked around. "If I were a needle and a thread, where would I be?" She took a deep breath. "Wait here, I'll be right back" She left the room.

Ten minutes later she came back with a needle, a thread and a bottle of alcohol. She walked to the bed and sat behind Cas. She opened the bottle and poured some of the drank of Cas' shoulder. Cas gasped and then clenched his teeth. Meg gave him the bottle and Cas drank. Meg prepared the needle and thread and then began to stitch.

"You have to sit still" Meg reproached Cas when he pulled his shoulders.

"Well, I'm sorry, it hurts" Cas snapped in defense. "Your lover boy tried to kill me"

"If you hadn't been here nothing would've happened" Meg fired back.

"You can't expect me to sit and wait at home while you're…screwing around with some random guy" Cas muttered.

"You weren't supposed to know" Meg replied a little frustrated. "You don't have the right to be jealous. I'm not your girlfriend" She finished the stitching. "I'm done"

Cas stood from the bed and turned to Meg.

"You and I…it really didn't mean anything to you, did it? I was just your…sex buddy" Cas realized bitter.

"I never lied to you about that. I told you I don't love you" Meg tried to defend herself. She walked to the door and walked past Cas. She turned to Cas. "You should get some rest"

She jerked her eyes off Cas' naked chest and walked away.

* * *

**Part 3**

Meg was lying asleep in a bed in one of the many bedrooms in the house. She had found something to sleep in; Anna really had taken care of it.

The door of the room opened slowly and Cas appeared in the doorway. He was wearing a dressing-gown and he walked slowly to the bed. He took of the dressing-gown and removed the sheets. The sudden change of temperature woke Meg up. She blinked and opened her eyes and widened them. Though it wasn't the first time she'd seen it, it still took her by surprise.

"What are you doing here?" she asked aggressive.

"I think you know that" Cas answered and he stepped in bed. He sat astride on Meg and leaned forward to kiss her.

"Get off me. I mean it" Meg mumbled, though she didn't sound like she meant it.

Cas ignored her and kissed her neck, while his hands searched underneath the sleeping-gown. Meg felt his fingers move rapidly on her most intimate spot and she let out a moan. Her breath went faster and faster and as her right hand pinched in Cas' chest, her left hand searched for his cock and began to stroke it.

Cas removed his hand and ripped Meg's sleeping-gown open, revealing her naked body. As his hands enveloped her breasts he penetrated inside her. His hips moved slowly at first to build up the tension. Then he moved faster and faster, causing Meg to scream from enjoyment, but right before he could lead both of them to the seventh heaven, Meg woke up with a shock. She was alone and she bathed in sweat.

Meg opened the door of Cas' bedroom and walked to the bed. She stepped inside the bed and lay still next to him, her face turned to him.

* * *

**Part 4**

The next morning.

Cas opened his eyes, hoping Meg would still be with him. But besides him, there was no one in the bed. It had been a rough night. His shoulder kept hurting, but he assumed that was normal. Maybe he should ask Meg if she could help him out.

He got out of bed and frowned. The pain had moved to his head.

"Cas? Are you up?" Meg called, before she appeared in the doorway. "What's…wrong?" she asked when Cas sat back down on the bed.

"I don't…I don't know" Cas responded.

"Are you in pain or something?" Meg asked a little irritated, while she walked to the bed. 'I don't know' wasn't going to help much.

"Isn't that obvious?" Cas snapped hostile. "Or are you really so stupid you can't see when someone is hurting?"

Meg frowned, confused and angry. "What the hell has gotten into you?"

Cas shook his head and frowned. "What were we just talking about?" he asked soft.

Meg took a step back. "Are you playing games with me? Or you really don't remember?"

He didn't answer, but stood from the bed and walked past Meg.

"Okay, that's it. I'm taking you to a hospital" Meg decided determined.

Cas rotated his head so quickly it surprised Meg he didn't snap his neck. "We can't go to a hospital! Anna said we need to keep a low profile!" he snapped angry. "Don't you ever listen, bitch?!"

Meg walked to him with fierce steps. "Don't ever call me that again" she hissed. She raised her hand to hit him, but right before she could Cas grabbed her hand and her opposite shoulder. He lifted her from the ground and threw her in the air. She landed against the wall next to the bed.

"Why are you lying on the ground?" Cas asked, sounding as if he really didn't know what he had just done. He walked towards her and helped her up.

"Put your clothes on" Meg commanded bitter. "We're going for a ride"

* * *

**Part 5**

Cas was sitting on the hospital table and the doctor was doing some basic examinations. Checking his eyes, checking his ears, checking his throat, taking his blood pressure, listening to his heart.

"Seems all very normal, Mr. Novak" Dr. Spencer said. "So, you're not feeling very well" he continued and he was going to say more, when Cas interrupted him.

"Do you think I'd be here if I were feeling good?" he snapped demeaning.

"Cas!" Meg hissed between her teeth. "Don't be such a jerk"

"We're not supposed to be here" Cas objected hostile. "Anna gave us the specific order not to go to the hospital"

"You don't have to do what she says. You can't let her boss you around like that" Meg fired back.

"I don't have a choice. She's my superior" Cas defended himself.

"Not anymore she isn't. Now she's just your big sis and you know what they say about little brothers. They're supposed to be a pain in the ass" Meg ended the discussion. She looked up at Dr. Spencer. "Do whatever it is you need to do"

A couple of minutes later a nurse came into the room, with a wheelchair.

"Céline, please take Mr. Novak for a few scans" Dr. Spencer ordered. Céline drove the wheelchair to Cas and she took his arm to help him, but Cas freed himself violently. "I don't need your help"

With a face to the ground he sat in the wheelchair and he looked at Meg as if she was sending him to the gallows. Céline drove the wheelchair out of the room and Dr. Spencer and Meg followed.

"Maybe you can wait here or get something to eat" Dr. Spencer suggested.

"I don't think I can eat right now" Meg replied.

Dr. Spencer nodded in understanding. "Then wait here"

"Where are you taking me?" they heard Cas protest. "Meg! Help me! They're taking me somewhere. Meg, where are you? You can't leave me. You can't let these freaks take me with them"

"Don't worry too much, Miss. I'm sure that whatever he has, we can cure it" Dr. Spencer added as Meg stared at the struggling Cas.

* * *

**Part 6**

Meg was still sitting on the same spot when Céline drove Cas back to her. He had lost the angry face, but he didn't look happy either.

"And? Did they find out what's wrong with you?" Meg asked a little annoyed, because Cas walked out of the wheelchair, to the wall and leaned against it.

"Ask the doc" Cas answered short.

"That bad?" Meg raised her eyebrows. And when the doctor joined them she turned to him. "What's the problem? What did you see on those…scans?"

"That is the problem. We didn't see anything" Dr. Spencer started.

"What?" Meg said stunned.

"We performed every scan possible and according to them Mr. Novak is completely healthy" Dr. Spencer continued.

"Then why is he acting so strange?" Meg wondered.

"We took a blood sample" Dr. Spencer said. "It can take a few days before we know the results"

Meg looked at Cas who had sunken on the floor and held his head in his hands. "Can you give him something for the pain?"

Dr. Spencer pressed his lips. "I'd rather not. As long as we don't know what's causing him this pain, I don't want to give him any medication. It could make everything worse"

"So, you just want him to suffer?" Meg replied. She didn't wait for Dr. Spencer to defend himself, but walked to Cas. "Come on, we're going home. They can't help us here"

"Told you we shouldn't have come here" Cas scoffed.

* * *

**Part 7**

Meg opened the door to their new house and threw the keys on the table. Cas hadn't said a word during the whole ride. Next to the house they had also gotten the car and somehow both Cas and Meg received their driving license.

"I'll see if I can make any dinner" Meg said tired.

"Why? Are you trying to poison me?" Cas asked accusatory. Meg didn't even bother answering that, but went to the kitchen.

Cas followed her. "What are you going to cook?" he asked, being his normal self now.

"I don't know" Meg shrugged. "I'll just throw a few things together"

"Did you ask the doctor to give me something?" Cas asked suddenly.

Meg chopped the carrots and threw them in a cooking pot. "Yeah, I did. But he didn't want to"

"Did you tell him how much I'm hurting?" Cas continued, starting to get angry again.

"Yes, but he said he didn't want to make it worse" Meg explained. She continued peeling potatoes.

"I don't believe you" Cas said slowly. "I think you're enjoying this. I think you're still a demon and that this whole 'I'm human and it sucks' thing is just an act to get closer to me so you can kill me"

"Well, congratulations, you've figured me out" Meg replied sarcastically.

"That's how it is, right? You are looking for a chance to kill me" Cas commented, being completely paranoid.

Meg pointed her knife at him. "I can kill you right now, if I want to"

"Go ahead" Cas replied and he spread his arms. Meg sighed and put the knife down. "You're so annoying" and she walked out of the kitchen.

"Hey, don't walk away from me!" Cas yelled furious and he grabbed the knife as he followed her. He aimed the knife and threw it at Meg, but he just missed. The knife landed in the wall, right next to Meg.

Meg shrieked and then turned around slowly, her heart beating painfully in her chest.

Cas stared at her with open mouth. "I'm..I'm so sorry… I didn't…" he stuttered as he walked to her. Meg pulled the knife out of the wall and pointed it once again at Cas.

"I don't know why I did that" Cas said breathless and trembling.

"Get away from me" Meg said threatening.

* * *

**Part 8**

Meg had locked the door of her bedroom and sat down, leaning against it. Cas was sitting on the other side of the door.

"Meg, I'm really sorry for what just happened" Cas said remorseful. "I don't know why I'm saying those things or doing those things. You know I'd never hurt you deliberately"

Meg let her head rest on her knees. She was going to kill Dean Winchester. This was his fault. He should've taken Cas with him. Then Cas could've taken his anger out on all the evil sons of a bitches out there.

"It's the pain" Cas tried to explain himself. "You don't know what it's like. It's like my insides are trying to rip themselves apart and it's like someone is constantly putting needles in my head"

That sure sounded painful. This could be the work of witches, Meg thought.

"Meg, you're the only one that can help me. Don't turn your back on me now" Cas begged. All of a sudden he gasped for air, gagged and vomited.

Meg opened the door and looked from the vomit to Cas. She bent through her knees, grabbed his shoulders and dragged him inside her room. She lay him on the bed as gentle as possible and then cleaned his face with a napkin.

She stood and wanted to leave, when Cas grabbed her arm. She reluctantly turned around, expecting Cas to lash out on her again.

But there was no fury on his face, just…hurt.

"You have to help me" he begged weak.

* * *

**Part 9**

Meg banged the door of Heather's studio. After what seemed like forever, the light in the hallway was switched on and Heather opened the door. She was wearing a grey dressing-gown, her hair was very messy and she rubbed her eyes.

"Meg? What are you doing here? Do you know what time it is?" Heather mumbled sleepy.

"I need your help. Can I come in?" Meg asked agitated and before Heather could decline she already entered. "You gave me something to get through my first night. It really helped and I was wondering…"

"If I have more? Of course I do, but couldn't you wait until morning? You can't be addicted" Heather responded a little grumpy.

"No, it's not for me" Meg quickly answered. "It's for my friend. He's sick and he's hurting"

"If he's sick, he needs to see a doctor" Heather commented dry.

"They can't help him. They say nothing's wrong with him, but I know that's not true" Meg replied. "Can't you give him something? Something to ease the pain?"

Heather shook her head. "Wait here. I'll get dressed"

Ten minutes later Heather came back, fully dressed and with a small briefcase in her hand.

"What's in it?" Meg asked nodding at the briefcase.

"No aspirins" Heather answered vague. She looked at Meg. "You owe me a favor and I will collect"

* * *

**Part 10**

Meg opened the door of her house and kicked it open. She walked carefully inside and switched the light on. Heather followed her.

Cas was standing next to the front door, the same knife clenched in his hand. He ran to Heather and jumped her.

Heather screamed and Meg quickly turned around.

"No, Cas, wait!" she yelled when Cas tried to stab Heather. "She's here to help you. She can make the pain go away"

Cas let go of Heather and stared suspicious at Meg. "You're lying" he said.

"The briefcase" Meg explained. "There's a medicine in it. Heather can help you. Please, let her" She took the knife out of Cas' hands.

"Let's go somewhere private" Heather suggested and she took Cas arm. She turned to Meg. "Don't disturb us. This could take a while"

Meg frowned a little. Why couldn't she stay with Cas? Why wasn't she allowed to know what Heather was going to give him? But then Heather smiled and explained. "I think I'm going to collect a lot sooner than I thought I was"

Meg watched Heather drag Cas along and Cas looked over his shoulder. "Where's she taking me?" he asked, slightly panicking.

"Just go with her. She will help you" Meg promised and so Cas walked along with Heather.

They entered his bedroom and Heather locked the door.

"You go sit on the bed" she ordered. Cas walked to the bed and sat down. Heather walked to him and sat next to him. She opened the briefcase and revealed a syringe, a small, rubber piper, a spoon, a lighter, a cloth, a piece of cotton, a bottle with an alcoholic liquid, a bottle of water and a tin box.

She took the cloth and the bottle. She opened the bottle and poured some of it on the cloth. Then she rolled up Cas' sleeve and cleaned the bend of his left arm. She tied the small, rubber pipe around his arm above the bend of his arm.

Heather took the bottle of water, opened it and sucked up 75 units with the syringe. She gave the syringe to Cas. "Hold this for me, please. It's just water, it won't do anything yet" she added, in case Cas was going to use it already.

She opened the box and took out a chunk. She placed it on the spoon and then took the syringe back from Cas. She squirted the water in the spoon, put her lighter on and held it underneath the spoon to dissolve it. She pulled the plunger out of the syringe and stirred the solution.

She took the cotton, ripped a small piece of it, rolled it into a ball and put it in the spoon. She then took the syringe, whole again, and placed it on the center of the cotton ball. She sucked up the solution and put the spoon on the pedestal cupboard.

"Give me your arm" she ordered. Cas stretch out his arm and Heather placed the syringe on his arm bend. She pulled it back slowly and noticed some blood. She then injected the heroin into his veins. She removed the syringe and put it back in the briefcase. She took of the rubber pipe and put all the stuff back in the briefcase.

"I feel sick" Cas muttered.

"That's normal. It's your first time" Heather explained. Cas rolled his eyes, gagged, turned to the side of the bed and vomited. Then he closed his eyes and fell back.

* * *

**Soundtrack**

Hurts: Exile (5x01, Anna handles the situation)The Pretty Reckless: Panic (5x02, Meg takes care of Cas)Taylor Swift: Treacherous (5x03, Meg dreams about Cas)Days Difference: Better skies (5x04, Cas is mean to Meg)Marina & The Diamonds: I'm not a robot (5x05, Cas sees a doctor)Ellie Goulding: I know you care (5x06, Dr. Spencer can't find what's wrong with Cas)Florence + The Machine: Kiss with a fist (5x07, Cas gets Meg almost killed)Augustana: Just stay here tonight (5x08, Cas begs Meg for help)Ben Howard: The Wolves (5x09, Meg gets helps) The Killers: Bones (5x10, Heather helps Cas) 


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6: Death Wish**

**Part 1**

Heather unlocked the door and looked at Meg who had been leaning against the door in an attempt to hear what they were doing.

"Did Cas throw up?" she asked, trying to sound casual.

"Yeah" Heather answered. "I'm going to need you to clean it up"

"Do I look like a maid to you?" Meg commented offended.

"Of course not, sweetie" Heather smiled weak and she caressed Meg's cheek. "A maid I would pay. Now, come on, be a doll" And she walked back into the room.

When Meg came back with a mob Heather had taken off her T-shirt and as Meg walked to the vomit spot Heather crawled into the bed and sat astride on Cas. She opened the buttons of his shirt, making Meg stop cleaning.

"What are you doing?" she asked suspicious.

Heather sighed and rolled her eyes. Then she managed to produce a smirk and turned her head to Meg. "Collecting, of course"

"But…" Meg stammered. She frowned a little frustrated and waved at Cas. "He's not even awake. You can't do this"

"Oh, he's awake" Heather said hoarse as she kissed Cas' chest. "He's in some kind of rush. He doesn't really care about what's happening around him"

"Meg?" Cas mumbled weak.

"What the hell did you give him?" Meg wanted to know.

"Something to take the pain away, like you asked" Heather responded, irritated that Meg was still in the room.

Meg's eye fell on the briefcase and she wanted to pick it up and open it. However, Heather noticed what she was up to and she climbed off Cas. She jerked the briefcase out of Meg's hands and dragged Meg to the door.

"I think you've seen enough" Heather said sharp. "Go do something. Maybe you can dye your hair again, because, no offense, sweetie, but the blonde? Not your color"

She opened the door and pushed Meg outside.

* * *

**Part 2**

The next morning.

Cas opened the door of his bedroom and saw Meg sitting on the floor, sleeping. He bent through his knees and picked her up. He carried her through the hallway and walked into her room. There he lay her down on the bed and covered her with the sheets.

He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. Then he turned around and left, going back to his room. He took the sheets and rolled them in a ball, taking them downstairs to the laundry. He had no idea how to work with a washer, but there was a manual, so maybe if he'd read extra careful, he might figure it out.

It took him five minutes to read the entire manual. He put the sheets in the washer, pressed a few buttons and the washer started spinning.

Meg woke up from the noise. She looked around, wondering how she got where she was. She could only assume Cas had brought her here. She swung her legs off the bed and walked to the door.

"Cas?" she called sleepy. She walked to the stairs and went downstairs. There were noises in the kitchen too and so she entered the kitchen.

She wasn't sure what she was seeing.

"What are you doing?" she asked suspicious. Cas turned around and smiled. It was the first time in a long time.

"I'm making breakfast" he responded. "I remember you making waffles for me and I thought I could try and return you the favor" he added as he stirred the dough.

"I didn't know you could make waffles" Meg said surprised.

"Oh, I can't" Cas commented. "I mean, I couldn't. But I read a recipe in a cookbook and now I know how to do it"

"By reading the recipe once?" Meg asked raising her eyebrows.

"Yeah" Cas shrugged.

"And what's that noise?" Meg asked, pointing her thumb over her shoulder.

"That's the laundry" Cas answered.

"Since when do you do laundry?" Meg wondered.

"Since I read the manual" Cas explained. "Besides, they're my sheets, I made them dirty"

"With Heathers help" Meg muttered. "How, eh,…how was it?"

"How was it to be completely numb, having a complete stranger banging me, while there was nothing I could do about it?" Cas replied sarcastically. "Great. It was great"

As the dough was rising Cas walked to the table and sat down.

"You don't have the right to be jealous" he said sharp. "I'm not your boyfriend"

* * *

**Part 3**

Meg took a bite from the waffle and frowned. "Did you put chocolate in it?" she asked, looking up at Cas.

"Yeah, Anna told me you liked it as a human and since you're human again…" Cas explained. "I wanted to do something nice for you"

"Hmm" Meg said, taking another bite from her waffle. "Seems to me that you're trying to make up for something"

Cas bit his lip and took Meg's hand. "Yeah, I've been…quite a jerk to you yesterday. But…the pain…it was really bad" he tried to explain.

Meg pulled her hand away. "Yeah, I get it" she answered a little shrill. "You couldn't think straight"

"Exactly"

"We still need to know what caused that pain, in case it comes back" Meg said.

"I don't think it will come back" Cas commented, suddenly becoming tensed and he stood. "And even if it did I can still ask Heather to help me again"

"Heather? What happened to 'a complete stranger'?" Meg asked slowly and suspicious. Cas pulled his shoulders.

"Is it so bad for me to call her by her first name?" he wanted to know.

"You don't know her" Meg reasoned. "And she's a hooker"

"Last time I checked, so are you" Cas fired back. "But here I am, making you chocolate waffles"

Meg stood too and placed her hands on the table.

"Okay, say you need another dose of her medicine. What if she wants to sleep with you again?" she asked, making it sound like that would be the worst thing in the world that could happen.

"Then I guess I will" Cas replied careless. "You let guys screw you for money. And I'll let Heather screw me for my life"

"What did she give you? What was the medicine?" Meg demanded to know.

"I have no idea" Cas smiled. "But whatever it was, it's good stuff"

* * *

**Part 4**

"What was it?" Meg asked sharp, forcing Cas to look at her by grabbing his shoulders. "What did Heather give you? If it's something dangerous…You know medicine can kill you, don't you? If you take too much of it"

Cas freed himself and turned around. "Yes, I know that. I am not stupid" he snapped, while he rubbed his fingers. "I don't know what Heather gave me. All I know is that the pain is gone and isn't that exactly what we wanted?"

"Well, if you don't know then I guess I'll have to ask someone who does" Meg replied cold. She turned around and wanted to leave the kitchen when Cas gripped her arm.

"No, wait" he said quickly. "There was a syringe. She injected me with something"

"With what?" Meg asked, getting angry now. She hated Cas for being so secretive to her.

"I don't know!" Cas exclaimed. He hated Meg for not believing him. Right after that he grabbed his head and groaned.

"What's the matter?" Meg frowned.

"The pain. It's back" Cas explained moaning. He looked up at Meg. "You have to call Heather and tell her to come as soon as possible"

Meg stared at Cas for a full minute, then slowly shook her head. "No" she replied softly and she staggered backwards. "I am not calling Heather. Not until I know what the hell she gave you" she ended, sounding a little terrified.

"What?" Cas said. "You can't do this. I'm dying here. You have to call her"

Meg shook her head again, heavy this time. She ran out of the kitchen, grabbed her purse and keys on her way to the front door and rushed outside.

Cas tried to open the door, but found it locked. "Meg! Open the door! Open the door now!" he shouted, banging on the door. "Let me out of here! Meg, when you come back, I swear I will kill you!" he yelled, as he kept banging the door.

* * *

**Part 5**

Meg took a few deep breaths in order to remain calm, before she rang the bell on Heather's door. This time her co-worker was dressed when she opened the door.

"Don't tell me your friend is sick again" she said as she let Meg in.

"Depends" Meg started vague. "He's having a headache and he's acting weird. Again. Still"

Heather shrugged. "Those are side effects. Every medicine has a side effect or two" she explained careless.

"What did you give him?" Meg asked.

"Does it matter?" Heather commented, avoiding Meg's look.

"He threatened to kill me if I didn't call you" Meg continued.

"Why'd you have to call me?" Heather asked curious.

"He says he needs another dose of whatever it was you gave him" Meg replied, still trying to stay calm. She had to restrain herself from approaching Heather and strangle her. Something Heather could see and a smile appeared on her face.

"And you think that if he wants a new dose, he's going to have to sleep with me again" she said slowly.

"Cas can sleep with whoever he wants to" Meg responded, trying to sound casual. "I just want him to be careful…We're…friends"

Heather scoffed. "Sure, sweetie, whatever gets you through the night"

"You're not going to tell me what it was, are you?" Meg realized.

"No" Heather answered. "You'd better go now. If Cas is acting weird, you shouldn't leave him alone too long"

* * *

**Part 6**

Cas stroke his hair and tried to keep his breathing under control. Meg didn't understand. He needed more. He had lied about the pain being back, but he hadn't lied about needing another dose. He opened the upper buttons of his shirt, suddenly feeling feverish.

He hurried to the dresser and opened all drawers and cupboard doors. He searched through them, checking all boxes, finding nothing. He slammed everything shut and began to rub his fingers again.

"If I were a medicine cabinet, where would I be?" Cas mumbled trembling and out of breath. He ran to the stairs and sprinted upstairs. He went to the bathroom and opened the mirror cupboard.

"Got it" he said, sighing relieved and he grabbed all boxes that had medicines in it. He took out all the strips and swallowed the pills one by one.

He leaned against the cold, marble wall and sank down on the floor. He closed his eyes and fell asleep.

* * *

**Part 7**

Meg opened the door of Heather's house and walked outside. She turned around and looked Heather sharp in the eyes. "If something happens to Cas, because of what you gave him,…" She couldn't find a threat that was frightening enough.

"Mm-hm" Heather nodded, her lips pressed. "But you're just friends" she commented sarcastically. Meg rolled her eyes and walked away, while Heather went back inside.

"Hey, Meg!"

Meg gasped as she recognized the voice. Would he really dare attacking her in the middle of the day, in the middle of a crowded street?

"It's not very nice to ignore someone who's calling you" Kevin continued. "And it's very stupid when that someone is much more powerful than you…unless you have a death wish, of course"

Meg turned around and faced him, noticing a gun in his right hand.

"What, no angel juju?" she asked sarcastically.

"Oh, I have plenty" Kevin responded. "Crowley wanted me to use this instead"

"And life just isn't complete if you can't kiss Crowley's ass" Meg commented sarcastically.

Kevin lifted the gun and aimed it at Meg's face. "Watch your tongue. That's my mentor you're talking about"

"He's a demon who's manipulating you!" Meg exclaimed. "If he really cares for you why doesn't he let you go? Why is he keeping you away from your family?"

Kevin shook his head. "He's not keeping me away from my family. I get to see them every single day"

"How many tablets have you decoded? Yes, I know there's more than one" Meg jumped on another subject. "You realize that as soon as Crowley doesn't need you anymore, you'll be dead, right?"

"If I were you, Meggy, I'd stop worrying about my life," Kevin said as he aimed the gun at Meg's belly, "and start worrying about yours" and he pulled the trigger.

* * *

**Part 8**

Cas eyes flashed open as he lay on the bathroom floor. With some effort he managed to sit up. He looked aside to the ground and noticed the many empty strips. He picked up a few and examined them.

"What?" he mumbled weak and confused. It had never been his intention to swallow every pill in the medicine cabinet and he knew that it was a miracle he was still alive. He let the strips fall out of his hand and he crawled slowly and difficult to the toilet.

As he tried to reach the toilet he was thrown back against the wall. A part of him tried to keep the drugs in his body. But another part wanted to live. He jerked himself off the wall and dragged himself to the toilet. He clenched his fingers tightly around the edge, while he leaned backwards. It was as if an invisible force tried to stop Cas from getting any closer, but he managed to lean forward. He put his finger in his mouth as deep as possible, until he gagged and threw up.

When he was finished he leaned backwards again and wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his shirt.

Then, without a warning, he bashed his head against the toilet.

* * *

**Part 9**

Alarmed by the blast Heather shoved the curtains in her living room aside. "Oh my God" she said shocked as she saw Meg's body lying on the street. She ran outside, while she searched for her phone. When she realize she didn't have it on her, she signed at a few passengers. "Don't just stand there like some kind of idiots. Call 911!" she yelled angry.

She kneeled next to Meg and lifted her T-shirt. She turned away and covered her mouth. There was an awful lot of blood.

Five minutes later the ambulance was driving to the hospital. Heather searched through Meg's purse and conjured her phone. She dialed Meg's home number, so she could inform Cas. But there was no reply. After trying four times Heather put the phone back and searched for Meg's keys. When they arrived at the hospital, Heather jumped out of the car and called for a taxi.

She didn't bother ringing or knocking. She inserted the key in the lock and opened the door.

"Cas? Cas, where are you? Something happened to Meg. Someone shot her" she called. But no one answered and so she searched the house. The ground floor was clean and thus she ran upstairs to check all rooms.

"Cas?" she shouted again, before she opened the bathroom door. She bulged her eyes at the scene she just walked into.

Various empty medicine strips lay across the floor, there was vomit in the toilet and blood on the wall Cas lay against.

Heather hurried to him and lay her fingers in his neck to check if he was still alive. He was, but barely. She ran back downstairs and rushed to the phone to call 911.

* * *

**Part 10**

The door to the intensive care opened by itself and an instant later it closed again. Balthazar became visible and stepped slowly to the bed Cas was lying in. There was a bandage around his head, and some kind of masker around his nose and mouth, attached to a ventilation device.

"I am so sorry, Castiel" Balthazar whispered as he lay his hand on the machine. "But I have no choice"

"What are you doing?" Anna asked sharp. Without turning around Balthazar mumbled: "Please, leave, Anna. I have to do this. Crowley will kill me if I don't"

Anna walked to him with fierce steps. "If you kill Cas, I will kill you" she threatened trembling, yet determined.

This time Balthazar turned to the ginger angel. "You wouldn't. You can't kill me. There are too little of us left. You need me" he said, trying to call her bluff.

"I am much better off alone than to have a traitor by my side" Anna replied bitter. She took a deep breath and made another few steps closer to Balthazar. "If you stay in Heaven you will be protected from any demon"

"Then what? Stay hidden forever? You can't kill Crowley" Balthazar snapped. "I don't want to be on the run forever"

"Kill Cas and you will be" Anna responded furious. "And you won't be able to hide from me"

"I'll take my chances" Balthazar replied and he turned around. He turned the machines off and as Anna screamed "No!" he vanished.

* * *

**Soundtrack**

Halestorm: Dirty work (6x01, Heather collects her prize)Bat For Lashes: Trophy (6x02, Cas makes Meg breakfast)Tegan&Sara: I'm not your hero (6x03, Meg tried to find out what Heather gave Cas)Within Temptation: Caged(6x04, Cas is getting aggressive)Breaking Benjamin: Dance with the Devil tonight (6x05, Kevin tries to kill Meg)Three Days Grace: It's all over (6x06, Cas searches the house for medicine)The Rasmus: Friends don't do like that (6x07, Meg asks Heather a few questions)Garbage: Control (6x08, Cas forces himself to throw up)Garbage: Fix me now (6x09, Heather finds Cas)Flyleaf: Fire, fire, fire (6x10, Anna busts Balthazar) 


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: Guardian Angel**

**Part 1**

One week later.

Heather was sitting by Meg's bed. A week had gone by and Meg hadn't opened her eyes once. The doctor had told her she was not in a coma, but just fast asleep. She would live. It was just a matter of time before she woke up.

Cas was less lucky. Someone had tried to kill him again, but fortunately there was a camera in the room and so the doctors could interfere just in time. Heather couldn't help but wonder if keeping Cas alive wasn't just extension of execution.

She felt something soft and cold on her arm and she looked down to see Meg's finger moving.

"Meg?" she said.

Meg's eyelids moved and slowly, but surely she opened them.

"Welcome back" Heather sighed relieved.

Meg tried to sit upright, but Heather gently pushed her down again.

"Careful" she said. "I'll go get a doctor" She hurried to the door and walked outside to call a doctor.

* * *

**Part 2**

Doctor Tyson did some standard examinations, while Heather looked from the doctor to Meg, waiting for him to say something.

"I think you have been very lucky, Miss Masters" he eventually said. "A little more to the left and you might not have made it"

"When can she go home?" Heather asked.

"I'd like to keep her here in observation for at least the rest of the week" Doctor Tyson. Meg frowned and shook her head.

"No" she mumbled weak. "I have to call Cas" She tried to get out of bed, but Heather stopped her.

"Don't worry, I'll take care of it" she said and she signed at Doctor Tyson, who followed her to the door.

"She's talking about Cas Novak" Heather explained. "How is he doing?"

"Not good. He's under Doctor Spencer's surveillance" Doctor Tyson answered. Heather glanced at Meg who stared suspicious back at them.

"I'll fill her in" she said.

"Alright" Doctor Tyson agreed. "I'll get a nurse to change Miss Masters bandage" He opened the door and almost bumped into a woman. "Excuse me"

"I heard Miss Masters is awake. I need to ask her a few questions" the woman said, showing her ID. "Don't worry, I'll make it quick" she added and she walked into the room.

"Isabel?" Heather exclaimed when she saw Inspector Roberts walking to the bed. "What are you doing here?"

"Doing my job" Isabel answered cold. "Miss Masters was shot. I'm here to find out who did it"

She pulled a chair and took a notebook. "Now, Miss Masters, tell me everything you know"

Meg closed her eyes and leaned back in the pillows.

"Can't you come back some other time?" Heather asked. "Can't you see she's exhausted?"

"I will do this" Isabel said sharp. "And if you have a problem with that I'd rather have you waiting outside"

Meg frowned and opened her eyes again.

"Kevin" she said hoarse.

Isabel rotated her head back to Meg. "What did you say?"

"It was Kevin" Meg repeated. "Kevin Tran"

* * *

**Part 3**

"I will come back. I need to ask Castiel a few questions too, but as long as he's on intensive care…" Isabel didn't finish her sentence. She stood, walked to the door and left.

"What is she talking about?" Meg asked urgent at Heather. "What is Cas doing on intensive care?"

Heather took a deep breath. This was going to be really hard, 'cause even though Meg would never admit it, it was obvious she cared deeply for her…friend, as she called him.

"Meg, I need you to listen very carefully" Heather started softly. "Something happened to Cas. When you were brought to the hospital I tried to call him, but he didn't answer the phone and so I took your keys and went to your house. I found him in the bathroom. He was in bad shape, Meg. I think someone bashed his head against the toilet edge. He has been in a coma since then"

Meg swallowed and nodded. As if on automatic she threw the sheets off and slowly swung her legs off the bed.

"I have to go see him" she said numb.

"You can't" Heather shook her head and she took Meg's shoulders.

"Let go of me, Heather" Meg said in a normal tone.

"No" Heather replied determined as she tightened her grip. "You need to sit back down and take five seconds to calm down"

Meg sat back down and looked furious at Heather. "1, 2, 3, 4, 5" she counted fast and she stood up again. "Can I go see him now?" She tried to pass Heather again, but the latter grabbed her by her shoulders again. "Goddamn it, Heather, let go of me!" Meg yelled furious and she struggled and wrestled to free herself, trying to hit her colleague.

"You can't!" Heather exclaimed and Meg startled at the volume of Heather's voice. "Someone tried to kill him when he was already on the ICU. They won't let you in. There's police guarding him"

"I have to see him" Meg repeated determined. It seemed she hadn't heard anything Heather had said.

"Alright" Heather gave in and she let go of Meg. "Alright"

* * *

**Part 4**

Isabel braced herself before she opened the door to the police station. She hadn't been here since the slaughtering a few weeks ago. Her superior had sent her on a vacation.

"Isabel, what are you doing here?" a man asked, as he looked up from his desk.

"Hi, Victor" Isabel greeted the man and she smiled weak. "I'm just…picking up a few things I forgot. Personal stuff" she explained as she walked to her office.

"Why didn't you give us a call. We would've sent someone" Victor commented.

"I wanted to save you the trouble" Isabel shrugged and she entered her office. She walked to her desk, which was usually very tidy, but now magnified pictures lay across the oak-wood bureau. Isabel quickly collected them and put them in her bag. Underneath the pictures there was a brown folder. She opened it and read Cas' name on top. "Gotcha" she said soft and she put the folder in her bag too. She walked to the door and left. She quickly walked through the aisle, smiling and nodding at a few random people.

"Was that Roberts?" another woman asked sharp. "What was she doing here?"

"She had to pick up a few personal things" Victor explained. "What's wrong?" he asked as the woman turned around and hurried to the office Isabel had just left.

* * *

**Part 5**

Heather supported Meg as they walked to the ICU. As soon as they headed for the door, the guard stepped closer to them.

"I cannot let you pass" he said strict. "Not unless you're close family"

Meg looked desperate at Heather who pulled her shoulders. Meg looked back at the guard. She couldn't believe what she was going to say, but she did anyway.

"I'm his girlfriend"

"Five minutes" the guard said and he opened the door. Heather let go of Meg; she knew she had to stay outside. The guard closed the door behind Meg and Heather walked to the wall and leaned against it.

Meg shuffled to the bed Cas was lying in. His body was attached to all kinds of machines. She had never seen him so helpless. Why had she left him alone? Why did she have to go to Heather? What had it gotten her? Nothing, except a shot wound and Cas being beaten to death. Tears filled her eyes, but she forced them back and swallowed to remove the crop in her throat.

She took his hand and produced a faint smile. "If this was a movie, you'd pinch my hand now" she said softly. "Unless it's Snow White or Sleeping Beauty and I have to kiss you back to life. I think you would like that" she smirked nervous. "Or maybe it's Beauty and the Beast and I have to tell you I love you…Which is never going to happen, because I don't love you"

She sounded like she tried to convince herself more than Cas. "See what's happening? I'm rattling about stupid fairytales" she said, looking up at Cas' pale face. "You have to wake up. I'm going insane without you"

The door opened and the guard appeared. "Time's up"

"Just give me a second" Meg replied. She took off her necklace and put it in Cas' hand. She bowed her head to his ear. "So you'll know I was here" she whispered, before she turned around and left Cas alone.

* * *

**Part 6**

Meg staggered to the wall and stuck out her hand to find support. She let herself fall against the wall and sank down.

"He's just lying there. He's not responding to anything I say" she mumbled breathless. "When I find out who did this to him- and I will find out- I'm going to torture that bastard to death" She looked aside at Heather. "I want to help inspector Roberts"

"Okay, I think I know how to find her" Heather replied.

"And…someone has to call the Winchesters" Meg continued. "They're his…family…If he…" Meg couldn't get herself to finish. "They need to know"

"Don't worry, I'll take care of it" Heather promised. "You have a phone number?"

"In my purse" Meg answered and she wanted to get up.

"I got it" Heather said quickly. She ran back to Meg's room and found her purse on the chair next to the bed. She searched it and pulled out her phone. She turned it on and searched through her contacts. When she found Dean she dialed his number.

"Hello?" a male, husky voice said.

"Dean Winchester?" Heather checked.

"Yeah"

"This is Heather" Heather started. "I'm a friend of Meg's. She asked me to call you and your brother"

"What for?" Dean asked suspicious. Sam frowned, wanting to know who was calling and for what reason.

"It's about Cas" Heather explained.

Silence.

"Sir, are you still there?"

"Hang on, let me put you on speaker" Dean eventually answered. He put his phone on speaker so Sam and Jo could listen along. "What did you say about Cas?"

"He's dying" Heather cut to the chase. "Someone made an extremely violent attempt to take his life and it looks like they're getting their way"

"No, they're not" Dean commented. "Tell Meg we're on our way back" He hung up, spun the car around and drove in the opposite direction.

* * *

**Part 7**

"Miss Masters?"

Meg looked up and saw Doctor Spencer coming her way. She scribbled up.

"Can I talk with you for a moment?" he asked and he sounded deadly serious. Meg followed him to an empty room and he waved at a chair. Meg sat down and so did Doctor Spencer.

"We checked Mr. Novak's blood. The sample I took last week. We couldn't find anything" Doctor Spencer began. Meg knew there was more to come, or else he wouldn't have taken her apart. "However, the lab has examined his blood again after he was brought in last week. And this time they found a small amount of heroin in his blood"

"What?" Meg said breathless.

"Miss Masters, there is a chance that it wasn't an assault" Doctor Spencer continued.

"Are you telling me Cas did this to himself?" Meg exclaimed trembling.

"No, the drugs did it" Doctor Spencer explained. "And it wasn't just drugs. I was in your house. There were empty medicine strips. I think it would be wise to get him some help if he wakes up"

"When he wakes up" Meg snapped at the doctor. She got up from the chair and left the room, just in time to see Heather walk to her.

"I called them. They're on their way" she said. Meg lifted her hand and slapped her in the face. "What?..."

"How could you?" Meg asked shaking from head to toe. "Heroin? I ask you to help him and you give him drugs?"

"Meg, I'm sorry. You were desperate and I really wanted to help him" Heather tried to defend herself.

"You didn't seem so concerned when you were screwing him" Meg shouted. "You almost killed him! If he dies, it's on you. I'll tell the cops what you did"

"Please, Meg, we can talk about this" Heather begged. But Meg shook her head. "Get out. I don't want to see you here ever again"

Heather realized there was no room for discussion. "I'm really sorry, Meg" she sobbed, before she turned around and headed for the exit.

* * *

**Part 8**

Dean drove full speed ahead.

"Dean, slow down" Sam said urgent. "Do you really think this is a good idea?"

"Kidding me?" Dean snarled at the younger Winchester. "I should've never left him alone with that demon"

"Ex-demon" Sam corrected him.

"Doesn't matter" Dean snapped. "Once a murderer, always a murderer"

"Don't you think that's a little hypocrite?" Sam commented. "We've killed, too"

"Monsters, Sammy. We kill monsters. We safe people" Dean fired back. "We leave town for a little more than a week and Cas ends up in the ICU. You think that's coincidence? He can't take care of himself and I left him with a demon!"

"Ex-demon!" Sam repeated.

"Will you stop defending the whore?" Dean shouted angry. He inhaled deeply through his nose. "When we're back, Cas will move back in with us. Or we'll move in with him. Whatever he prefers. Either way, I'm not letting him alone with that demon again"

He pushed the accelerator pedal and drove even faster.

* * *

**Part 9**

Heather walked inside the police station. She was going to talk to inspector Roberts. Maybe she could help her find that Kevin guy.

"Can I help you?" a woman asked. Heather turned around and frowned confused. She had spent a lot of days at the station, but this woman she had never seen before.

"I'm looking for inspector Roberts" Heather said.

"Inspector Roberts?" the woman repeated with raised eyebrows. "Who's asking?"

"I'm her cousin" Heather confessed.

"I see" the woman nodded in understanding. "Why don't you follow me?" She led Heather to her office.

"What are you doing in Isabel's office?" Heather asked confused, after the door was closed.

"Inspector Roberts doesn't work here anymore" the woman clarified. "She got fired a couple of weeks ago"

"What? Why? What happened?"

"Cliff note version? She screwed up" the woman answered. "If you see her, tell her to give back what she stole"

Heather shook her head confused. "She stole something? Like what?"

"Evidence" the woman responded. "She stole everything concerning Castiel Novak. Tell your cousin to give it back"

* * *

**Part 10**

Meg had returned to her spot on the floor opposite the ICU room Cas was in. She heard footsteps coming their way and she averted her head to right. A young girl with wavy, blonde hair, green eyes and thin lips walked towards them. She didn't say a word, but turned to the guard.

"You should go and eat something" she said sharp and the guardian left.

Meg widened her eyes. "Hey, what are you up to?" she asked when the girl put the latch down and opened the door. She reached out her hand to Meg. "Get up. I want you to witness this miracle" Meg accepted her hand and let the girl pull her inside the room.

"Okay, before I do what I was sent here for, there is something really important I have to tell you" the girl told. "I cannot go into details, but I can tell you this. Cas is really, really sick. Every mean thing he says, every evil thing he does, he's not doing it on purpose. You have to remember that. Can you do that?"

Meg nodded fierce. She had no idea what was going on, but she promised quietly that she would stand by Cas no matter what happened.

"Good" the girl said. She walked to the bed and touched Cas' forehead. She turned to Meg. "He's not healed yet. I only gave him his life force back. It shouldn't take long before he wakes up" she guaranteed Meg, before she left her alone.

Meg came closer to the bed and lay her hand on his chest. She felt Cas' chest going up and down and his heart started to beat faster.

"Cas?"

Cas slowly opened his eyes a little and he clenched Meg's necklace in his hand.

* * *

Soundtrack

Andrew Belle: Open your eyes (7x01, Meg wakes up)Anberlin: Said too much (7x02, Isabel wants to ask Meg a few questions)Paramore: Hello, cold world (7x03, Heather tells Meg about Cas)White Lies: Black Song (7x04, Isabel steals Cas' file)Noah Gundersen: The Ocean (7x05, Meg gets to see Cas)Switchfoot: Congrete Girl (7x06, Heather calls Dean and Sam)Flyleaf: Called you out (7x07, Meg finds out about the heroin)The Birthday Massacre: The long way home (7x08, Dean and Sam have an argument)We the Kings: Don't speak, liar (7x09, Heather finds out about Isabel)The Raveonettes: The Enemy (7x10, Cas wakes up_)_


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8: The Ferris Wheel**

**Part 1**

Cas opened his eyes and rolled them to left. Meg was sitting next to his bed. He looked down and noticed he was holding something in his hand. He rolled his eyes to the right and saw the machines and the perfusion leading some kind of fluid medication into his veins. He frowned and tried to pull all threads out of his body.

"No, Cas, don't do that" Meg tried to stop him. "You have to get better"

Meg didn't understand. Medication or drugs was what triggered it. He wasn't himself when he took them.

Cas opened his mouth to explain, but something entirely different was said.

"Get out"

Wait, why did he say that? That's not what he meant to tell.

"What?" Meg asked, to make she'd heard Cas correctly.

"Get out" Cas repeated unwillingly. "I don't want to see you anymore. You are the reason I am here. You brought Heather to me. You're the reason I almost died"

No! No, don't listen to what I'm saying!, Cas thought desperately. If only Meg could read his mind.

"I should've gone with Dean and Sam and Jo" Cas continued heartless, but as he saw Meg's eyes go wet, he felt tears coming up in his own.

Meg swallowed and forced the tears back. She was not going to cry. Not now, not when Cas was being so horrible to her.

"Fine, then I'll go" she finally reacted. "The Winchesters are on their way back. You won't see me again, but before I leave you, you should remember this. When those men attacked you, it was me who took care of you. When the pain was driving you insane, it was me who looked for a way to redeem you. And I'm the one who stayed here until you woke up. I don't expect you to be thankful, but I won't allow you to forget it either"

She stood and turned around. Cas took her hand, accidentally dropping the necklace. Meg was right, about everything. And he was grateful, more than grateful. He wanted to tell her that. Come on, Cas, just three little words, that's all. You can do it.

"I…hate you" he mumbled resentful.

Meg jerked her hand and walked out of the room.

* * *

**Part 2**

As she walked outside she bumped into Dean. "Oh, you're back" she noticed indifferent. "He's awake" she filled the brothers in. "He's your problem now. I'm out" She pushed Sam aside and walked away.

"Are we allowed to go in?" Sam wondered, pointing at the door. "I mean, all of us?"

"Why don't you two go first, then I'll go find Meg" Jo suggested.

"Why?" Dean asked.

"Because she seems upset" Jo answered obvious.

"So?" Dean shrugged uncaring. Jo rolled her eyes. "Some guys…" she muttered between her teeth, before taking off.

Dean opened the door and closed it again when they both had entered. Cas was awake. Dean pulled a chair and put it next to the bed, sitting down on it, while Sam went sitting opposite Dean.

"What the hell happened, man?" Dean asked soft. Cas tried to lift his head, but it hurt too much. "Hang on" Sam said. He got up and searched for the remote control. He pushed one of the buttons and the head of the bed was lifted.

"It's Meg's fault" Cas explained difficult. "It's all her fault. Her friend gave me heroin. It messed me up. I did things I didn't want to. I almost killed myself"

Dean glared at Sam for a second, before responding. "I should've never left. I should've known something like this would happen eventually"

"I told her to leave and never come back" Cas replied.

"That's good. That's really good" Dean commented. "You should come with us. As soon as you're capable of"

"I will" Cas agreed.

Dean moved his feet and felt something under his shoe. He looked down and saw the necklace. He bowed and picked it up. "What's this?"

Meg's necklace. She gave it to me, but I dropped it. Give it back to me, Cas thought.

"It's Meg's" he said.

"Oh" Dean replied. "Then I guess you won't mind if I toss it in the garbage"

No! Don't throw it away!

"Yeah, go ahead" Cas responded. Dean put it in his pocket, with the intention of tossing it in the garbage outside.

* * *

**Part 3**

Meg was hiding in the guest rest room of the hospital. She should be resting, but first she needed to calm down. Who the hell did Cas think he was to lash out on her like that. He had begged her to get help. What was she supposed to do? Let him suffer? Thinking of it now, she realized she should've done exactly that.

"Have you heard anything I said last night?"

Meg looked up in the mirror and saw the reflection of the young girl that had practically saved Cas' life.

"I told you he's sick" the girl said.

"In his head, right" Meg snapped, without turning around.

"Exactly" the girl replied. "I told you not to listen to any mean thing he says or does"

"Well, I'm having a little trouble with that" Meg hissed. She turned the tap open, so she wouldn't have to listen to the girl anymore.

"I know it's hard when you love someone and they're pushing you away" the girl responded, as she closed the tap and stared strongly at Meg. "But no matter how hard he pushes, you can't leave him"

She walked backwards to the door.

"You're wrong" Meg eventually said. "I do not love him"

The girl smiled. "Yes, you do" she replied. "You just won't allow yourself to admit it"

Leaving Meg a little astonished, the girl left the rest room.

* * *

**Part 4**

Jo caught Meg sitting on the rest room floor, her head on her knees. Jo had never thought it possible, but for a moment she took pity on the former demon.

Meg looked up the moment Jo made a step towards her.

"Who was that?" Jo asked, referring to the other blonde girl.

"Some chick who thinks she has all the answers to all the questions" Meg answered while she got up, using the wall as support. She frowned and lay her hand on her side. Kevin had hit her on the exact same spot he had attacked her with the angel powers.

"You okay? You need a doctor?" Jo asked.

Meg shook her head. "No, eh, I need to go home" she mumbled. "I have to pack Cas' bags"

"I can drive you" Jo offered. "Then I can help you pack his bags and bring them to him. Then you won't have to see him anymore…if that's what you want"

"It is" Meg answered.

"Don't forget your promise, Meg" the young girl's voice whispered in Meg's ear.

"Shut up. I didn't make any promises" Meg hissed.

"Who are you talking to?" Jo frowned.

"No one" Meg answered fast. "Let's get out of here"

* * *

**Part 5**

Balthazar looked around. He was standing on an open field, after he had been summoned.

"Did you come alone? Or should I expect that bossy ginger to pop up, too?" Kevin shouted.

"What do you need me for?" Balthazar wanted to know.

"The question is, what do you need me for" Kevin commented. "See, I have been watching you trying to waste Castiel and I have seen you fail over and over again. Well, your methods suck, even you have to admit that"

"I'm not really in the mood for an analysis of how much I suck at killing my brother" Balthazar replied, slightly sarcastic.

"That's because you don't really want to kill him, because you still think of him as family" Kevin said manipulative. "But there's one thing you forget. Castiel gave up his powers, to save a human being. He abandoned his family to save something as insignificant as a human. He's not your brother anymore. He's one of the many bugs on our planet. You have to kill him. And I have to kill Meg, which brings me to the reason why I brought you here"

"Can you hurry? I'm getting a little bored here" Balthazar commented.

"We should work together. See, if I can get Meg, I can use her to lure Ca stiel and then you can kill him" Kevin continued. He seemed to be really pleased with himself.

"And how am I supposed to kill Cas?" Balthazar said, still trying to talk his way out of the deal.

"Oh, that is entirely up to you" Kevin smiled malicious. "Either way, tonight an angel will die"

* * *

**Part 6**

Sam and Dean had gone to the cafeteria of the hospital to get a quick bite, before they returned to Cas.

In the meantime Cas had time to regret his words. He wished he hadn't sent Meg away, he wished he hadn't given permission to get rid of the necklace, he wished he could pull out all threads on his body, so they'd stop making him crazy.

"Do I look like a genie to you?"

Cas looked up. "Who are you?"

"I think you know that" the girl said secretive. "Let me give you a hint. Your girlfriend Meg once gave me a cassette tape. She told me to play it on your wedding day. And then everyone could hear how Meg gave you a blowjob"

Cas widened his eyes. That was impossible!

"Alexia?"

"Hello, uncle Cas" Alexia greeted him.

"How did you? I mean, last time…" Cas stammered surprised.

"Yeah, well, they needed me and so they made me a few years older" Alexia explained.

"They?" Cas asked confused.

"Yeah, they. Up there. Your former bosses" Alexia answered. "Either way, with my parents gone and aunty Daphne being killed, they figured someone had to take care of me. And they needed me now, not in ten years"

"Why? What business do you have with them?" Cas wanted to know now.

Alexia didn't answer right away, as she was looking for a way to tell him.

"Remember when I said I knew you're a good person? And at the court, when I said you were an angel?"

"Yeah"

"Those where things I knew by looking inside your heart" Alexia continued. "It's one of my abilities as a prophet"

"You're a prophet?" Cas exclaimed.

"You shouldn't be able to react like that" Alexia noted. "You shouldn't even be able to talk"

She's on to something, Cas thought hopeful, please, keep guessing.

"You need to get of the medication" Alexia realized and she pulled all threads out of Cas' body.

"What did you do that for?" Cas asked angry. "How am I supposed to get better now?"

"You'll get better if you stay away from the meds" Alexia promised, before she disappeared.

* * *

**Part 7**

Jo and Meg were in Cas' room, packing Cas' bags. Meg threw all his stuff in the bags, but Jo pulled them out again.

"You have to fold them or they'll never fit in" Jo reproached her. Actually she was just trying to buy some time. "You know, I really thought something was going on between the two of you"

"Why? Because we both turned human at the same time? I hate him for that" Meg replied.

"I think you just hate the fact that you can't shut off your emotions now" Jo said wisely.

"Why are you doing this? I killed you and your mom. Why are you trying to help me?" Meg suddenly asked suspicious.

Jo zipped the bags. "You think I have a secret agenda. Maybe I do. See, as much as I love Cas, I don't want him to go with us. Because when he's around, my chances with Dean are very slim"

"Maybe you should reconsider Dean's sexual orientation" Meg joked.

"And maybe you should reconsider your decision" Jo commented, lifting one of the bags.

"I've made up my mind" Meg said determined.

"Okay, then" Jo said disappointed. She lifted the bags over her shoulders. She wouldn't let Meg carry them, since she was still injured.

Jo put the bags in the Impala and walked back to the house.

"I'm sure Cas didn't mean what he said. He doesn't hate you" she tried one last time.

"It doesn't matter" Meg said sharp. "He can go to Hell for all I care"

Jo cast her a sympathetic glance and turned around. Meg watched her drive away, when someone grabbed her from behind and covered her mouth.

* * *

**Part 8**

Now that Alexia had cut off his meds, Cas was feeling much better, though he still wasn't able to get out of bed. He heard the sound of wings and an instant later Balthazar appeared in the room. He wanted to ask what he was doing there, but found himself unable to. So he just cast him a quizzical look.

"You have to meet me at Butterfield Park" Balthazar said. "Crowley wants me to kill you and that's exactly what I'm going to do"

Cas frowned. Why would Balthazar tell him this? Why not just kill him right now?.

"If I kill you here and now, it wouldn't be a fair fight" Balthazar answered Cas' unspoken question. He reached out his hand and touched Cas' forehead.

"You're not completely healed yet. I simply reduced your head trauma to a general headache. You'll find yourself able to move and talk again within a few minutes" Balthazar said. "We have Meg. Kevin is going to end her life. She'll be at Butterfield Park as well, so I suggest you show up as soon as possible. Alone"

And before Cas could say or do anything to stop him, Balthazar fled.

* * *

**Part 9**

Cas climbed out of bed and stormed out of the door, colliding to Dean.

"Sorry" he mumbled agitated and he tried to pass, but Dean grabbed his arms.

"What the hell are you doing out of bed?" he asked reproaching.

"Kevin" Cas explained breathless. "He's going to kill Meg, unless I stop him"

"I thought you hated her" Sam frowned confused.

Cas shook his head. "No. I don't know why I said that. I didn't mean it" He tried to free himself, but Dean seemed to be much stronger. "Why won't you let me go?"

"Kevin works for Crowley, which means there's a big chance they are using Meg to lure you out" Dean answered accenting.

"I know it's a setup" Cas replied nervous. "Balthazar told me he was going to kill me at Butterfield Park and that they had Meg. If I don't show up, she'll die"

"And if you do show up, you will both be dead" Dean snapped. "Are you really willing to risk your life for a demon?"

This time Cas couldn't restrain himself and he punched Dean in his face. Dean, too stunned to react, looked at Sam for help.

"If you really think you should go, then let us come with you. As backup" Sam suggested. But Cas didn't want that.

"I have to come alone. I'm not risking Meg's life by bringing the two of you" he answered trembling.

"You are not going. I will lock you up if I have to" Dean threatened.

"Cas!"

They turned around and saw Jo running their way. She had a bag with her. She had heard their discussion along the way and she gave the bag to Cas. "Get dressed"

Cas accepted the bag and went back inside. As he put on some clothes he discovered something else in the bag. He picked it up and recognized it as the key of the Impala. Jo was offering him a way out.

When after ten minutes Cas still hadn't come out, Dean became suspicious. He opened the door to find the room empty and the window open.

"You have to be kidding me" Dean mumbled.

* * *

**Part 10**

Butterfield Park.

Night had replaced the day and the only light came from a Ferris wheel, standing in the middle of the park, next to the swimming pool. At the top of the Ferris wheel some of the chairs were removed, just enough to make room for a human body.

Meg was tied up on the rails, facing the starless sky. Kevin had grabbed her and taken her here, while Balthazar put something on the Ferris wheel. Something slippery. So, even if Cas came to her rescue, he'd hit the bottom of the wheel before he'd reach the top and then Meg would be stuck there, until she starved to death or died from cold.

Don't be so stupid, Meg reproached herself. You're not going to die on a stupid Ferris wheel.

Come to think of it, Kevin and Balthazar weren't really trying very hard. How big was the chance that they would succeed with this plan?

Cas parked the Impala on the grass of the park, left the key in and stepped out.

"Meg!" he shouted.

"Cas!" Meg responded.

Cas rotated his head to the sound of Meg's voice and ran to the Ferris wheel. Without thinking he grabbed one of the bars and pulled himself up. He almost let go as the bars were very slippery and at the same time the Ferris wheel started shaking.

Meg screamed. She hadn't seen this one coming. Ferris wheel coming alive. Apparently it was Kevin and Balty's plan to make the wheel collapse and Cas and Meg would be crushed underneath it. Strange plan, but Meg feared they might be able to pull it off.

"Don't be afraid. I'll get you off this thing" Cas yelled as he carefully climbed up, trying not to make the wheel move too much.

While Cas was on his way up, Meg tried to untie her hands. By the time Cas had reached her her hands were loose. She sat up to untie her feet and then threw her arms around Cas' neck. She pulled up her legs and Cas climbed on the spot she had just lied on. The wheel was shaking dangerously heavy and both knew climbing down was no option.

Cas looked down at the swimming pool and Meg knew what he was thinking.

"Cas, no" she said soft.

"We have no choice" Cas replied and he carefully stood on top of the wheel, trying not to fall backwards. Meg tightened her grip on Cas as he jumped off the wheel and into the water.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9: I want to play a game**

**Part 1**

Cas and Meg reached the surface of the pool and Meg held her breath. She had forgotten how good Cas looked when he was all…wet. Cas took advantage of her inability to speak.

"I'm really sorry for everything I've said to you today" he began. "I never meant to say those things. I was thinking something, but what came out was the exact opposite. And then Balthazar said he and Kevin had put up a plan to kill you and I knew it was a setup, but I just had to come"

"Doesn't matter" Meg said fast. "Let's get out of here" she suggested. She freed herself and swum to the edge, climbing out of the pool, while Cas did the same.

"We should get you some dry clothes, before you get sick" Cas said concerned. Meg raised her eyebrows.

"Before _I_ get sick?" she asked ironic. She followed Cas, who was heading to the Impala. When he wanted to open the door Meg took his arm and forced him to turn around. She stood on her toes and kissed him.

"For saving me" she winked. She grabbed him by his shirt with her left hand and with her right hand she opened the door to the backseat.

"Get in" she ordered. Cas, who knew what she was up to, eagerly obeyed and got in the car, while Meg took off her T-shirt and got in the car, too.

While Meg pulled off Cas' shirt, Cas let his hands slide over the length of her back. They unclothed each other until they were both naked.

Meg climbed on his lap and kissed him passionately. Cas placed his hands on both her sides and massaged the skin there, while he let his hands go down.

Meg took him inside her and put her hands on the seats, next to Cas' head. She moved her hips forward and pinched her nails in the leather of the seat.

Cas bowed his head and kissed the cavity in Meg's clavicle, while his hands searched their way up to her breasts.

"I love you" he panted.

"Shut up" Meg panted as well. "Don't ruin it now" she added hoarse as she led them both to the climax.

"I love you" Cas repeated softly.

* * *

**Part 2**

The next morning.

Meg lay with her head on Cas chest, when the car started vibrating. "Cas" she whispered. "Cas, wake up. There's someone in the car"

Cas opened his eyes and saw a silhouette. He quietly gave Meg his shirt and he put on his trousers. "Dean?" he asked, though he knew it wasn't Dean.

"No" the driver replied.

"Kevin!" Meg panted. "What are you doing? Are you going to try and kill us again?"

"No" Kevin answered. "Listen, I'm sorry for trying to kill you, but I promise I had good reason. Crowley had to think I was on his side. Ever wondered why I didn't hit you in the head or the heart?"

"Where are you taking us?" Cas wanted to know.

"To the tablets" Kevin said. "Well, not directly. They're guarded by demons and hellhounds and other things"

"And how are we supposed to get them?" Meg asked snappy.

"Have you ever seen the Saw series?" Kevin asked.

"Yes" Meg answered. "No" Cas replied at the same time.

"It's a little like that" Kevin continued vaguely. He parked the Impala in front of an abandoned building. "When you open the door, you will find two bags. You each take one of them. You will also see two doors. That's where you have to split up. There's not enough time to stay together. I can only keep Crowley away for so long"

"Why can't you just use your angel powers to get the tablets" Meg asked confused.

"I'm the one who set the traps" Kevin explained. "Crowley expects me to take you here, and he expects you won't make it through the maze. Don't let him be right. You have to be out before Crowley returns, for he will kill you himself"

"Oh, so, no pressure there" Meg scoffed.

"Now, listen careful" Kevin said. "In every room you will find a message on where you can find the tablet"

He stepped out of the car and opened the door to the backseat. Cas and Meg stepped out unwillingly. "Start walking" he ordered. Cas and Meg walked to the door and Cas opened it.

"Go on" Kevin said and he pushed Cas inside, Meg being next. Kevin closed the door and locked it. Meg slowly looked around the room and saw the bags. She poked Cas and pointed at the bags. Cas walked to them and picked them up, handing one to Meg.

"You think it's wise to split up?" Cas asked.

"No" Meg shook her head. "This is Kevin. He's tried to kill me three times. I don't trust him"

"Ssshhh" Cas hissed.

"What?" Meg hissed back.

"You hear that?" Cas whispered.

"What?" Meg asked nervous.

"Growling" Cas answered. They listened carefully and could hear clear growling and claws scraping over the floor.

"Hellhounds" Meg realized as she saw long, white lines appearing on the floor. She put her hand on the latch of the door on the right side, while Cas did the same on the door on the right. "I'll see you outside"

They opened the doors at the same time, entered the next room and shut the door, just in time to avoid the claws and canines of the hellhounds.

* * *

**Part 3**

The room was pitch dark.

"Meg?" Cas called, though he knew better. He touched for the wall and tried to let his eyes get used to the darkness.

Then suddenly a flash blinded his eyes and he shut them. The darkness returned and Cas opened his eyes.

"You're not going to find what you're looking for, with your eyes closed" a voice whispered. Cas understood he had to keep his eyes open at all cost and so when the next flash of light came he tried to keep his eyes open.

The light remained for about five seconds and Cas saw something rectangle and dark on the ground. When the lights disappeared he tried to remember the tablet's position.

The room where Meg was in was not dark at all and there were three tablets on the other side of the room. Piece of cake, so to speak. But the moment Meg took one step forward, ghastly screams were heard. Meg put her hands over her ears and bent on her knees, crying herself. As she felt blood coming out of her ears, she saw blood streaming over the walls as well.

"Fuck you, Crowley" she panted and she started crawling forward to the other side of the room.

When she'd reached it she used the wall to pull herself up. She picked up the tablets and put them in her bag one by one. She opened the next door and entered the following room.

* * *

**Part 4**

The next room had some kind of pool with dark blue water and Meg had to cross the water to reach the door on the other side. She looked around to find Kevin's message. She found it on the wall, next to the door. She read it and shivered. The tablets were hidden at the bottom of the pool. Meg could swim, that wasn't the problem. But the water would probably be ice cold and you could bet there was going to be something in the water, ready to attack her.

However, since she didn't have any time to waste, she stretched her arms and dived into the water. She was right; the water was ice cold. She swum to the bottom and picked up the two tablets, lying there. She swum back to the surface, when she felt sharp teeth in her leg. She looked down and saw some kind of demonic fish biting her leg. She pulled out one of the tablets and hit the fish on its ugly head. She swum further when somehow the pool began to close.

The entire area of Cas' next room was covered with burning coals and according to Kevin's message, there were three tablets buried underneath the coals. Cas swallowed, before he reluctantly put his bare feet on the coals. He felt the flesh on his skin burning away slowly as he tried to dig as fast as possible.

It took him at least ten long, painful minutes, in which he tried not to scream of pain. When he collected all three tablets, he crawled through the coals until he reached the door. He opened it and pulled himself out of the coals.

* * *

**Part 5**

The next room was filled with fragments of mirrors and the closest fragment had something written on it. Cas made a step forwards and squeezed his eyes to read the tiny letters. It said: 'Use the reflections in the fragments to find the two tablets.

"Great. Piece of cake" Cas mumbled sarcastic.

The fragments were very close to each other and so Cas lifted his left arm to protect his face, while the fragments cut in his sides, his shoulders, his legs, his arms and his chest.

He stopped after a few yards and carefully put his arm down. He examined the fragments around him, trying not to touch them; his hands were hurting immensely.

One of the reflections made him turn to his right and cut his way through to the first tablet in the room. He bent through his knees, the sharp edges piercing his flesh, and he put the tablet in the bag. Kevin must've done something with the bag, because it didn't seem to get heavier.

Cas looked at the fragments around him and learned the second tablet was close to the door at the other side. Leaving a trail of blood he shuffled through the fragments to the door. He found the second tablet and put it in the bag.

He stood up, careless for just a second and felt a sharp, stinging pain in the right side of his neck. He had managed to stab himself with one of the fragments. Blood streaming over his neck and shoulder he used the reflection as a guide to help him pull out the fragment. When he had done so, blood flowed out of his neck, splattering on the mirrors and the floor.

Cas pressed his hurting hand against his neck and reached for the door.

Meg's room had some kind of web, made of average looking threads. However, the moment she touched one of the threads an electric shock flowed through her body. There was only one tablet in the room, in the center.

Meg took off Cas' shirt and used it to lift the thread in front of her. She maneuvered her body alongside the electric threads, unable to avoid all shock. Meg felt like she was playing Operation with her as the tweezers.

Meg figured the best way to get to the tablet was if she stayed low to the floor. So she ducked, after putting the shirt back on, and lay herself on the floor. She dragged herself forward while the threads burned through the shirt and ruined her hair. She reached the tablet and put it in the bag. Then she dragged herself to the end of the room.

* * *

**Part 6**

The next room, which was also the last, led both players to what looked like a workshop. They were standing on some kind of balcony and Meg walked closer to the edge to get a better look at the people down there, when she heard a weird noise. She turned around to see Cas stumbling out of the other room.

"Oh my God" she gasped and she ran towards him. Without thinking she took off the shirt again, allowing Cas to see the scars on her skin.

"Press this against the wound" she said. Cas, too weakened to protest, did what she told him. "Follow me" she took his free hand and pulled him along to the stairs. Assuming something would happen if they were caught Meg tried to be extra quiet.

But it wasn't the sound of their footsteps that gave them away.

"Do you smell that?" one of the workers said, sniffing.

"Crap, they're fucking vampires" Meg hissed. She let go of Cas and took his bag with tablets. "Look for a door, a window, anything to get us out" she ordered and her voice skipped from fear as the vampires came closer to them.

She waved the bags in the vampire's face, causing it to growl and trying to cut her with its claws.

"Okay, that didn't work. I think I just pissed him off" Meg panted. "Cas, help me out here"

"We have to go back" Cas said difficult.

"What?" Meg replied upset.

"We're taking your way" Cas decided. There was no way he was walking on hot coals again or cutting his flesh.

"Alright" Meg agreed and they ran to the door she had just closed. She opened it and they entered. "Be careful. There's electricity on the threads" she warned.

Trying to avoid the threads and ignore the pain when they received a shock, they reached the door and opened it.

"The water is-"

Cas jumped into the water, to ease the burning pain.

"-cold" Meg finished and she dived into the water. "We have to swim fast. There are fishes in the water and I'm not talking about Nemo. Also, there's a platform that shoves over the surface, so unless you want to change into Wrinklestilskin, I'd say hurry"

Cas let go of the shirt and took one of the bags Meg was carrying, to lighten her burden.

They reached the other side, climbed out of the water and opened the door.

"What is this place?" Cas whispered.

"Ssshh" Meg hissed. "Cover your ears. Don't listen to anything but my voice, alright?"

Cas nodded.

"Okay, let's do this" Meg said.

She took a step forward and the screams were heard again, but this time they didn't have such an impact on Meg.

She heard a thump and Cas crying through the screams.

"Don't listen to it!" she yelled. She grabbed his shoulder and forced him to stand on his feet. She took his face in her hands. "We're almost there. If we reach that door, we're safe. And we have the tablets. We almost made it. Don't let some fucking banshee hold you back now"

She felt Cas nodding and she guided him to the other side of the room, opening the door.

"Wait" she said nervous and she stuck out her hand to stop Cas. She listened carefully. "Do you hear anything?" she whispered.

"No" Cas whispered back.

"Okay, be quick" Meg said. They rushed to the door, opened it and reclaimed their freedom.

* * *

**Part 7**

The Impala was still parked on the same spot. Meg walked around the car and opened the trunk. She opened one of Cas' bags and pulled out the first shirt she got her hands on. "Get in the car" she told Cas. "No, passenger seat" she added, when Cas wanted to step inside the driver's seat. "You can't drive like that"

She put herself behind the wheel. "I'm surprised you can drive at all" she mumbled.

"I can't" Cas replied. He leaned backwards and closed his eyes.

"Keys?" Meg said to herself, looking at the connection. "Keys" she answered her own question as she saw the key was still in the connection. She turned the key, started the car and pushed the accelerator pedal.

Blood flowed over the seats and Cas became paler and paler within minutes. Meg ignored all red lights and traffic signs, until she reached the hospital.

"I think it's time you get a subscription for this" Meg said sarcastic. She stopped the car, took the key and put it in her pocket. She opened her door and walked around the car to open Cas' door. She put his arm around her shoulder and dragged him out of the car. She kicked the door shut and then dragged Cas to the entrance of the hospital.

* * *

**Part 8**

Dean stared at his car, his mouth wide open, unable to speak.

"What?" he said shocked. "Baby, what have they done to you?"

"Dean" Sam said, elbowing him and pointing at the entrance of the hospital. Meg came outside and walked towards.

"I saw you two from the window" she explained.

"Why are you wearing Cas' clothes?" Sam asked.

"Long story" Meg replied.

"And what the hell did you and Cas do with my car?" Dean demanded to know, though part of him wished she wouldn't answer. Unfortunately she did.

"We fucked" Meg said smug. The look on Dean's face was priceless. "And Cas bled on the front seat. Speaking of Cas, he's fine. Thanks for asking"

Dean had the courtesy to look ashamed.

"Eh, yeah, I just wanted to ask" he mumbled.

"Follow me" Meg said. "I'll explain everything inside"

* * *

**Part 9**

Anna and Kevin were in the building Zoey had kept Cas hostage. It was sealed and trespassing would be penalized, but human laws didn't exactly apply to the angel and the prophet.

"You have the tablets" Anna concluded.

"Not all of them" Kevin corrected her. "Just the most valuable once"

"I have to say you're quite of an actor" Anna said, with some admiration in her voice.

"It wasn't all acting" Kevin replied. "In the beginning I thought Crowley really meant the best for me. I believed him when he said he was looking out for my mother. But then I wanted to see her again and he arranged that"

"How did that change your mind?" Anna asked.

"The woman I saw wasn't my mother. She looked like my mother, she sounded like my mother, but I knew she wasn't my mother. She's dead. Crowley killed her. Or his demons did it for him" Kevin explained.

"I'm sorry to hear that, Kevin" Anna said soft and remorseful. "But I'm glad to know you've set your priorities straight"

"Do you still want me to give up the angel powers?" Kevin wanted to know.

"No" Anna answered serious. "When Crowley finds out you double crossed him, he will end you. The more power you have, the better. In the meantime you have to keep pretending you're still his ally. I know it's risky and I understand if you want out, but-"

"I'll do it" Kevin interrupted the angel. "I'll stay close to Crowley and report to you whenever I can. But you have to keep in mind that if you're planning on destroying Crowley, you better act fast. Because as soon as he claims the powers Castiel promised him, he'll be undefeatable"

"Duly noted" Anna responded.

* * *

**Part 10**

Cas was sitting up in his hospital bed. There was a bandage around his neck and his hands and feet were bandaged. Dean, Sam, Jo and Meg were sitting around the bed.

"This picture is starting to get too familiar" Cas said grumpy. He lifted up his hand and tried to scratch his neck, but didn't really succeed.

Meg took his hand and cast him an approaching look.

"What? It itches. You didn't get stabbed by a piece of a mirror" Cas muttered.

"Don't be such a baby" Meg reproached him.

"I almost died in that maze" Cas defended himself upset.

"So did I, but you don't hear me complaining" Meg fired back.

"You know this is your fault" Cas said. "If you hadn't left Kevin wouldn't have taken you and you wouldn't have been tied up on that Ferris wheel"

Meg's mouth dropped open in amazement.

"Are you serious? You sent me away. You blamed me for your drugs accident and now you blame me again? What is wrong with you?" she exclaimed. She wanted to say more, when all of a sudden she became very pale. She held her hand against her stomach.

"Are you okay?" Cas asked soft and regretting his immature attitude.

Meg didn't answer, but ran inside the bathroom.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10: Truth or Dare**

**Part 1**

Dean opened the door of Cas and Meg's house and whistled when he entered the fancy hallway. "Wow" he said. "You sure you don't need an extra room mate to fill in the space?"

"We have plenty bedrooms" Cas replied. Dean turned around and raised his eyebrows. "I was joking"

"Oh" Cas said soft, looking away. He felt something soft in his back and stepped aside; Sam was passing through with his luggage.

"Where can I drop these?" he asked, lifting the bags.

"Here" Cas answered. He tried to scratch his neck again, but Dean grabbed his hand. "Aaahh!" Cas exclaimed and he jerked his hand.

"Suits you right" Dean commented inexorable. "Stay off of it"

Cas crossed his arms and pouted, reminding Dean of his behavior when he had just turned human.

"Can I do something to make you feel better? I can make you some dinner, or maybe order something" he suggested.

Cas shook his head. "No, I'm not hungry" he said, trying to sound thankful.

"You want us to call Meg?" Sam asked and Dean cast him an irritated glance. Why bring her up? But as Dean saw the look on Cas' face he knew Sam had hit the nail on the head. Cas, who felt Dean's judging eyes on him, looked down.

Sam took his phone and dialed Meg's number.

* * *

**Part 2**

Meg had stayed behind in the hospital after Jo had advised her to get a checkup. She wasn't injured like Cas, but she had still been in ice cold water and she had been in contact with electricity. So, a checkup wouldn't hurt.

The doctor draw some blood.

"How long have you been feeling sick?" he asked.

"Since now, really" Meg answered in full honesty. "One moment I'm feeling fine, the next I'm running off to the bathroom, puking my guts out"

"Do you get stressed easy?" the doctor asked.

"No" Meg responded. "I don't know. I'm not really familiar with emotions"

"What were you doing right before you became sick?" the doctor asked, trying to help.

"I was arguing" Meg confessed and the memory of it, made her tears go wet. She really didn't get Cas anymore. First he tells her he loves her and then he blames her for all the bad things that happen in his life.

She jumped up when her phone buzzed. She pulled it out and picked up when she saw Sam's name on the screen.

"Yeah?" she said and she dried her eyes.

"Meg, hi" Sam started, feeling a little awkward. "I was wondering…When are you getting home?"

"Why? Is there something to get home to?" Meg replied bitter.

"If you're talking about how Cas treated you in the hospital," Sam glanced at Cas, who looked up by hearing his name, "he really regrets that. He does nothing but sulking, so please, just get here"

Silence, while Meg was thinking about it.

"If Cas wants me to come home," she eventually responded, "then the coward is going to have to ask me himself"

She hung up and turned her phone off.

* * *

**Part 3**

Crowley had summoned Kevin and since Kevin couldn't give up his disguise he responded.

"Something wrong?" Kevin asked when seeing Crowley's strange expression.

"Depends" Crowley started. "You tell me, how is it possible that two ordinary people go through a maze of traps and get out alive?"

Kevin pulled his shoulders. "I don't know. I guess they have a high threshold for pain. Maybe you should ask your vampire buddies why they let them escape"

"Maybe" Crowley admitted. "But I also think you're not being quite honest. Something you have to tell me? Like how you don't seem to succeed in killing Meg? You haven't been talking to the Winchesters, have you? Because that would break my daddy heart"

"No" Kevin denied fast. "I don't have time to chat with anyone. I'm too busy trying to eliminate Meg Masters"

"So, if I tell you to get the tablets back ASAP, I can trust you will?" Crowley asked.

"Of course" Kevin replied, trying to keep a straight face, praying Crowley couldn't read minds.

* * *

**Part 4**

Cas glanced at the clock on the wall. An hour had gone by and they hadn't heard from Jo or Meg.

"I'm sorry, buddy" Dean said, a little too chipper. Cas shot him a furious look and Dean swallowed. "Maybe if you just get some sleep, then I'll take care of dinner. And don't come up with the 'I can't eat, when Meg's not around' crap. You have to eat"

Cas shrugged wearily. "Fine, then, if you insist" he mumbled and he stood. When he walked around the table he quickly bagged Sam's phone, which Sam had left on the table.

He took the phone to his room and put it on the cupboard. He tried to dial Meg's number, but pressed all the wrong numbers.

"Goddamn it!" he cursed and he smashed the phone against the wall.

"Did you hear that?" Dean asked alarmed, looking at Sam.

Cas' eyes bulged and he held his stomach as he fell on his knees.

Dean opened the door and ran to Cas, who was convulsing on the floor and screaming. He kneeled and held Cas' shoulders . Cas opened his eyes and begged without speaking.

"Can you come over and give me a hand?" he asked Sam, who came to them and helped Dean carry Cas to the bed. The pain had left as sudden as it had appeared and he was now sleeping.

"We need to do something about that" Sam said.

"You think?" Dean replied sarcastically. "The doctor said he's healthy, so it has to be something supernatural"

"It could be Crowley" Sam suggested.

"I don't think even Crowley has the power to do that" Dean commented doubtful. He frowned frustrated. "Wait here" he said after a few seconds.

He went downstairs and came back with a glass of water.

"Water?" Sam frowned.

"I added some painkillers" Dean explained.

"Are you sure that's smart?" Sam asked doubtful. "By the way, I thought Cas had taken all the medication there was in this house"

"He did" Dean confirmed. "This is what the doctor gave me, before we left the hospital. He said he didn't trust Cas with it"

"Right he was" Sam sighed.

* * *

**Part 5**

Half an hour later Cas opened his eyes and saw Sam and Dean staring at him. He looked away from them, embarrassed that he had once again passed out. He put his hands on the mattress and pushed himself up. He frowned a little and Dean walked to him. He took the glass and helped him drink it. Cas pulled a face and coughed.

"I put something in it" Dean explained. "To kill the pain"

Cas wanted to protest, when they heard the door shot.

"Jo" Dean guessed. "I'll go. You stay here" he told Sam.

Dean went downstairs and saw Jo sitting on the dresser.

"Where've you been?" he asked worried.

"I was with Meg, you know that" Jo replied. "She wasn't feeling very well and I offered to stay with her"

"Why would you do that? You don't have to be nice to her. She killed you" Dean responded disbelieving. "You don't owe her anything"

"I am not dead" Jo pointed out. "I'm sorry. I know it's hard to understand, but Meg is all alone in a strange world. She's not used to being human and I can't just let her go through that alone"

Dean shook his head. "I don't want you to spend so much time with her. I don't trust her. She's a demon. She will earn your trust and then stab you in the back"

Jo jumped off the dresser and gave Dean a sharp look.

"Well, maybe if you wouldn't spend so much time with Cas, I wouldn't have to hang out with an ex-demon"

* * *

**Part 6**

"I can't do this anymore" Kevin said agitated. He looked around him as if he expected Crowley to pop up any minute. "He knows I have something up my sleeve. He knows I've been talking to the wrong people. Well, not the wrong people, but you know what I mean"

"I sure do" Anna replied calm. "It's a bummer, but not completely unexpected. I suggest you stay here with the tablets until the coast is clear"

"How long is that?" Kevin asked slowly.

"Well, given the fact that Crowley is an extremely powerful demon, with an army of demons supporting him, I'd say it could take months"

"Months?" Kevin exclaimed. "You want me to hide out here for months? How am I supposed to do that? I have human needs"

"Not to worry" Anna responded. She nodded to something behind Kevin and he turned around. A young girl was stepping out of the shadows and walking towards them. "Kevin, I want you to meet Alexia Miller aka Alexia Moore aka prophet. She's here to keep you company"

"AKA keep an eye on you" Alexia added a little hostile. "We wouldn't want you to steal the tablets and run back to Crowley, now would we?"

* * *

**Part 7**

Dean and Jo were sitting in a restaurant. Jo had convinced Dean to go out so that he could take his mind of Cas and whatever it was that kept making him ill.

"You look pretty" Dean said, with a faint smile.

"I didn't even change my outfit" Jo answered cynical.

Dean looked down and Jo recognized his expression.

"Are you texting?" she asked upset.

"What?" Dean said quick. "No, no, I was…I was checking time…"

"why? You bored?" Jo asked offended.

"No!" Dean denied firm. "I just…I don't want to leave Cas alone for too long. He's sick and I'm afraid that Meg might come back for him"

"Meg's not going to hurt him" Jo said annoyed.

"Right, because demon's are generally so nice" Dean replied sarcastically.

"She's not a demon anymore" Jo said sharp.

"Well, she's not an angel either!" Dean fired back and he stood. He threw some money on the table and took off.

Jo grabbed her purse and followed him outside.

"Are you kidding me?" she yelled. "Did you really just bail on me in a crowded restaurant?" She accelerated her steps and blocked his way.

"Get out of the way, Jo" Dean said calm.

"Are you jealous?" she asked upfront.

"What?" Dean asked, taken aback.

"Uhh, Cas is sick. Uhh, Cas is hurting. Uhh, Cas is sleeping with Meg. It's like you're obsessed with him" Jo exclaimed furious.

"I didn't…" Dean started stammering. "I'm not…"

"It's okay, if that's what you are" Jo said, softer now. "But don't pretend Meg's the problem" She pulled out her phone and ordered a taxi. "You need to go home alone and figure some stuff out"

* * *

**Part 8**

Cas was standing in the bathroom, looking in the mirror. He looked very pale and his body felt like it was on fire. His hands had started itching again and this time Cas couldn't take it anymore. He opened the mirror cupboard and took the scissors. He tried to open it, but the bandage was too tick and inconvenient to even hold it for five seconds.

He brought his right hand to his mouth and his teeth chewed the bandage. He unwounded the bandage with his teeth and when his hand was free, he used it to take the bandage off his left hand. He threw the bandage on the floor and looked at his scarred hands. He stared at them as if he was waiting for them to heal. But of course that didn't happen.

He was being punished. God was punishing him for turning his back on the angels. For being in love with a former demon. That was the only logical and acceptable explanation for this torture.

His hands were driving him insane and so he placed his nails on his left hand and started scratching.

* * *

**Part 9**

Meg was sitting on her bed. She had sneaked inside as soon as Dean had left. Jo had promised her to get him out of the house. She didn't want to deal with his snarky commentary.

Sam was sitting on the bed as well. He felt weird around Meg, but since Cas was sick and there was no one else, they might as well keep each other company.

"How is it like? Being human?" Sam asked, trying to break the ice. "I mean, after being a demon for so long"

"Honestly? It sucks. Big time" Meg replied bitter. "I've always been able to recall every single murder I've committed, but I've never felt bad about it. Until now. I don't want to feel this. I don't want to feel anything. I wish I could just rip my heart out my chest and be dead"

Sam stared at Meg as she started crying. That was a new one. He tapped her on the back, not knowing what else to do.

"And of course, your precious brother has to point out all my flaws" Meg continued with a somewhat high pitched voice. "Does he like guarding Cas like a pit-bull?"

"I wouldn't exactly call it guarding" Sam said slowly. "It's more…protecting him. Look, I know you're not a demon anymore and so does Cas, but Dean's just having a little trouble adjusting. You helped Azazel who killed our parents, you killed Ellen and Jo, you paralyzed Bobby, you've possessed and tortured people. Dean's just having a hard time seeing you hooking up with his best friend. He's lost a lot of people and he's afraid you will take another one away from him"

"If Cas wants to be with me, there's nothing Dean can do about it" Meg replied defensive. "Besides, he said he loves me. Nothing Dean says can change that"

* * *

**Part 10**

Cas had traded the bathroom for the kitchen. His hands were bleeding and hurting, but he didn't mind, because at least this time he knew why he was hurting.

His stomach felt like someone was trying to tear it apart and he was searching for the painkillers, praying Dean hadn't taken them with him.

Fortunately, he hadn't. Cas found them in the drawer, underneath some garbage. He took out all the pills and put them in a glass of water. He knew it wasn't smart and that he would regret it, rather sooner than later, but this pain was unbearable.

"And do you love him?" Sam asked careful.

Meg wanted to answer, when they heard a blow.

"Did you hear that?" she asked and Sam nodded. They jumped off the bed and ran downstairs.

Cas was lying on the floor, the empty glass next to him, shattered in pieces. Meg kneeled next to him and shook him.

"Cas, wake up!" she shouted. "What did you do?"

"Meg" Sam said soft, but urgent. Meg looked up and Sam showed her the empty painkiller box.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11: Calling the Shots**

**Part 1**

Sam pulled Cas from the ground and dragged him to the sink.

"Come on, barf" he commanded.

"Leave me alone" Cas mumbled faint, his eyes closed. Sam turned to Meg. "Go get his toothbrush" he ordered. Meg ran upstairs and came back half a minute later, with the toothbrush.

"Open your mouth, Cas" Sam said sharp and urgent. Cas pressed his lips together, stubborn like a two-year old.

"Let me try something" Meg said and Sam took a step back, still supporting Cas. Meg took Cas' face in her hands and kissed him. She then withdrew and drove the toothbrush in his throat. Cas gagged, coughed and tears came up in his eyes. He tried to free himself, but Sam tightened his grip and Meg drove the toothbrush further in his throat.

Cas gagged and brought his hand to his mouth. Sam let go of him and he puked in the sink.

"Why did you do that?" Cas said defeated, when he was done.

"Are you kidding?" Sam replied shocked. "Are you trying to get yourself killed?"

"Yes" Cas snapped. He looked from Sam to Meg and back. "You don't get it. You think I have some kind of illness, such as cancer, but that's not what it is. I am dying, I can feel it, and whatever it is that's killing me, it's dragging it out. I just want it to be over with"

Meg took a napkin and cleaned off Cas' mouth.

"I get that the pain is driving you to the point of insanity" she started. "but there's no way I'm letting you commit suicide. Not on my watch"

* * *

**Part 2**

The tablets were lying across a table and Kevin was studying them.

"Any luck?" Alexia asked, leaning against the table and looking at Kevin.

"Nope" Kevin replied frustrated. "I should be able to read this, but I can't. Something's wrong with my powers. My prophet powers, I mean. Not the angel ones"

"Yeah, I think that's the problem" Alexia commented. "You were chosen as a prophet. You were never supposed to be part angel. Your angel powers are screwing with your prophet powers"

Kevin sighed and put the tablet down. "Then what am I supposed to do? Give them up? Anna said the more powerful I am, the better" he said reluctant.

"You could give them back to uncle Cas" Alexia tried careful. "You don't really need them and he's going to die if he doesn't turn back into an angel soon. He's sick and no one knows what's wrong with him, but I know something inside him is torturing him and he's got two options to make it stop. He either dies or he becomes an angel once again"

Kevin squeezed his eyes and pierced his glance in Alexia's eyes.

"You didn't come up with that" he said slowly. "The angels have sent you. They want you to convince me to give back the angel juice to Cas, so he can be an angel again"

Alexia raised her eyebrows. "You make it sound like such a horrible thing. I'm trying to save his life"

"At what cost?" Kevin asked. "What's the catch?"

Alexia sighed. Why was he so clever? "If he becomes an angel again, he has to stay up in Heaven. He can never go back to the Earth"

"So, he gets to live, but he can't see his friends anymore or the girl he's in love with, who by the way has some very joyful news to tell him, which will make him want to stay here, is that it?" Kevin summed up disgusted.

"Yeah, but why do you even care?" Alexia exclaimed.

"Why don't you?" Kevin fired back. "You pretend like he matters to you, but you're about to take everything away from him"

"I want his suffering to end. And if that means pulling the plug out of his human life, then so be it. Castiel was never meant to be human, just like you were never meant to be an angel" Alexia reasoned passionately.

"Well, I got news for you, little girl" Kevin said demeaning, pointing out the fact that technically Alexia was only five years old. "I can't give up my powers, even if I wanted to, because technically they're not mine. Cas gave them to Crowley, they belong to him. Crowley has to take the powers from me and then he can give them to you. Though something tells me he's not going to do that"

He turned back to the tablets and began to study them again.

* * *

**Part 3**

Cas was lying on the bed, his head on Meg's lap. Anna was also in the room, after Sam had summoned her. There was only one thing left to do. Anna would have to read Cas to see if he was being possessed.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Anna asked soft. Usually she wasn't so reluctant, but this wasn't just anyone. This was Cas, her brother. She didn't want to hurt him.

Cas nodded and Anna came closer to him. She placed her hand on his belly and looked at Meg. "Distract him" she said and she stuck her hand inside Cas' stomach.

Cas gasped and images of Zoey tearing his insides out flashed before his eyes. Meg took his hand and he clenched her fingers. It hurt, but Meg didn't pull away.

After a minute Anna withdrew her hand.

"He's not being possessed" she said.

"What? But that's impossible" Meg replied astonished.

"He's not being possessed, Meg" Anna repeated, almost apologizing. And without another word she left the room.

* * *

**Part 4**

Meg took Cas' scarred hands in hers and looked at them closely.

"Where did you leave the bandage?" she asked.

"Bathroom" Cas mumbled numb.

Meg let go of him and climbed off the bed. She left the room and headed to the bathroom. She opened the door and held her breath.

Cas pushed himself up and stumbled out of bed. He staggered to the window and opened it. He looked down and tried to figure out the best way to fall down. He had to be dead, not crippled.

Meg cleaned up the blood and collected the bandage, before she went back to Cas' room. She opened the door and dropped the bandage. Cas was sitting on the edge of the window.

"What are you doing?" Meg asked careful, trying not to scare him. "Get of off there"

Cas shook his head. "I have to die. The voice said I have to die" he explained cryptic.

"What voice? What are you talking about?" Meg asked confused as she slowly walked towards him.

"The voice in my head. You heard it, too. He said awful things to you, when I was in the hospital" Cas said trembling.

"No, Cas" Meg responded, getting a bit terrified. "That was you. Those words came out of your mouth. You said them, no one else"

"I thought you of all people would understand" Cas said defeated. He was about to jump, when Meg grabbed his arm and pulled him back inside. She quickly locked the windows and walked back to the door to collect the bandage. She winded them around Cas' hands, tying him up.

"What are you doing?" Cas mumbled careless.

"Maybe you're willing to give up, but I'm not. I will figure out what it is that's driving you nuts" Meg replied passionately. "Oh, and you know how they tell you to listen to the voice inside you?" Cas nodded. "Don't" Meg added and she tied Cas' hands onto the bed. "Stay here"

Since Cas was tied up, he had no other choice then to watch her go. He had no idea how long she'd be gone, so he'd have to move fast.

* * *

**Part 5**

Dean opened the door of the house, wondering if Jo was there, too, or if she had returned home.

"Sammy?" he called, assuming Cas would be asleep. He walked to the kitchen and saw Sam sitting with his head in his hands.

"What happened?" Dean asked sharp, already regretting the fact that he left.

"We asked Anna to read Cas, to see if he was being possessed" Sam started tired.

"We?" Dean asked, though he had an idea.

"Meg and I" Sam confirmed Dean's suspicion. "She's not here anymore" he added quick when he saw Dean's face change. "He's not being possessed. But that's not all. He swallowed the painkillers the doctor gave you. All of them. Meg- Dean, wait!"

When Sam had told him about the painkillers, he had turned around and ran upstairs to Cas' room. Cas was sitting on the ground, his hands tied to the bed.

"Dean" Cas said relieved. He pulled a hurt face and showed him his damaged hands. "Can you take these off. Meg did this"

"Why would she do that?" Dean asked, slightly surprised.

"I don't know. I guess you were right about her. I can't trust her" Cas replied. Dean hesitated. "Dean, please, my hands really hurt"

"I'm sorry" Dean said and he kneeled next to Cas. He took the bandage off and helped Cas stand up. Cas lifted his hand and punched Dean in the face.

"What the hell?" Dean exclaimed, but before he could recover himself, Cas tied his hands onto the bed. He searched his pockets and found the key of the Impala.

He left the room and raced downstairs. He opened the door and walked outside.

"Sam!" Dean yelled. "Sammy!"

* * *

**Part 6**

Heather and Isabel were sitting at the kitchen table, having a cup of coffee. Heather had insisted on wanting to know why exactly Isabel had been fired from the police department.

Isabel was about to reproach her cousin for her way of making money when the bell rang.

"I'll get it" Heather said fast, glad she wouldn't have to comment. She walked to the door and was slightly surprised to see Cas in the doorway.

"Can I come in?" he asked.

"Yeah, sure" Heather said and she stepped aside. She walked him to the kitchen. "Do you want some coffee?"

"No" Cas replied, looking straight at Isabel, who got a strange vibe.

"Eh, Heather, I have to go" she said slowly, getting up from her chair. She started walking when Cas saw something shiny from underneath her jacket. He raced to the drawer and pulled out a knife. He grabbed Heather's arm and pulled her to him.

"Inspector Roberts!" he shouted.

Isabel turned around and swallowed; Cas was holding the knife against Heather's throat.

"Give me your gun" he ordered shaking.

Isabel slowly conjured her weapon and gave it to Cas. He threw the knife in the sink and held the gun against Heather's head.

"Sit down" he ordered.

Heather sank down on her chair.

"You too" Cas snapped to Isabel, who did the same. He turned to Heather. "Where's your stuff?" he asked agitated.

"What?" Heather asked uncomprehending.

"The drugs you gave me. Where is it?" he snapped, waving with the gun.

"It's gone. I got rid of it" Heather answered scared.

"You're lying" Cas commented and he walked to Isabel. He aimed the gun at her. "Where is it?" he asked threatening.

"What do you want it for? Don't you remember what happened the last time? You're going to kill yourself" Heather tried to reason with him.

"It's my body!" Cas exclaimed defensive. "I can do with it whatever I want. Now, where is it?"

Heather, who had tears in her eyes, looked from Isabel to Cas. "It's in my bedroom"

Cas left the women alone and rushed to Heather's bedroom.

* * *

**Part 7**

"Dean!" Sam exclaimed when he saw Dean sitting on the floor, his hands tied. He kneeled and freed his older brother.

"I'm going to kill him!" Dean snapped.

"What happened?" Sam asked frowning.

"Cas has gone crazy. He attacked me. He's totally nuts" Dean explained furious. He tried to calm himself by taking a few deep breaths.

"Dean, we have to find him. He's not himself" Sam said sharp. "I'm going to start calling people"

"You're not calling that demon" Dean replied in a threatening way. Sam, who didn't know who else to call, put his phone away. "I'm going to call the cops and tell him someone stole the Impala. If they can track down the car, we might be able to find Cas"

"Yeah, alright" Sam nodded.

Cas was injecting himself with heroin, while Isabel and Heather were downstairs.

Isabel got up and conjured her phone.

"What are you doing?" Heather asked nervous.

"I'm calling the cops" Isabel responded determined.

"No!" Heather yelled. Then, softer: "If they know I keep drugs in my house, they'll put me in jail"

"You have a better idea, genius?" Isabel asked snarky.

"I know who we have to call" Heather nodded and she took her own phone, dialing Meg's number. "You're boyfriend's here" she said before Meg could say anything. "He has a gun and he's looking for drugs. I think he has a serious death wish, so unless you want to see him wither and die, I suggest you hurry the hell up"

Meg hung up and dialed Dean's number, hoping Dean wouldn't be so stubborn to ignore her. But of course he was. She cursed and dialed Sam's number.

"Meg?" Sam asked, Dean shooting him an irritated glance. "What?...And where does Heather live?...Okay, thanks"

He ended the conversation and looked at Dean. "Cas is at Heather's, looking for drugs. He has a gun and he's keeping Heather hostage"

"Okay, let's go" Dean replied and he ran downstairs, Sam following him. They walked outside and Dean walked to the first car they came across with. "Keep an eye on the street"

Sam obeyed and Dean forced the lock of the car. They got in the car and Dean pulled a few threads to get the car started. They drove away, when a man came out of his house, witnessing his car being stolen.

* * *

**Part 8**

Dean drove full speed ahead, crossing a few red lights. Cas was lying on the backseat, unconscious.

"Dean, slow down, you're getting us all killed" Sam said accenting his words. Dean chose to ignore him and parked the Impala in front of the hospital. He pulled the key out and stepped out. He opened the door to the backseat and dragged Cas out. With Sam's help he carried him inside the hospital. Since Dean was too much in shock, Sam explained to the doctor what happened.

About an hour later, the doctor came to them and they could tell from his expression that he didn't have good news.

"He's alive…for now" the doctor started. "But there's nothing we can do for him. He has taken an incredible amount of heroin, it's a miracle he's still alive. He's fighting, he's trying to hold on. If you want to say goodbye, I wouldn't wait much longer"

He walked the Winchesters to Cas' room. "Is there someone else I should inform?" he asked. Dean shook his head. The doctor left them alone and they walked to the bed.

"Hello, Dean. Sam" Cas mumbled hoarse. "I'm sorry for stealing your car…again"

"Ssshhh" Dean whispered.

Cas looked from Dean to Sam. "Are you guys alone? Where's Meg?"

Sam looked at Dean, who looked at Cas.

"She's busy" he answered vague.

"Can you ask her to come?" Cas begged, his voice softer than a whisper.

"No, Cas" Dean responded insensitive. "She's the reason you're here in the first place. She doesn't deserve to say goodbye"

Cas rotated his head to Sam, who stood up. "I have to go do something"

* * *

**Part 9**

Ten minutes later the door opened and Meg appeared in the doorway. Cas' heart jumped up, but Dean walked to the door and pushed Meg outside.

"What are you doing here?" he hissed.

"Sam called me. He said Cas wanted to see me before he died. Are you really going to deny him his last wish?" Meg asked in disbelief.

"It's for his own good" Dean said heartless and he grabbed Meg's arm, dragging her to the stairs, leading to the ground floor.

"For his own good? He's dying!" Meg exclaimed.

"And who's fault is that? You're the one that introduced him to Heather. You left that crack whore alone with him" Dean yelled accusatory.

"And you let him escape. I tied him up for his own safety. You let him go and ran off to that crack whore! You're just as guilty" Meg defended herself. She took a deep breath. "Look, it's not about what we want. It's about what Cas wants and he wants to see me. Just let me go in for five minutes. Then, I promise I'll disappear forever"

She tried to move past Dean, but he grabbed her arms again.

"Dean, let me through!" Meg screamed and she struggled to free herself. She tried to hit him in the face. "Let go of me!"

Dean could barely keep a hold of her and his grip loosened.

For a second Meg stared him scared in the eye. Dean tried to grab her hand, but she fell down the stairs.

Dean stared upset at Meg, who groaned and held her stomach. He wanted to go to her, when Anna appeared next to her.

She turned to Dean. "Go back to Cas, Dean" she commanded, before she helped Meg stand up. She supported Meg, looking for a doctor, leaving a trail of blood.

* * *

**Part 10**

Anna opened the door of Cas' room and let Meg in. She was wearing a hospital shirt and her eyes were red and swollen. Anna signed at Dean and he followed her outside.

"Has Meg told you about her condition?" she asked careful. Dean frowned and shook his head. "She was pregnant"

"Pregnant?" Dean repeated as if he'd never heard of the word.

"Was" Anna said. "She just had a miscarriage"

"Did I kill Cas' unborn child?" Dean asked, shocked by the fact that Meg could get pregnant.

"Yeah, looks like it" Anna replied merciless. She gave Dean one last reproaching look, before she vanished.

Dean entered the room and tried to avoid looking at Meg. He stayed by the door, giving Meg and Cas some space.

Cas looked at Meg as if he was seeing an angel. He lifted his hand and lay it on her cheek, catching her tears.

"I love you" he whispered. His hand glided off her cheek and he closed his eyes.

"Cas?" Meg asked faint. He didn't respond. "Cas! Cas, wake up!" Meg screamed, shaking Cas. Sam walked to her and pulled her away from the bed.

"He's dead" he said sharp.

Meg shook her head. "No. He's not dead" she sobbed.

Dean was still standing by the door, too upset by Cas' death and too stunned by Meg's emotional reaction, to react himself.

Then, suddenly, Cas sat up.

"What?" Dean said soft. Meg and Sam looked up.

Cas swung his legs off the bed and walked towards the door.

"Cas?" Meg asked uncertain.

Cas turned around.

"I'm not Cas" he said sinister. "I'm Jimmy. I'm calling the shots now"


	12. Chapter 12

**Note: Pay attention to this chapter, because it will come back in a different way.**

**Chapter 12: Leverage **

**Part 1**

Dean opened the door and followed Jimmy outside.

"Hey, wait a minute!" he yelled.

Jimmy stopped and waited patiently for Dean to catch up with him.

"Where's Cas? What did you do to him?" Dean asked trembling and furious.

"Don't worry, he's alive. He's in here, somewhere. We switched places" Jimmy explained dark.

"I thought you were dead" Dean snapped hostile.

"Clearly you didn't pay much attention. Castiel said I wouldn't age or die. I've been stuck in my own body for ages and it's time Castiel knows what that feels like" Jimmy replied bitter.

"But…how…?" Dean stammered.

"How did I regain control over my body?" Jimmy finished Dean's unspoken question. "From the moment Castiel turned human I've attacked him from the inside"

Sam joined them. "Wait, you're the one that gave him those headaches and stomach aches and fevers" he realized.

Jimmy smiled as if he were proud of himself.

"And I'm the one who forced him to take those painkillers and bash his head against the toilet. And I'm the one who let him OD on heroin" he added. "Now, if you don't mind, I have a wife and daughter who need me"

He turned around, leaving Sam and Dean stunned.

* * *

**Part 2**

5 am

Dean entered the kitchen and saw Meg sitting at the table, with a cup of coffee.

"You're up early" he mumbled. Meg looked up. "I get it" Dean added. "You never went to sleep"

Meg shook her head.

"Yeah, me neither" Dean replied soft. "So, eh, what are you going to do now?"

Meg shrugged and stirred her coffee.

"You know what I said when Cas told me he loved me? I told him to shut up. I never said it back" she said sober.

"I'm sure he knew that" Dean said careful.

"It doesn't matter" Meg replied sharp. "He's gone. There's no need for me to be human anymore"

Dean frowned. "What are you talking about? Are you saying you're going to try and be a demon again?"

"Why not? I lost my baby and the only man who's ever loved me no matter what" Meg defended herself passionately. "At least when I'm a demon I don't have to feel that"

"You're just going back to your old life, erasing every good thing Cas used to see in you?" Dean asked disgusted.

"Cas is gone and he's not coming back!" Meg exclaimed, throwing her cup of cold coffee on the floor. She gasped, startled by her own emotion, and bent through her knees to collect the fragments.

Dean kneeled next to her.

"I'm sorry for what I did" he said. "For causing you a miscarriage and for being a dick. I just couldn't get myself around the fact that you're practically…one of us now. I think I didn't want to. It was just easier to see you as a demon" he paused a second. "Cas isn't dead. Jimmy said he was still in there. We just have to get him out. You can't give up on him"

He took her hand and pulled her up.

"Let's get him back" he suggested.

* * *

**Part 3**

Since there was no way any of them was going to get any sleep, they packed their bags and loaded the Impala. Dean placed himself behind the wheel, Sam sat next to him and Meg on the backseat.

"First stop: Pontiac, Illinois" Dean said, as he started the engines and drove ahead. As they drove Dean turned on the radio to break the silence.

Meg stared out of the window. She felt utterly powerless. Had she still been a demon she would've just zapped herself to him. But then maybe she wouldn't have felt this way and she wouldn't even bother to go find him.

Maybe this was a sign. Maybe she was supposed to let go and go back to her old life.

No!, she reproached herself. You're not going back to killing for fun. You didn't get this far to throw it all away. You're going to find Cas and get him back.

"Everything okay, there?" Dean asked.

"Yeah, I'm good" Meg replied with a mischievous smile.

* * *

**Part 4**

Dean parked the car in front of the driveway of Jimmy's house and stepped out, Sam and Meg doing the same. They walked to the door and Dean rang the bell. Meg tried to look inside, and noticed a teenage girl lying in the couch, listening to her iPod.

"Hi, you probably don't remember us" Dean said, when the door opened and Amelia, Jimmy's wife, appeared. "I'm Dean, this is Sam and that's Meg" Dean continued, with a nod at Meg.

"No, I know you' Amelia commented fast. She seemed a little nervous. "Why are you here?"

"Eh, well, it's kind of complicated" Sam took over from Dean. "We're looking for Jimmy. We have reason to believe he's here"

Amelia's eyes flashed to the door and back to the Winchesters. "Last time I saw Jimmy was when that angel possessed him"

"Yeah, see, that's where it gets complicated" Sam continued. "Cas is not an angel anymore. He's human now and apparently Jimmy has been fighting Cas to regain control over his body, which he did, but now Cas is stuck in there"

"You mean like Jimmy has been stuck for years?" Amelia asked with raised eyebrows. "I don't really see the problem. It's Jimmy's body" She tried to close the door, but Meg put her foot against the door.

"Here's what we're going to do, Barbie. You're going to tell us where we can find the jerk that's keeping Cas hostage and then maybe we won't tear you to shreds. How's that for a deal?" she threatened.

Dean grabbed her upper arm and pulled her away.

"My apologies" he mumbled to Amelia. "She's a little on edge"

"I don't know where Jimmy is. And I wouldn't let any of you go near him" Amelia said. She frowned, like she was hurting. "Please, just go. I can't help you" She closed the door, and heard Meg swear.

* * *

**Part 5**

Dean parked his car at the first motel they came across with. "Wait here" he said as he opened the door and stepped out. He closed the door and walked to the motel.

A few minutes later he returned to the Impala and Sam and Meg got out.

"We got two rooms" he said.

"Yeah, go guys go ahead" Meg mumbled. "I just need to take care of something" She eyed the car that was positioned a few yards away from them.

"Alright" Dean said a little suspicious. "Here are your keys" He threw them at Meg and she caught them with one hand. Deciding to let Meg handle whatever is what that she needed to handle he walked Sam to their room.

Meg headed for the green car, opened the door on the passenger's side and got in. The girl at the wheel shrieked and wanted to loosen her seatbelt, but Meg stopped her, by conjuring a pocket knife.

"What do you want? I don't have much money on me and my jewelry is fake" the girl said shaking.

"I don't want your money. I don't want anything from you, just one question answered" Meg replied. "Why are you following us?"

The girl shook her head. "I wasn't" she answered breathless. Meg held the knife against her throat. "Want to try that again?" "Okay, I was" the girl confessed. "I heard those two guys talking about my dad. I've seen them before, they don't come bearing gifts, at least not the kind you wish for. I want to know what they want from him"

Meg pulled the knife away. "Fair enough" she said soft. "I will tell you everything you want to know, but not in here. I have a motel room where we can talk in private"

"Okay" the girl nodded. "But first we need to go to the supermarket"

"Why?" Meg asked suspicious.

"Because that color doesn't suit you"

* * *

**Part 6**

Meg opened the door of her motel room and pushed Claire inside. They had introduced their selves to one another while shopping for hair products.

"Sit down" Claire ordered and Meg raised her eyebrows. "I can't dye your hair while you're standing"

"You know how to do it, then?" Meg asked careful. She wasn't vain, but she didn't want to look like an idiot either.

"Please, I've done it a thousand times" Claire insured Meg. "You can trust me"

Meg reluctantly sat down on a chair and Claire unpacked the hair dye shampoo. She prepared the shampoo and then went standing behind Meg. As she put the shampoo on Meg's hair she started talking.

"So, tell me, why do you need my father?" she asked.

"He has something that belongs to me" Meg replied, before realizing how possessive that sounded. "I mean…he has something that's important to me and I would like to have it back. And so do Sam and Dean"

Claire looked down, then up again. "I know how you feel. I lost my dad two times" she said. "What is it that you want back?"

"If you don't mind I'd rather discuss that with your father" Meg responded.

"I heard Dean mention a name. Cas or something? Something about him being stuck in there?" Claire summed up.

Meg turned around. "Why do you ask all these questions when you clearly already have the answers? Didn't your mother teach you eavesdropping is very rude?"

"I can find my dad" Claire said, avoiding Meg's commentary. "I'll call him and tell him that you're keeping me hostage and that he has to surrender himself to you" She conjured her phone and dialed a number. Meg walked towards her, took her phone and smashed it on the floor.

"What are you doing?" Claire frowned.

Meg grabbed her wrists and pulled her to the chair, where she pushed her down. She walked to the cupboard and found some quick-release straps. Claire, too shocked to act, stayed put. Meg walked back to her and tied Claire's hands on her back, then walked back in front of her.

"Or I can really keep you hostage" she smiled, before covering Claire's mouth with tape.

* * *

**Part 7**

"Claire, when you get this, please call me back. I'm not angry with you for taking the car without asking. I'm just really worried" Amelia said, trying to stay calm. Claire had pretended to be listening to her IPod, while those morons were questioning her about Jimmy's whereabouts. Soon as they had left Amelia had heard the car and noticed Claire was gone.

She hung up and went to the kitchen to make some tea. When it was ready she took the tea upstairs and walked inside her bedroom.

Five minutes later the sound of breaking porcelain was heard on the floor. Amelia opened the door, upset and in tears, and ran downstairs to get a mob.

However, when she arrived downstairs, cleaning would be the last thing on her mind. Someone had entered her house. The woman, minus Sam and Dean. She had dark hair now.

"Who are you?" Amelia asked trembling.

"Yeah, why don't we skip the small talk and get straight to business" Meg replied cold. "Plain simple, Mrs. Novak. You have something I want back, I have something you want back. Let's trade. Oh, and no police or Claire will be demon meat. I used to be a demon, I still have connections. So, better show up at this address," Meg gave her a note with the address of the motel and it's number, "with your hubby or even better, send him alone. You have until midnight"

Meg turned around and left. Amelia turned around as well and looked upstairs.

* * *

**Part 8**

The motel.

Claire was still tied onto her chair. She rubbed her hands, trying to free them, but all she managed to do was tighten the quick-release straps and cause her wrists to bleed. She went with her tongue against the tape to make it loose.

In the room next door Sam and Dean were trying to figure out the best way to approach Jimmy. Amelia might have said she hadn't seen her husband, it was more likely that she was hiding him from them. And even if she was speaking the truth, it would only be a matter of time before Jimmy would try and contact his family.

Claire managed to loosen the tape a little and screamed for help, hoping someone would hear her.

"Did you hear that?" Sam asked Dean, who nodded. They ran outside and followed the screams. "It's coming from here" Sam concluded.

Dean banged the door. "Are you okay in there?"

"I'm alright, just get me out of here!" Claire shouted.

"Okay, hang on" Dean yelled. The door was locked and so he lifted his foot and kicked the door open. He walked to Claire and noticed her hands. Then he went looking for something to cut the quick-release straps, while Sam tried to comfort her.

"What happened? Who did this to you?" he asked soft.

"Meg" Claire sobbed. "She wants to use me as leverage to get her boyfriend back"

Dean came back with a wire shears and cut through the straps. Claire pulled her arms forward.

"You should take care of that" Sam pointed at her wounded wrists. Claire shrugged.

"Do you know where Meg is now?" Dean asked sharp.

"Probably negotiating with my mom" Claire replied. "I don't know when she'll be back"

"Don't worry, we won't let her anywhere near you" Sam promised. He looked at Dean, who got the message.

"Hey, why don't you go with Sam, then I'll wait for Meg" he suggested.

Claire looked reluctantly from Dean to Sam. Could she trust them? Sam knew what she was thinking. "Look, we just freed you. We could've just let you sit tight. You're going to have to trust us" he reasoned.

Still a little reluctant Claire followed Sam outside, while Dean sat down on the chair, waiting for Meg.

* * *

**Part 9**

Meg opened the door of her room and saw Dean sitting where she had expected Claire to sit. "What are you doing here?" she asked, acting calm. "And where's Claire?"

"Oh, she's with Sam" Dean replied. "She's fine, by the way, no thanks to you" He got up and walked to Meg. "Seriously, Meg, what were you thinking?"

"Hey, for the record, this was her idea" Meg defended herself. "She said I should tell her mother I'm keeping her hostage in exchange for Jimmy and I just figured it would be a lot more convincing if I'd do it for real"

Dean shook his head, furious. "You finally have my trust" he said. "But you're really close to losing it again"

"Like I care about your trust!" Meg exclaimed. "All I want is for Cas to come back and anything else doesn't matter"

"And I want him to come back too, but we're not going to kill anyone for that" Dean fired back.

"Really?" Meg scoffed. "And what do you think is going to happen when Jimmy gets here? What, you're going to ask him nicely if he wants to get the fuck out of his own body, so Cas can get his life back? I don't want to be a buzzkill, but I would say that's a long shot"

"We'll find a way" Dean replied sharp.

"I know a way" Meg said stubborn. "Jimmy has to die"

* * *

**Part 10**

The door opened again and Sam and Claire walked in.

"Nice color" Sam mumbled, referring to Meg's hair.

"Gee, thanks" Meg said monotone. She looked at Claire, who looked back provocative. With two Winchesters at her arm she felt a lot more confident. "When's your dad coming?"

"Meg!" Dean reproached her. Meg pulled her shoulders. Dean conjured his phone and handed it to Claire. "You should call your mom, tell her you're fine"

Claire dialed her home number. Her mother sounded very agitated when she answered the phone.

"Who is this?" she asked a little snappy as she didn't recognize the caller.

"Mom?" Claire asked insecure. She heard her mother let out a deep sigh of relief.

"Thank God, it's you" Amelia said. "Is everything okay with you?"

"I'm fine" Claire replied.

"Okay, I'm going to pick you up" Amelia continued.

"No, Sam and Dean will give me a ride home" Claire said, trying to save her mother the trouble.

"Sam and Dean are with you? Did they hurt you?" Amelia asked nervous.

"No, mom, they saved me" Claire reassured her.

"Can I get one of them on the phone?" Amelia requested and a second later she was talking to Sam. "I lied, okay?" she cut to the chase. "I did see Jimmy, but after Meg's threats he disappeared and I have no idea where he is now. There's something wrong with him. He's sick or something. He's not himself… I think I need your help. But first I have to find him"

The door of the motel room opened for the third time that night and Jimmy appeared in the doorway.

"I don't think that's going to be a problem, Amelia" Sam said slow. "He's right here" He heard Amelia hang up and assumed she was on her way.

"Dad?" Claire asked careful. Jimmy turned his head to her and cast her a glance that could've turned her into ice if such thing were possible. "You're not my dad" Claire concluded shivering.

"Cas?" Meg asked hopeful. The man nodded and Meg walked to him. She shut the door and took Cas' hands in hers. "You're freezing" she gasped.

"How did you regain control?" Dean wanted to know.

"That doesn't matter" Meg reproached Dean.

"What happened to Jimmy?" Dean ignored Meg.

"Shut up, Dean, we can do this tomorrow" Meg snapped, but Cas jerked his hands. He walked to Dean and Sam and looked from one brother to the other.

"You know what they say. Two's a party" Cas said slow and dark. "Three's a crowd"


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13: The Rat Trap**

**Part 1**

Cas rubbed his eyes and looked at his friends. "I understand you're a little overwhelmed" he started. "But I would really like to sleep now"

"Yeah, okay, we can talk tomorrow" Meg said with a warning look at Dean.

Cas walked to the single bed and started to undress. Then he realized the amount of eyes staring at him. "Are you all going to watch me sleep?"

"No, of course not" Sam said quickly. He put a hand on Claire's shoulder. "We'll take this young lady back home. Come on" he said to Claire, but Claire pushed his hand away. She walked towards Cas.

"You killed my dad" she said trembling and accusatory.

Cas looked at Dean, trying to find support.

"Claire, this is not the right time. Your mother's worried for you" Dean said.

"You killed my dad!" Claire repeated furious. "You killed him, you son of a bitch!" She went so up in her swearing that she didn't notice Cas walking slowly towards her. He grabbed her throat and lifted her from the ground.

"Shut your mouth" he hissed. "or I will break your neck" He put Claire down and pushed her in Sam's arms. "Get her away" he ordered.

Sam and Dean left with Claire, though Dean didn't like leaving Cas alone with Meg and this time the trust issue wasn't the girl.

As soon as the door closed Cas conjured a faint smile.

"You dyed your hair again" he noted. "I like it"

He walked towards her and Meg swallowed. "What's wrong?" he asked confused.

"How did you come back? How did you kill Jimmy?" Meg demanded to know.

Cas sighed. "I didn't. I did the same things he did to me and he got sick. And then he was gone. I couldn't feel his presence anymore. I didn't mean to kill anyone, but it is what is, so can we please just move on?" he plead.

"Yeah, sure" Meg nodded. She looked away. "You should get some sleep"

Cas took her face in his hands and kissed her. Meg felt her knees go weak and she fell in Cas' arms. He lay her down on the bed, before walking to the table and writing a note. After that he put his coat back on and walked outside.

* * *

**Part 2**

Cas walked inside the same café he had been the night he found out Meg was human, too. He looked around and noticed to his great delight that the same three men were sitting at the same table as last time he had seen them there.

He stared at them, until they felt it and turned their heads to him. He smirked as if he wanted to say: 'Come and get me'

He turned around and left the café. The three men looked at the bartender. "Come on, he's asking for it" one of them said disbelieving. The bartender shot them a warning glance. He allowed it once, but not again.

"I will call the cops if you do something to that man" he threatened, his hand already on the phone.

"I'm calling your bluff" one of them said and he and his mates ran outside.

They found Cas leaning against a wall, opposite the street, as if waiting for them. They crossed the street, all three very cocky and arrogant looking.

"Back for more, are you?"

"What can I say? I seek the danger" Cas replied sarcastically. "I inhale it"

"Last time we let you live. I'm not sure we can do that again. I mean, after all you're still a child rapist"

"I never raped anyone" Cas said and he grabbed one of their throats. "But I have killed" he added as a smile appeared on his face. "And I have no problem adding a few more on that list"

The two others started running, while Cas strangled the third.

* * *

**Part 3**

Cas' phone rang as he walked slowly towards the other two men. Without looking he picked up. "Meg"

"Where are you?" Meg asked a little hysterical. She was standing by the table, holding Cas' note in her hand.

"I believe I left you a piece of paper with my whereabouts" Cas replied.

"Yeah. Dear Meg, I have some unfinished business I have to deal with. I'll be back tomorrow" Meg read from the note. "What unfinished business? Where are you?" she repeated a little angry.

Cas didn't answer immediately. He had spotted his targets and caught up with them. "Do you remember the night Dean came knocking on your door, asking you to provide me a place to stay?" he asked through the phone, looking sharp at one of the men, without blinking.

"Yeah, that's the night when you were-"

"-ask Dean about the café. If you really want to know where I am, you should start there" he said and he hung up. He put his phone away and then grabbed the two men by their throat.

"Please…" the left one stammered hoarse and difficult. "Don't…kill…me" he begged.

"Kill you?" Cas frowned and he looked from the left one to the right one and back. "What are you talking about? I'm just getting started"

* * *

**Part 4**

Cas appeared inside a mansion, holding his two victims tightly. The owner of the house stood up from his seat and looked shocked at the intruder.

"What, in heaven's name, do you think you're doing?" the older man asked furious.

Cas pushed the men on the floor and walked steady to the man. Before the man could do so much as blink, Cas grabbed his neck and snapped it. Then he walked back to the others, grabbed their collars and dragged them to the basement.

He chained them up on their wrists and a few seconds later they were hanging on the ceiling. He searched their pockets and conjured their phones. He smashed them against the wall. Then he found their wallets. He took their money and put it in his own pocket. He read their ID's.

"Marcus and Frederik" he read aloud. He dropped the ID's and walked to Marcus. He conjured an angel sword and Marcus started moaning.

"Please" he cried. "Don't kill me…I didn't do anything"

"You didn't help me, either" Cas replied bitter, placing the point of the sword against his chest. "But you're right. You didn't do anything. You just made sure I couldn't run"

"I'm really sorry" Marcus wept.

"And I believe you" Cas said slowly and he heard a very soft sigh of relief. "Which is why I'm going to show you mercy" He drove the sword through his heart and blood spilled from his mouth. Frederik turned his head to Marcus, then to Cas.

"I thought you were going to show him mercy" he said terrified.

"I did" Cas smiled and he walked towards Frederik. He placed the sword against his stomach. "You'll wish you were him once I'm done with you" He drove the sword through his stomach, ignoring Frederik's cries.

* * *

**Part 5**

"What do you mean, he left?" Sam asked, looking at Meg, requesting a reasonable explanation. Meg turned to Dean, whose expression told her he already understood what was going on. He read the note and said. "So he told you to start at a café?" Meg nodded. "Unfinished business. Cas, you idiot" Dean said in himself.

"Is someone going to explain me what's going on?" Sam exclaimed. "What unfinished business? What is Cas up to?"

Dean and Meg glared at each other.

"Have a seat" Dean decided. Sam sat down on a chair, looking expectedly at his older brother. "You remember Cas was being accused of pedophilia?"

"Yeah" Sam said obvious.

"Some people still believe he's guilty and they wanted to punish him" Dean continued. "By doing to him what they believed he did to that girl"

Sam's eyes bulged. "You mean they…"

"Yeah" Dean said fast as if that would make it any less shocking. "I found him in an alley near a café, dirty and bleeding, only wearing his trench coat. He didn't have to say it"

Sam looked away, still stunned. Then he looked back.

"No wonder he was acting out at the shooting" he said. He took the note out of Dean's hand and read it. "You think he's after them?"

"Damn sure he is" Dean replied. "This is not going end well" He looked at Meg. "Meg, I suggest you stay here, while Sam and I go looking for him"

Trusting Meg would agree with that the Winchesters walked to the door. Except that she didn't agree.

"I'm not staying behind" she said disbelieving. "If something happens to Cas I want to be there"

"Meg, I really think it's best if someone stays here, in case he comes back" Sam tried to reason with her.

"Okay. You do that. Then I'll go with Dean, looking for Cas" Meg replied.

"No, you're not" Dean said sharp. "You stay here and call as many people as possible and we'll find Cas. It's what we do best"

"No, what you do best is hunt monsters and kill them!" Meg snapped angry.

"Sorry, Meg" Dean said short and he opened the door. Meg heard a click after the door closed and she ran towards it. She tried to open it, but found it locked.

"Dean! Open the door! I have to come with you! You can't leave me here!" Meg shouted desperately.

* * *

**Part 6**

Think, Frederik, think. Talk to him. Keep him from whatever it is he's planning with you, Frederik thought.

"What we did was wrong, I know that" he said loud. "But you have to understand. I have a daughter and I was afraid that you would-"

"That I would what?" Cas interrupted furious, pointing the sword against Frederik's throat. "That I would rape her? Just like I raped Alex? For the last time I didn't do that!"

"Please, man, I have a wife and two kids. They need me" Frederik begged.

"You spent every evening in that café, don't you think they're better off without you?" Cas asked obvious. His phone rang and he sighed annoyed. "What, Dean? I'm in the middle of something very important" he said snarky as he turned around.

Frederik grabbed his chains and pulled himself up. He threw his legs around Cas' neck and tried to strangle him.

Cas dropped the phone, while Frederik tried to snap his neck with his knees.

"Stop it" Cas let out difficult. He waved with the sword and stabbed at a random spot in Frederik's body.

Frederik screamed and let go. Cas turned around and saw he'd stabbed Frederiks thy.

"You shouldn't have done that, Frederik" he said cold and bitter as he drove the sword through the stab wound.

* * *

**Part 7**

Dean slowed down in a street near the café. A few yards further a police van was parked. Yellow stripes marked a crime scene and people in white costumes were discussing with people in black suits.

"You think it's Cas?" Sam asked, looking at Dean from the corner of his eye.

"If it's not, I'm fairly certain he's got something to do with it" Dean replied dark, before getting out of the car. He walked steady to the crime scene as he pulled out one of his fake ID's. "FBI, what do you got?"

"Man, 43, looks like he's been strangled to death" the coroner said. He took a step back so Sam and Dean had a clear view on the body.

"Are those…hand prints?" Sam asked as he saw the imprint of a right hand on the man's throat.

The coroner nodded. "I've never seen anything like this"

Dean felt someone poking him and turned around. It was the owner of the café, who had denied high and low that he'd seen Cas.

"Can I talk to you alone?" he asked accenting. Dean looked shortly at Sam, then back at the owner. "Yeah, sure" he responded and he walked away from the crowd. "What is it?"

"That friend of yours, the one you were looking for a while back, he was here tonight" the owner started nervous. "And there were three of my regular customers and well, they…they're kind of out to get him. Do you know what I mean? Anyways, he came in and it's like he wanted them to chase him. I threatened to call the police if they would do anything, but they didn't listen"

"So, Cas lured them outside. Then what?" Dean wanted to know.

"I waited. I hoped they'd come back and that everything was okay" the owner continued.

"But they didn't and it wasn't?" Dean guessed.

The owner shook his head. "No. After I closed my café I went to take a look. That's when I found Gary" he concluded horrified, looking over Dean's shoulder.

"Gary was one of them" Dean realized. "Thank you for your information" He left the owner behind and walked back to Sam.

"And? What did you find out?" Sam insisted as they got in the car.

Dean buckled up, before he answered. "It's definitely Cas"

* * *

**Part 8**

Cas opened the buttons on Frederik's shirt. He placed the sword against the right side of his chest.

"Let's play a game" he whispered. "I'll call it the pot calling the kettle black" He pierced the point of the sword into Frederik's flesh and started forming a letter. "You thought I did something. I was found innocent. The so-called victim clearly stated I did not do what you accuse me off. And yet you believed I was guilty and so you took matters in own hands. You punished me for my crime" He put the letter on the cabinet and started a new letter. "And now I'll punish you for yours" he said bitter, ignoring Frederik's screams.

"What are you doing?" a voice asked upset and disgusted.

Cas turned around and faced Anna. "Would you mind your own business, please?" he snapped hostile, before turning around to continue his torturing.

"Why are you doing this?" Anna asked, getting angry.

"Because this man did something bad" Cas explained vaguely, while he cut out the third letter. "And he deserves this"

"I'm sorry!" Frederik exclaimed. "I'm really sorry!"

"Shut up!" Cas hissed.

"He's showing remorse!" Anna shouted. "Whatever he's done, he regrets it. Untie him"

Cas threw his sword down angry and walked towards Anna. "I said, mind your own business" he said bitter as he grabbed her throat and squeezed it.

Anna tried to loosen Cas' grip with one hand and conjured her angel sword with the other. Cas, who noticed from the reflection in her eyes what Anna was up to, gripped her hand and forced the angel to drop the sword. He let go and Anna rubbed her throat.

"Leave" he commanded. "Come back and I will kill you"

Anna vanished and Cas returned to his hostage. He put the sword against his chest.

"Where were we?" Cas said as he cut out the fourth letter.

* * *

**Part 9**

Meg was pacing up and down the motel room. Both Sam and Dean had turned off their phones, so she had no idea if they had found Cas yet or not.

"Screw you, Dean" she growled and she walked to the door, forgetting it was locked. "Damn it!"

"I see you could use some help" Anna said from behind Meg. Meg turned around in fear. She never felt comfortable around angels, even now that she was a human. Anna quickly walked towards Meg. "I hope you're trying to get out so you can go to Cas?" she said in an interrogating tone.

"You know where he is?" Meg asked agitated.

"You could say that" Anna replied dark and Meg frowned.

"What is it?" she asked slowly.

Anna looked up and back at Meg. "I'm not supposed to talk to you about it, but I think you should know" she paused, waiting for Heaven to strike. It didn't and so she continued. "Cas has gone crazy. He killed two men and he's torturing a third. I tried to make him stop, but he wouldn't listen. He said they deserved it"

Meg shook her head, trying to absorb all the information. "But is Cas okay?" was all she wanted to know.

"No!" Anna exclaimed desperate. "Did you not hear what I just said? He's insane! You have to put an end to it, before the angels do!"

"They're going to kill him" Meg realized devastated. She nodded, while looking up at Anna. "I'll talk to him. He'll listen to me"

"He better" Anna replied strict.

* * *

**Part 10**

Cas was finished cutting letters out of Frederik's chest. He conjured a needle and thread and pushed it through the letters, combining them and making some sort of necklace. He walked to Frederik and hung the necklace around his neck.

He noticed how Frederik was losing conscience. His head hung down, drool came out of his mouth and he was deathly pale.

"Hey, stay up! Don't fall asleep. We're not done yet" Cas snarled and he punched Frederik in the face. Frederik opened his eyes, forgot for a second where he was, then remembered by seeing Cas.

"What are you still doing here? That chick busted you. She's going to warn the cops. You should run" Frederik mumbled uneasy.

"Anna's not going to do anything, unless she wishes to die on my hands" Cas snapped.

"I said I was sorry!" Frederik exclaimed and this time it sounded sincere. "Just let me go. I won't do it again. I promise"

"I know you won't" Cas replied mischievous. He opened Frederik's belt and pulled off his pants. He placed the sword against his cock. "I'll make sure of that" He moved the sword and Frederik let out a scream that filled the entire mansion.

Cas lifted his arm and aimed at the chains. A white light shone from his hand and the chains were broken. Frederik dropped hard on the cold basement floor and Cas heard something break. Trusting Frederik wouldn't go anywhere soon, Cas walked to the end of the basement and came back with a cage full of rats.

Frederik lifted up his head, after he'd thrown up. "What's that?" he asked scared to death.

"These guys are going to put an end to your misery" Cas said bitter and he freed the rats above Frederik.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14: The Promise**

**Part 1**

"Cas?" Meg called from the living room in the mansion. She was standing next to the corpse of the owner of the mansion.

Cas stumbled upstairs and came into the living room. He fell backwards against the wall and sank down on the carpet.

Meg quickly ran towards him and bent through her knees. She took his hands and noticed the blood on them. "Are you hurt?"

Cas shook his head. "No" he said out of breath. "It's not my blood. It's Frederik's and Marcus's" He looked at Meg, terrified.

Meg swallowed. "Did you kill them?" she asked, though she already knew the answer. Cas looked away, but Meg pinched her nails in his arms. "Did you kill them?" she repeated angry.

"I was so angry" Cas said soft. "I had my sword and I tortured him with it. He cried and begged for his life" A smile appeared on his face and he laughed. "And then I cut off his penis" he said as if he was proud of himself.

Meg let go of him in shock and ran to the basement. She noticed a body, covered with crawling and gnawing rats. Her mouth dropped open in horror. As a demon she had witnessed and caused a lot of atrocities, but this was a new one.

She walked closer to the body and saw some kind of necklace around its neck, spelling the word RAPIST. They were cut out of the chest.

Meg, starting to feel sick, walked backwards slowly until she hit something solid. Cas grabbed her arms as she turned around.

"Don't tell Sam and Dean" he begged, now frightened by his own actions. "They wouldn't understand. I didn't want this, but I had no choice. Ever since Jimmy died I've been feeling this rage and I can't stop it. And I couldn't let them go, knowing they might hurt other people like they did me"

He fell on his knees and Meg took pity on him. She bent through her knees and cupped his face, forcing him to look up.

"Please don't hate me now" he whispered sad.

"I don't hate you" Meg insured him. She glared at Frederik's corpse. "He deserved it. They all did" she said more fierce.

"Promise you won't tell anyone" Cas begged again.

"I promise" Meg said. She leaned forward and whispered in his ear: "But the next time you have unfinished business to deal with, I'd want you to involve me rather than to leave me behind"

* * *

**Part 2**

Cas and Meg left the basement and walked back into the living room.

"You should get yourself cleaned up. If Sam and Dean see the blood on your clothes, they're going to ask questions" Meg said wise.

"Then I shall use his bathroom" Cas said. "Care to join me?" he winked as he reached out his hand. Meg smiled back mischievous and accepted his hand. Cas pulled her to him and kissed her passionately. She jumped in his arms and he carried her upstairs to the bathroom. Their clothes still on Cas walked into the shower cabin and put Meg down.

Meg touched for the tap and opened it, letting out a short shriek as cold water poured over her and Cas. Cas pushed her against the wall and kissed her neckline.

Meg, who closed her eyes to enjoy the touch of Cas' lips on her skin even more, opened the buttons on his shirt and pulled it over his arms.

"Hang on" she said breathless and Cas reluctantly stopped kissing her. She took off her upper clothing and the moment she dropped her bra Cas pulled her towards him again. He unbuttoned her pants and she did the same to him.

"Why can't we do this every day?" Meg panted as Cas' fingers touched her down there.

"What? Kill a bunch of useless douche bags or getting in each other's pants?" Cas asked.

"Both" Meg replied. "Okay, are you going to do me or are you just going to keep teasing me?"

Cas lifted her in his arms and walked out of the cabin. He carried her out of the bathroom and into the first bedroom they encountered.

He lay her on the bed and touched and kissed her on all her favorite places. He pinned her arms against the mattress and went inside her.

A few minutes later Meg was satisfied and she wanted to get up. But Cas wasn't ready and so he pushed her back down.

"Cas, stop. What are you doing?" Meg panicked as Cas slid deeper and moved his hips forward. She struggled underneath him, but Cas only tightened his grip.

"Stop fighting" Cas groaned. "I'm almost there. The less you resist, the sooner it's over"

Meg stopped fighting and Cas' movements accelerated as did his breathing.

Cas stopped and got off Meg, who rubbed her wrists and cast him an angry glance. Cas raised his eyebrows.

"Don't pretend you didn't love it" he scoffed. "You can tell me to stop all you want, but we both know you wanted me to keep going"

Meg's anger and shock vanished. He was right. Demon or human, she liked it rough. Cas walked to the closet and opened it.

"Now let's check out their wardrobe" he suggested. "We can't run around naked. That would draw too much attention"

* * *

**Part 3**

Dean opened the door of the mansion and he and Sam entered. Anna had told them where to find Cas.

Dean walked into the living room and saw the old man on the carpet, his eyes wide open. Sam pulled out his gun and so did Dean.

"Cas?" Dean called.

Meg's eyes widened and Cas quickly covered her mouth. He pulled her behind the closet. "Hush" he whispered and he removed his hand.

Dean looked at Sam and signed he'd search upstairs and Sam would search downstairs. Dean sneaked upstairs and listened carefully.

Sam ran downstairs into the basement and became sick when he saw the two corpses.

"Are you afraid of heights?" Cas whispered in Meg's ear. Meg shook her head. "Okay" Cas ran quietly to the door and closed it carefully. "I love people who keep a lock on their door" he whispered as he turned the key.

Dean entered the bathroom and saw the clothes in the shower cabin. He bent through his knees and picked some up. He recognized them and realized both Cas and Meg were here or had been here and it wasn't hard to figure out what they had been doing. He left the bathroom and wanted to open the closest bedroom, which was locked.

"Cas?" Dean shouted and banged the door. "I know you're in there. And I know Meg's in there, too"

Cas opened the window and he and Meg climbed over the edge.

Dean aimed at the lock and shot. The door opened and he walked inside. There was no one, but the window stood wide open.

Sam walked back upstairs. Everyone in the basement was dead. Halfway the stairs he stopped as he heard the engines of the Impala running. There was no way Dean would leave without him, so he raced upstairs.

Dean ran towards the window, just in time to see his baby driving away.

"Son of a bitch!" he cursed.

* * *

**Part 4**

"Can you believe this?" Dean exclaimed furious. "That's what? The third time he stole my baby? What is wrong with him?"

He and Sam were walking down the street and while Dean kept ranting on about how Cas was abusing his car, Sam remained rather quiet.

"What's up with you?" Dean asked when he paused his venting for a moment.

"You didn't go into that basement" Sam said dark.

"Why? What was there?" Dean demanded to know.

"Two men. Dead. One of them tortured and eaten by rats" Sam answered. "The other one stabbed to death"

Dean sighed and looked around to make sure no one was listening along.

"You think it's Leviathan?" he asked Sam. Sam pulled his shoulders.

"I don't know, Dean, but it sure as hell is something. Cas wouldn't do that" he replied confident.

"Anna said she'd seen him cutting out letters from a man's chest" Dean said. "What more proof do you need?"

"Then what do you suggest? Hand him over to the police?" Sam asked.

"No. We'll find him and lock him up, until we figure out what's gotten into him" Dean responded.

* * *

**Part 5**

"You are amazing! You totally ditched them!" Meg said full admiration. She was driving the Impala. She didn't have the keys, but she didn't need them. Just because she was human, didn't mean she was a saint. "So, where do you want to go?" she asked, looking at Cas.

Cas pulled a paper out of his jacket and opened it. "I need to find these people, in the exact order" Cas said serious.

Meg took the paper out of his hand and studied it, while trying to keep an eye on the road. "Who are they?" she asked curious.

"People who've wronged me" Cas explained bitter. "People who need to do penance"

"Are you going to kill everyone on that list?" Meg asked careful.

"Of course not" Cas replied obvious. "First I will make them suffer. Then I will kill them"

Meg gave him back his paper and looked back at the road.

"What's wrong?" Cas asked confused. "What's the problem?"

"You are" Meg said after a while and she pulled over. She looked at Cas. "This whole 'they're going to pay for what they did to me' is not you! You're not the vengeful type"

"Maybe I wasn't when I was still an angel, but as an angel I've never been…Doesn't matter. I thought you were on my side. Why change your mind now? Are you scared or something?" Cas asked desperate.

When he saw the look on Meg's face, he understood and he took her hands in his. "I am not a…psychopath. I'm not taking these lives, because I enjoy it. They all tried to ruin my life in their own way. I promise I will stop when everyone on that list is dead"

"Well, then we better start right away" Meg replied casual as she started driving again.

* * *

**Part 6**

Mrs. Jones was cleaning the breakfast table when someone rang the bell. She put the dishes on the dresser and walked to the front door. She opened and froze.

"You" she said weak when seeing Cas.

"Hello, Mrs. Jones" Cas said friendly. "Can I come in, please?"

"I…I don't know, Mr…" Mrs. Jones stammered reluctant.

"Novak. Castiel Novak" Cas introduced himself. He nodded at Meg. "This is Meg Masters. She's a close friend. Please, Mrs. Jones, I just want to talk to you"

Mrs. Jones sighed. "Fine, then" she said and she let them in. She led them to the kitchen where she offered them to sit down. Cas looked around and whistled admiring.

"I see you've made some changes" he noticed. "Did you win the lottery?"

Mrs. Jones' cheeks turned pink. "No, someone gave me the money"

"Why would someone do that?" Meg asked, taking a chocolate biscuit from the plate Mrs. Jones had put on table.

"Because they wanted me to testify against you" Mrs. Jones confessed ashamed.

"So, basically, you didn't mind putting an innocent man in jail as long as you had a good life?" Meg summarized.

"Not me, my son" Mrs. Jones defended herself. "I didn't mind putting an innocent man in jail as long as my son had a good life"

"You realize that if it wasn't for Cas, your son would have no life at all?" Meg reminded Mrs. Jones in a calm, yet sinister voice.

"I know that" Mrs. Jones replied slowly and careful. "But you don't know what it's like. I wanted to give my son the future he deserves and if that meant I had to do something really bad, then so be it. I'm not proud of that, but let's face it. You were found innocent" she said, looking desperate at Cas, trying to find some understanding. "When you have children of your own, you will understand"

Meg looked at her flat tummy, wondering if she should tell Cas. She shook her head and came back to earth.

"Yeah, see, there's been a little problem with that" she said sweet, yet baleful. "Some people believed your crap testimony and decided to penalize Cas anyway"

"I'm really sorry" Mrs. Jones said weak, not liking the way this conversation was going.

"Where's little Jerrick?" Cas changed the subject.

"At school" Mrs. Jones answered careful.

"Good" Cas commented smiling. "We don't want to traumatize him with the sight of his ripped open mother"

* * *

**Part 7**

Mrs. Jones tried to get up, but Cas pushed her back down on the chair. "Meg, why don't you go check the car? I'm sure there's some useful stuff in there"

"Be right back" Meg smiled and she went away.

"You don't have to do this" Mrs. Jones insisted. "You can take your girl and leave and we can all pretend you were never here"

"You like to pretend, don't you?" Cas noted. He heard the door close and Meg running back into the kitchen, holding up ropes.

"Is this useful?" she smirked. Cas nodded with his head and Meg walked to him.

"Tie her hands to the arm-rests" Cas ordered and Meg did what he said. When Mrs. Jones was tied onto her chair Cas pulled two chairs, one for Meg, one for himself and they both sat down. "When is your son coming home, Mrs. Jones?" Cas asked polite.

Mrs. Jones pressed her lips tightly. Whatever these two psycho's were going to do with her, she was not putting Jerrick in any jeopardy.

"Mrs. Jones, it's really the best if you just answer the question" Meg advised the woman. Mrs. Jones looked up, hate burning in her eyes and she spat in Meg's face. As Meg wiped the spit off her face, Cas jumped up and slapped Mrs. Jones in the face, making her head turn sideward.

"That wasn't nice, was it? What happened to your hospitality, Mrs. Jones?" Cas asked in a calm voice, though it took him some effort. "Maybe we should set up a few rules. When we ask you a question, you answer it. No insulting actions. Am I clear?"

Mrs. Jones nodded and Cas smiled.

"I knew you were a smart woman" he said. "Now, when does your son get home? See, I realize you don't mind me beating you black and blue, but if you don't give me the answer Meg is going to be really pissed and she will feel obligated to elaborate on your son"

Mrs. Jones looked up scared. "No. Leave him out of this. He's got nothing to do with this" she begged, her eyes getting wet.

"He has everything to do with this" Cas replied soft. " You involved him by testifying that I-how was it again? Oh, I remember-had my hands all over him. Look, Mrs. Jones, I would never hurt a child. So you just tell us when and where to pick up Jerrick and that's that. We won't hurt him. It's not his fault his mother is a lying bitch, now is it?"

"Do you promise my son will be left unharmed?" she asked putting accent to every word.

"Mrs. Jones, unlike you I'm very well capable of keeping my word" Cas responded. He looked at Meg. "Could you find me a piece of paper and a pen?"

Meg stood up and searched the drawers, until she found the utensils Cas required. She gave them to Cas who put the pen in Mrs. Jones right hand.

"You're going to write a note, giving Meg permission to pick up Jerrick"

* * *

**Part 8**

Cas gave the note to Meg. "Keep it somewhere safe" he warned her and she put it in her pocket. "Hey, Meg, have you checked the top floor? I think you should. Who knows what treasures you might find"

Meg saw how Cas was gazing at Mrs. Jones and realized he was about to get really started. "Can I take whatever I want?" she asked in a serious tone.

"Absolutely. Knock yourself out" Cas permitted her as if Mrs. Jones possessions belonged to him. Meg left the room and Cas put his chair closer to Mrs. Jones.

"Alone at last" he said soft.

"Listen, you can still go back" Mrs. Jones insisted. "Nothing major has happened yet. Just untie me and leave and we'll leave it at that. I promise I will keep my mouth shut. You're a healer. You're not a killer"

"Really? Because I'm fairly certain that I killed three men last night" Cas commented casually, with that same undertone of pride. "The first I strangled to death, using only one hand. The second I stabbed to death. And the third, well,…I didn't really kill him. The rats did that for me"

Mrs. Jones made a weird throat sound.

"You're crazy" she said shaking. "You can't just take lives. There's nothing that gives you the right to do these things. The police will find you and they will finish you and you deserve it"

"There's absolutely no need for you to talk anymore" Cas ignored her.

"Who're you going to kill after me?" Mrs. Jones snapped hostile. "Don't you see you're just as bad? None of this will make you feel better"

"I guess you're a slow learner" Cas replied softly as he lay his hands on her arms. Slowly but surely Mrs. Jones body warmed up and blisters appeared over her entire body. "I told you to shut up"

* * *

**Part 9**

School was out and Jerrick walked to the gate. He didn't see his mother anywhere, but a strange woman came his way.

"Hi, Jerrick" Meg said charming when she reached the eight year old. Jerrick took a few steps back. "Don't be afraid. I know you don't know me, but do you remember being sick and a man made you feel better?"

Jerrick nodded heavily.

"I'm a very good friend of that man. He's visiting your mom and I was so kind to come and pick you up" Meg explained.

Jerrick's teacher walked towards them.

"Is there a problem?" she asked suspicious.

"No, I'm just picking the boy up" Meg responded.

"Who are you? I've never seen you around before. I can't let my students leave with a stranger" the teacher said.

"Oh, right, hang on" Meg said and she searched her pockets. She conjured the note and gave it to the teacher, who opened it and read it.

"Seems alright" the teacher said. "My apologies, Miss Masters. I hope you understand. We can't take any chances"

"Of course" Meg replied sweet. She reached her hand out. "Are you coming?" Jerrick reluctantly accepted her hand and let her drag him along.

Ten minutes later they were back at Mrs. Jones house. Meg entered and pushed Jerrick inside. "Go upstairs. Your mom is talking" she ordered and she forced Jerrick to walk upstairs. He walked to his bedroom and sank down on the bed.

"Now, you stay here, until it's dark. Then you can come out" she said, before walking out of the room.

* * *

**Part 10**

Meg entered the kitchen and saw how Mrs. Jones was bleeding over her entire body. Cas was holding her arms and stared at her.

"Cas?" Meg asked careful, breaking Cas' concentration. He let go of Mrs. Jones and turned his head to Meg.

"Are you sure you want to be here, right now, Meg?" he asked a little annoyed. "It's about to get messy"

"Are you kidding?" Meg scoffed. "I was a demon for centuries. I love messy"

Cas smiled an evil smile, one that Meg had never seen on his face before, and his eyes were cold as he looked back at Mrs. Jones.

"You know you're going to die, right?" he asked in a serious tone as if he was a doctor who tells his patient they have cancer.

Mrs. Jones scarcely nodded as tears rolled over her eyes and cheeks.

"Is there anything you want to say before you die?" Cas asked softly, wiping away her tears.

Mrs. Jones blinked and swallowed, before she whispered: "Don't kill me. I understand that what I did hurt you, but Jerrick needs me. I'm all he's left. He's just a boy. It's not right to take his mother from him"

Cas was taken aback from that declaration of love from mother to son.

"I won't tell anyone I've seen you. I promise" Mrs. Jones insisted.

"I know you won't" Cas replied and he conjured a pocket knife. " 'Cause I won't let you" He forced Mrs. Jones to open her mouth and cut off her tongue. Mrs. Jones' screaming filled the entire house and Jerrick wanted to go help his mom, but he was locked up in his room.

Cas stood and signed at Meg. "We're done here. Let's go"

"You're letting her live?" Meg asked surprised.

"She's right. I can't kill a mother" Cas replied shrugging. "Now come on, let's go" He walked to the front door and Meg closed it.

As soon as the door was shut Mrs. Jones felt her body heating up from the inside. Her skin turned red and blisters appeared again.

Cas had lied to her. He wasn't going to let her live. The kind man who had saved her son from dying an untimely death was gone and all that was left of him was an unscrupulous monster.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15: The Pin-cushion **

**Part 1**

Cas parked his car in front of Heather's house. He looked at Meg.

"Are you tired?" he asked concerned. He pointed at Heather's house. "Maybe your ex-colleague will give you a place to sleep"

"What about you? You're not leaving me here, are you?" Meg said a little worried. Cas unbuckled and got out of the car. Meg did the same. They walked to the front door and knocked.

Five minutes later Heather opened the door.

"Meg! Cas! What are you guys doing here?" she exclaimed surprised.

"Can we come in?" Meg asked.

"Sure" Heather replied and she stepped aside, to let them pass. "I didn't expect to see you ever again. Not after…"

"Oh, that" Cas said cheerful. "All is forgiven. We should all move past that"

"Wow, you're…generous" Heather noted. She turned around and walked them to the living room. "Have a seat" she offered and Cas and Meg sank down on the couch. "Can I get you anything? Beer, water, soda?"

"I'm good" Cas refused and Meg didn't say anything.

"Okay" Heather slowly nodded. "Eh…would you mind if I get a drink myself?" she asked a little nervous.

"Of course not" Meg said sweet and Heather headed to the kitchen. She conjured her cell phone and dialed Isabel's number. The former inspector wasn't reachable, so Heather left a message. "Is, Castiel and Meg are here. Can you please come as soon as you hear this message? And please bring your gun"

"Is there a problem?"

Heather dropped her phone and turned around quickly. Cas was standing behind her and she had no idea how much he'd heard.

"No" she said trembling.

Cas pointed behind him. "Meg's not feeling very well. Can she lie down somewhere?"

"Yeah" Heather said breathless. "Just up the stairs, third room on the right. That's the spare room"

"Thank you" Cas smiled and he returned to the living room.

* * *

**Part 2**

Cas slammed the door of the spare room and turned to Meg. "Are you tired?" he repeated his previous question.

"Not even a little" Meg beamed. "I forgot how…awakening it feels to take a life" She laughed and kissed Cas passionately. "I also forgot how it turns me on" She started to open the buttons of his shirt, but Cas took her hand.

"Not now, Meg" he said serious and Meg looked as if he'd slapped her.

"Why not?" Meg asked morose. The Cas she knew didn't say no to her. Not for this.

"We have to be careful" Cas insisted. "I busted Heather into calling someone and I'm pretty sure it's inspector Roberts. She'll come here, which is good, because she's on the list, but first we have to kill Heather. When they're both dead , we can have as much sex as you want, but right now we need to focus"

Meg nodded. "You're right" she said. "And come to think of it, I do feel a bit tired. So, I'll just take a nap while you deal with the crack whore downstairs" She took off her T-shirt and dropped it at Cas' feet. As she walked to the bed, Cas said: "What are you doing?"

"Hmm?" she asked, acting innocent as she climbed in the bed. She took off her shoes and socks and dropped them on the ground. Her pants followed and Cas looked away. "Cas, what's wrong? You're acting like you've never seen a girl before"

"I know what you're trying to do" Cas said accusatory as he slowly walked towards the bed. "You're trying to seduce me"

"Is it working?" Meg asked, trembling from excitement, as she sat up her knees and opened Cas' belt.

"Yes" Cas replied with heavy voice and he stepped in bed.

* * *

**Part 3**

While Cas put his clothes back on Meg wrapped the sheets around her and walked towards the door.

"Where you going?" Cas asked.

"Going to take a look in Heather's wardrobe. I don't like these clothes" Meg replied and she left the room. Cas took advantage of Meg's absence to look around in the room. He lifted the mattress, opened the closets and threw all its content on the floor. He pulled the drawers open and threw them on the bed.

"Where is it, Heather? Where do you keep it?" Cas mumbled as he kept looking.

Meg opened the closet in Heather's bedroom and checked her wardrobe. There were so many clothes it was hard to choose from. Eventually she picked out a dark blue dress. She took of the clothes she had stolen from the old man and put on the dress, feeling like a girl again. She bent through her knees and checked the boxes that were on the bottom of the closet. Shoes.

Meg picked out a pair with heels and put them on. She would've never wear any of this had she still been a demon. She put the box back and rose. When she was closing the closet her eye fell on something. Another box, but it was put away in such way that it seemed no one was supposed to find. Meg picked it up and opened it, revealing Heather's heroin stock.

"What's that?"

Meg looked up; Cas was standing in the doorway and he was looking at the box. The only thing he had eyes for apparently. He walked toward her and looked in the box.

"I've been looking for this" he said and he smiled at Meg. "You found it, well done" He took the box and walked downstairs.

* * *

**Part 4**

Heather was pacing up and down the kitchen, nervously waiting for Isabel to call her back. She couldn't imagine what kept her so long. She didn't have a job, she didn't have a boyfriend anymore. She was probably wallowing in self-pity, while Heather was about to be ripped to pieces, according to the newspaper.

She dialed Isabel's phone again and growled when it was her voicemail again. "Seriously? Where the hell are you? Cas is here. What part of get here ASAP did you not get? Don't you read the newspaper? He's a lunatic. He's killed four people already in less than 48 hours and if you don't hurry up I'm going to be next"

"Heather?"

Heather startled and hung up. She turned around and forced a smile.

"You seem a little on edge. Something bothering you?" Cas asked acting concerned.

"What? No, no, eh, I'm just trying to reach a friend" Heather explained truthfully.

"A friend? Inspector Roberts, perhaps?" Cas took a wild guess and Heather stiffened.

"Former inspector" Heather corrected him weakly and could slap herself for revealing such information.

Cas smiled. "I couldn't help but overhearing part of your conversation" he said apologizing. "What was that about me killing four people in less than 48 hours? How do you know that?"

He's not even denying it, Heather realized downright scared to death. Cas looked over her shoulder and noticed the newspaper. His profile was on the front page.

"Well, that explains it" he said rather cheerful and he looked up. He knew the angels were behind this.

"What are you doing with that?" Heather asked, trying to pull herself together. "You can have it. It's yours, but then please get out"

"Yeah, I don't think so" Cas replied. "Why leave now? The fun's just getting started"

"What?" Heather said confused, having no chance to add anything else, since Meg pierced a syringe in her neck. She lost her balance and Meg caught her.

* * *

**Part 5**

"Hey, wake up" Cas ordered as he tapped Heather in the face. Heather blinked and slowly opened her eyes. She lied tied onto the kitchen table, bare naked. She tried to move, but felt rather weak and numb.

"You know, you should really consider who you're inviting in your house. There are so many crazy people walking around" Cas said sarcastic. He stared down at Heather's naked body. "I should take advantage of you now, like you did with me"

Heather moaned from fear and Cas gladly responded to it. He let his fingers slowly slide across her soft skin and felt it heat up. He stopped and turned to Meg, who blushed.

"But I think that would only bring you pleasure, not the pain and humiliation you deserve" he said dry and cold. "Besides, I'm spoken for" He signed at Meg and she came closer to him. "Grab a needle, sweetheart, you get the first shot"

Meg took a syringe from the pile and looked unsure at Cas, who nodded encouraging. She hesitated. As a demon she'd had no conscious and torturing and killing had been easy, but now she hesitated.

However, as she saw Cas stand so closely to the woman who had slept with him, she felt a fury killing every doubt she had and drove the syringe in her right breast. As Heather screamed from pain, Cas laughed.

"Nice choice of body part"

* * *

**Part 6**

Isabel was sitting at the bar of the local pub, trying to get some information.

"Can I get the usual, Neil?" she asked casual. Neil prepared a coke zero and gave it to her. "Hey, I heard a few nasty things went down here. Could you tell me a little more about it?"

"Not here" Neil corrected her. "Outside"

"I heard some of you regulars were murdered. Does the police have any suspects?" Isabel asked, pretending to be just curious.

"Yeah" Neil said obvious. "A lot of my customers saw him provoking them here. They went after him and didn't return. Need I say more?"

"Who are you talking about?" Isabel asked, now eager to know.

"I don't know his name, it's such an odd one" Neil mumbled as he looked under his bar. He found the newspaper and held it up so Isabel could read the front page.

Part of her wanted to rejoice. Something was up with this guy and this time he wouldn't get away with it.

But another part told her not to be premature. She had accused Cas of many things and he turned out to be innocent each time.

However, one thing's for sure. Cas was in the middle of something really horrifying and Isabel wouldn't be Isabel if she decided to watch at the side line.

* * *

**Part 7**

Heather's upper body was covered with needles and each time Meg thought they'd reached the bottom the needles miraculously piled up.

Heather turned her head carefully to her ex-colleague. "Please, make him stop. I've done nothing wrong" she cried quietly.

"You made me a drugs addict" Cas reminded her. "I bashed my own head against a toilet and I almost got Meg killed, because of your needles"

"I'm sorry" Heather said weak. "I just wanted to help you, I swear"

Cas grabbed another needle and drove it in her thy, making Heather moan, which made Meg shiver.

"Don't you think that's enough?" she said careful.

"No" Cas snapped back. "It'll be enough when there are no more needles left"

"But they keep piling up!" Meg exclaimed.

"They'll stop piling up when the whore's death" Cas clarified.

Meg shook her head in horror. "What has gotten into you?"

* * *

**Part 8**

Isabel got in her car and started the engines.

"Hello, Isabel"

Isabel jumped up and screamed. She looked behind, over her shoulder, but there was no one to see.

"I'm going crazy" she mumbled and she rubbed her eyes. She hadn't been sleeping very well, not with everything that was going on.

"You're not going crazy" the voice commented. "You can't see me, but you can obviously hear me. My name is Anna and I'm an angel"

Isabel shook her head. This was impossible.

"I see you have trouble believing so" Anna noted. "However, I need you to get over the shock and listen carefully. You want to find Cas. I can help you with that. Take a look in your rear view"

Isabel checked her rear view mirror and saw Heather lying on a table, dozens of syringes pierced in her naked body. Cas and Meg were standing by her.

Isabel looked behind her again, but again there was nothing and no one to see.

"Before you go you need to call Dean and Sam Winchester. And one more thing, do not touch Castiel. Take the girl, but leave Cas to me. The most important thing is that you separate them"

* * *

**Part 9**

Isabel conjured her phone and noticed she had five missed calls, all from Heather, and two voicemails. She listened to them.

"Is, Castiel and Meg are here. Can you please come as soon as you hear this message? And please bring your gun"

"Seriously? Where the hell are you? Cas is here. What part of get here ASAP did you not get? Don't you read the newspaper? He's a lunatic. He's killed four people already in less than 48 hours and if you don't hurry up I'm going to be next"

Isabel understood why Heather hadn't called the police. They would find her stock and arrest her, but now Cas and Meg would probably kill her. She dialed Dean's number and waited impatiently until he picked up.

"Dean Winchester"

"Hi, this is Isabel Roberts, I don't know if you remember me" Isabel started nervous.

"You're the cop that arrested Cas" Dean said a little cold.

"I know where he is" Isabel quickly continued. "He's at my cousin's house. He's torturing her and he's going to kill her, unless I stop him"

"Okay, Isabel, you go ahead, but don't go inside. Wait for us" Dean replied.

"She's my cousin" Isabel replied. "And I'm a cop. I can handle Castiel"

"No, you can't" Dean responded sharp. "Cas is not your everyday criminal"

"I'll take my chances" Isabel said and she hung up. She started the engines and drove full speed ahead.

* * *

**Part 10**

"Meg, could you give us a moment alone, please?" Cas demanded as he stared at Heather's bleeding body.

Meg stayed put, as if her feet were stuck on the floor. Cas walked towards her and took her hands. "Please, Meg. I have to finish this on my own. I don't want you to witness a murder"

Meg shook her head. "Fine, then. But make it quick. I'm getting jealous" she said snarky.

"Meg, you have absolutely no reason to be jealous" Cas promised her. "Now go. The sooner you leave, the sooner Heather's dead"

Meg reluctantly left the kitchen and walked into the hallway. For a moment everything was quiet. But then she heard noises. Her mouth dropped open from disgust and she stormed back into the kitchen. Cas was sitting astride on Heather, screwing her.

"No!" Meg snarled and she ran to the dresser, where she picked up a knife.

"Meg, get out!" Cas snapped angry, but Meg naturally didn't listen. She ran towards the table and drove the knife through Heather's heart. She pulled the knife out and stepped back. Cas climbed off Heather and off the table. He grabbed Meg's wrist and she dropped the knife.

"I was supposed to kill her, not you. I told you to leave" he said furious. He let go of her and raised his hand. He hit her so hard she fell down against the dresser.

The front door opened and Meg scarcely put herself up. Isabel Roberts was standing in the doorway, her gun aimed at Meg.

"Cas?" Meg moaned scared. Isabel walked quickly towards her and shot.

"Meg!" Cas exclaimed and he ran towards her. He kneeled and lifted her head.

"The cops are on their way, Mr. Novak" Isabel said trembling. "I suggest you don't try to run, or God help me, I will kill you"

Meg shook her head. "No" she said difficult. "Don't let them get to you. Run"

"Okay" Cas promised. "I'll come back for you" He lay Meg gently down and stood. He turned to Isabel and raised his hands in the air. "Alright, I'll come with you"

He walked towards her and grabbed her arm. He stole the gun and used the grip to hit Isabel on the head. She fell down unconscious and Cas threw her over his shoulder. He locked her in the trunk of her own car and placed himself behind the wheel.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16: The Last Supper**

**Part 1**

Meg opened her eyes and looked at Sam an Dean, who were sitting at her bed. They were the last two people she had expected to see. She tried to sit up, but Sam gently pushed her down on the pillow.

"Don't try to make any movements. You're still a little weak" he said.

"I thought I was dead" Meg mumbled.

"You were close, but Anna healed you. She's finally learned how to do it" Dean explained. He exchanged glances with Sam, before getting to the reason why they were there. "Meg, where is Cas?"

"I don't know" Meg lied and she looked away.

"You were with him when he killed that woman and when he killed Heather" Sam continued. "When we arrived at Heather's we only found you and Heather. No sign of Cas or Isabel. Our guess is that he took her somewhere. If you don't speak up now, another innocent person is going to die"

Meg lifted her head up. "Cas' targets are hardly innocent" she snapped with skipping voice. "They deserve what's coming to them"

"He's lost his mind. He's dangerous" Dean responded frustrated. "We need to lock him up and beat the crazy out of him"

"I don't know where he is" Meg repeated.

* * *

**Part 2**

Kevin and Alexia were lying asleep on the mattress Anna had provided them, when Cas entered the building. The two teenagers, both having a sixth sense, felt someone was staring down at them and so they opened their eyes.

"Oh, I didn't mean to wake you" Cas said, not sounding remorseful at all.

"Cas?" Kevin said strange, squeezing his eyes to make sure it really was him. He stood and so did Alexia. They realized how they must've looked like, but it really wasn't like that. "What are you doing here? No one comes here, except for Anna"

Cas nodded distract. "I'm not here to see any of you" He looked from Kevin to Alexia. "I'm here for the tablets. I know they are here, but could you point me in the right direction?"

Still sleepy, it was after all the middle of the night, Kevin pointed behind Cas. "They're right there" he mumbled and he gasped when Alexia drove her elbow in his side.

"You idiot!" she hissed. She hurried to the tablets, but Cas beat her to it. "What are you up to, uncle Cas?"

"I'm not your uncle" Cas replied cold. "You need to go back to the playground and leave the dangerous stuff to the grownups"

He put his hands on the table where the tablets were lying on and the tablets started shaking.

"What's happening?" Alexia asked urgent.

Cas didn't answer the question, but left. The shaking stopped and Alexia stared devastated at the stone crumbles that used to be tablets.

* * *

**Part 3**

Dean and Sam were in the waiting room of the hospital, both drinking coffee. There was no way any of them could sleep now.

Kevin and Alexia entered the hospital. They had informed Anna about Cas' disastrous acting and she had directed them to Sam and Dean.

"Hey" Kevin said. Sam looked up.

"Kevin! What are you doing here? I thought you were hiding from Crowley" Sam exclaimed hoarse. He was getting tired.

"Yeah, I was, but something came up" Kevin explained. He sat down next to Sam and Alexia next to Dean. "We had a little visit from our old friend Cas"

"You know where he is?" Dean asked urgent.

"Not anymore" Kevin commented. "He destroyed the tablets"

"He what?" Sam exclaimed surprised.

"He destroyed the tablets" Alexia repeated. "And then he took off. Anna went out looking for him, but she needs you two to get Meg to fess up. Get her to talk"

* * *

**Part 4**

Cas was back at his house, sitting behind a computer, sending invitations.

"I thought I might find you here" Anna said. She was standing by the doorway. "What are you doing? Making plans to kill more people?" she asked accusatory with a nod at the computer.

Cas didn't reply, but finished his work and shut the computer down.

"If you really need to know" he started while he turned around to face her. "I'm almost done. Tonight I'll be finishing what they've started and then Meg and I can live happily ever after"

"You don't honestly believe that, do you?" Anna said disbelieving. "There's a reason why I have been tracking you down, why I've been trying to talk some sense into you. They know what you're doing and if you don't put an end to your psychopathic behavior, they will.

And what they have in store is not just death. It's a lot nastier than that, so unless you want to do an eternity of penance, I suggest you get over your issues and move on"

Cas yawned, pretending not to have heard anything Anna just said. Or maybe he really hadn't heard her. "How's Meg? Is she fine? Is she alive?"

"She's okay. I healed her" Anna responded a little grumpy. "Okay, so about the angels-"

"You know what I'd like to know? Why can't they keep their nose out of my business? I'm not an angel anymore. I don't have to explain myself to them or to anyone else for that matter. Tell the angels that they can go to Hell"

* * *

**Part 5**

Cas was standing in front of the mirror, in the bathroom. He was shirtless and he held some kind of gun in his right hand. He put his arm behind his back and placed the gun against his shoulder blade.

He shot and ink came out of the gun. He made some kind of mark and repeated the process over and over again until his back was covered with a repeat of the same tattoo.

He put his arm forward and placed the gun against his chest. He repeated the process and small streams of blood ran over his thorax.

When his chest was tattooed as well, he put on his shirt, not caring about the blood. So what if anyone saw it? Sure, it would freak the hell out of them, but wasn't that exactly what Cas wanted? Fear is better than love, Cas convinced himself.

"No" Cas groaned and he held onto the lavatory. "What am I doing?" he frowned at the tattoo-gun.

You're doing what you're supposed to do. The people on your list deserve to die.

"But after that it's over" Cas told himself. "I'm not a psychopath"

You should add one more name to that list. Dean Winchester.

Cas frowned confused. "Why would I want to kill my best friend?"

Because he killed your unborn child.

* * *

**Part 6**

Several cars parked in front of the local snack bar. It was closing day, but there was light shining through the blinds and thus they walked to the entrance. They had all received an email with an invitation for a party, hosted by Castiel Novak.

After some hesitation a man opened the door and entered.

"Aaah, you came" Cas smiled as he turned around to face the crowd. The people looked around. There were drinks, appetizers, food. It really looked like a party, though they had no idea who this Castiel dude was nor why they were invited.

"Please, make yourselves at home" Cas said casual and he drank from his beer. "Oh, wait, I'm forgetting something" He snapped with his finger and a second later there was rock music playing.

Some random girl walked to the plate and took one of the appetizers. She looked at Cas.

"Oh my God, is that blood?" she exclaimed shocked. Cas looked at his shirt. "As a matter of fact it is"

The girl stared at the blood stains for a little while longer. "That is so cool"

"For a moment I was afraid you were going to scream" Cas commented dark.

"What would you do if I did scream?" the girl asked curious and a little intrigued.

"Then I would have to kill you" Cas said serious. The girl swallowed and backed away a little. Then Cas laughed. "I'm kidding" he reassured her. "How old are you?"

"Fifteen" the girl answered.

"Hmm" Cas sighed interested. "Want to make out?"

"I guess" the girl responded uncertain.

"Come on" Cas said and he dragged her along to the restrooms. He slammed the door and pushed the girl against it.

"Wait, what are you doing?" the girl asked in fear when Cas opened his belt. "I've never done it before" she said quickly, thinking that would stop him. She tried to get out, but the door was stuck.

"Ssshh" Cas whispered. "If you don't struggle, it might not even hurt"

When he almost reached the top he grabbed the girl by her throat.

"Do you know why you were invited?" he asked sinister. "A while ago I was here with some friends. I was sick. Dean had to carry me outside and it wasn't easy. This place was full of customers, but none of them stood up to give Dean a hand.

I remember you sitting there, chatting with your friends, and as Dean and I passed your table you didn't do anything. You just sat there and stared at us. And then you went on chatting"

He let go of the girl and zipped his pants. Then he grabbed her hair and dragged her to a wall. He tightened his grip and brought her face close to his.

"You shouldn't have come. This isn't a party" he bashed her head against the wall, again and again and again, until she dropped dead on the floor. "It's a massacre"

* * *

**Part 7**

The door to the bathroom opened and Cas walked outside. He carried the girl over his shoulder, like a pig he just shot. He dropped her on the bar, causing the plates with food and drinks to fall on the floor.

"Dinner's up!" he shouted.

At first no one moved as they were too shocked by what just had happened. But then the silence was broken by a scream and people started running towards the exit.

Cas snapped his fingers and the doors locked themselves.

"I'm sure you all wonder what you're doing here? Let me refresh your memory" he said. He snapped with his fingers again and darkness fell. The only light came from the left wall, where a movie was being played.

When the movie was done, Cas snapped his fingers again and the light turned back on.

"Each and every one of you were there that day, but none of you would even consider helping me. You just looked at me and figured the child-rapist of Colorado didn't deserve any better" Cas said bitter.

A man made a few steps forward.

"I remember that day and I remember you" he started. "I really wish I had done something. There's not a day that goes by that I think about that day and I'm grateful that I now have the chance to say how much I regret it"

"Stop talking" Cas said and he drove his hand through the man's chest, ripping his heart out. He threw the organ on the ground next to the body of its owner. "Let's get this over with" Cas said and he climbed on the bar, kicking the dead girl on the floor. He spread his arms and a blinding light radiated from his body, and he opened his mouth to let out an extremely high pitched voice.

* * *

**Part 8**

Anna landed inside Meg's hospital room and she didn't seem very happy. She walked towards the bed and stared furious at Meg, who pretended to be asleep.

"I hope you're proud of yourself. You made yourself accessory to murder. I just had a message from the angels saying there's been a bloodbath somewhere here in town, but no one has any idea where dear Castiel is. So, you better start talking before I lose the chipper attitude"

She left, when Dean and Sam entered. Meg sat up.

"There's a list" she started.

"Go on" Dean said.

"With names. Names of people he's going to kill" Meg continued. "He promised he'd stop when everyone on that list was gone"

"And you believed him" Dean commented demeaning.

"Whose names were on that list? Besides those three men and Heather" Sam insisted.

"I don't know" Meg replied frustrated. "I only saw it once. There were a whole lot of names on there. All I know is that they have mistreated him one way or the other. And he also told me he was going to throw a party in the local snack bar"

"Which was probably meant metaphorically" Dean commented. "Come on, Sam, we have a party to go to"

Ten seconds after they left Cas appeared next to Meg's bed, causing her to scream. He quickly laid his hand on her mouth, muting her.

"You came back" Meg whispered after Cas removed his hand.

"I promised I would" Cas replied obvious. "Why are you still here? Anna told me she'd healed you"

"Sam and Dean won't let me leave. They're watching me like hellhounds" Meg explained.

"Well, they're gone now" Cas responded happy. "So you can come with me. I have a surprise for you" he added mischievous.

* * *

**Part 9**

Dean parked the Impala as close to the local snack bar as possible. There was yellow tape around the building and the police and medical staff were there, too.

"Looks like we're too late" Sam said defeated. They got out of the car and walked towards the sealed building.

Dean held up his fake ID, as did Sam, when a cop blocked their way.

"Mind if we take a look?" Dean asked. The cop let them through and Dean and Sam stepped underneath the yellow tape. They walked inside the building and even though they were used to seeing dead people, what they walked into was still a lot to digest.

There were bodies everywhere and they all looked the same. Eyes burned out, blood coming out of their ears.

"Only an angel could've done this" Sam realized.

"Cas is not an angel anymore" Dean replied.

"Unless he is" Sam added. "Think about it, Dean. Gary was strangled to death, you saw the prints on his throat. Then both Frederik and Marcus were abducted. How did Cas do that if he was still human? Anna hasn't been able to track him down. And Kevin told us he destroyed the tablets by causing a local earthquake"

"Hey"

Sam turned around and a young man stood behind him.

"I saw what happened" the man said trembling. "It was awful"

"Just sit down" Sam said considerate and the man sat down. "Tell us what you saw"

"I got an email today with an invitation to a party, from some guy named Castiel Novak. I had no idea who he was, so I didn't trust it and I decided not to go. But after a while curiosity got the best of me and I went anyway" he paused.

"Then what happened?" Dean urged.

"I was standing outside, looking in. There was a man, I suppose that was Castiel, and he kicked a girl on the floor. From where I was standing she looked dead. Then he spread his arms and his entire body seemed to radiate. He opened his mouth and I don't know what he was saying, but everyone just covered their ears and screamed. And then they were all dead"

Sam and Dean exchanged looks.

"Thank you. You've been really helpful" Sam said. Him and Dean left the snack bar.

"You're right, Sammy" Dean admitted. "Cas has his powers back"

* * *

**Part 10**

Meg sat next to Cas while he was driving Isabel's car, though she didn't know that.

"How did you get in my room?" she asked slightly nervous.

"What do you mean?" Cas asked distracted.

"You appeared out of nowhere. I want to know how you did it" Meg insisted.

"Anna helped me" Cas shrugged, hoping that would explain it all to his partner in crime. However, it didn't.

"Anna?" she frowned. "No. No, Anna wouldn't have left you alone with me. She's been tracking you down since you left Sam and Dean to go on a murder spree"

Cas cast her a furious glance and for a moment Meg feared he was going to slap her again. But then he took a deep breath and restrained himself.

"What does it matter? We're finally together again. I have one more person to kill and then we can go back home"

He stopped the car at the haven and stepped out. He signaled to Meg and she followed him to a row of containers. He walked to the fourth one and unlocked it.

Even though it was dark inside and not much light was going in, Meg still recognized Isabel Roberts. Cas walked towards the woman and uncovered her mouth. "Do you know why I put you here?"

Isabel knew she was going to die. Dean Winchester was right; Cas was not your everyday criminal. She looked up and said fierce: "Because I tried to get a monster convicted" Her cheek burned as Cas slapped her with the back of his hand.

"I put you here, because when you arrested me you put me in the isolation cell. Kind of a strange policy, don't you think?"

"I'm not going to apologize for doing my job" Isabel replied bitter and proud.

"Trying to get an innocent man convicted, is you doing your job?" Cas spit out.

"You're not innocent" Isabel commented cold. "Not anymore. Are you going to kill me yet or do you need some time to whine about how I wronged you? Maybe you can shed a few tears"

"I'm not going to kill you" Cas smiled suddenly.

"You're not?" Meg asked slightly confused.

"No" Cas turned to her and conjured Isabel's gun, which he put in Meg's hands. "You are"

Meg looked afraid from the gun to Cas. She had enjoyed seeing Cas murder people to a certain level, but she hadn't killed anyone since she turned human.

"I saved her for you, sweetie" Cas said excited. "She hurt you and now you can pay her back. Just shoot her"

Meg aimed the gun at Isabel, then averted her head to Cas.

"I..I can't" she stammered helpless. "I'm sorry"

Cas jerked the gun out of her shaking hands, aimed at Isabel and killed her in cold blood.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17: Kiss of Judas**

**Part 1**

Cas parked the stolen car in front of their house.

"Home sweet home" he said softly and smiled at Meg, who smiled back nervously. He got out of the car and walked to the front door.

After a few seconds Meg followed him, but still kept her distance. Cas opened the door and stopped Meg from going in.

"There's someone here. I can feel it" he whispered baleful. He grabbed Meg's wrist and pulled her along. "Hello?" he called, but no one answered. Then he heard someone strike a match and he pushed Meg away.

The next moment he was surrounded by a holy circle and the fire illuminated the room.

"Welcome home, Cas" Dean said dark.

"What are you doing?" Cas asked confused, looking from Dean to Sam. Sam turned to Meg.

"Thanks for the tip" he said. Meg felt Cas' eyes on her, but she didn't dare looking up.

"You sold me out" he realized disgusted. "Why would you do that?"

"I had no choice. You're not acting like yourself" Meg replied trembling.

"What makes you think that? The fact that I killed a bunch of useless people?"

"No" Meg said, looking up. "The fact that you called me sweetie tonight"

"What's wrong with that? I give you a nickname and you call the fun police?"

"You never call me sweetie" Meg explained.

* * *

**Part 2**

"This is ridiculous" Cas said snarky.

"Really? Then why do you keep standing there?" Dean asked.

"Because there's fire around me" Cas exclaimed frustrated.

"If you're not an angel, you can just step out of the circle" Sam replied simple. "Just be a man, Cas, and step out of the circle"

Cas turned to Meg, who looked back fierce. "You're going to be sorry for this" he hissed.

"Maybe you can add my name on that stupid list" Meg snapped back.

"And maybe you can crawl back into the hole you came from, you mentally challenged slut!" Cas yelled and his eyes glowed from malicious pleasure as he saw Meg cringe.

"Meg, why don't you leave us alone for a bit?" Sam suggested wisely. "Maybe you can crash at some friend's place?"

"What friends?" Meg snapped. "No, this is my house, too and I'm not going to let him throw me out" she nodded at Cas.

"Suit yourself, bitch" Cas insulted her. Furious Meg walked towards him, with the intention to punch some manners into him.

"Meg, stay back" Sam warned her, but naturally she didn't listen. She aimed her fist at Cas' face, but he grabbed it and with his other hand he gripped her throat.

"Cas, let go of her" Dean said sharp, surprised by himself that he was trying to protect the woman he used to despise.

"Why? She's just a demon. Once a bad guy, always a bad guy. Besides" Cas smiled manipulative at Dean. "are you sure you don't want me to eliminate the only person standing between us?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about" Dean said casual and he walked towards Cas and Meg. "Let her go"

Cas pulled his hand away and Meg ran away upstairs.

* * *

**Part 3**

Cas sank down in Indian style and reached out to the flames, which didn't seem to affect him at all.

"I'll go see how Meg's doing" Sam said softly and he left Dean alone with Cas.

"Alone at last" Cas smiled slowly.

"Why did you do it, Cas? Why did you kill so many people?" Dean asked hurt.

Cas looked down and played with his fingers. "I didn't" he mumbled defensive. "I told Meg I was going to kill them all, to impress her, to sound like a bad guy. But she never actually saw me kill anyone. Okay, I killed those three men. But, Dean,…they raped me. You can't possibly understand how fucked up I am, because of that. But I didn't kill anyone else. Meg killed Heather, go ask her"

"What about those customers in the snack bar?" Dean asked.

"That was an accident" Cas swore. "It was then that I got my powers back. First we were all having fun, then suddenly I'm glowing with power and next thing everyone is dead. I knew how you would react, which is why I ran"

"So you admit that you have your powers back?" Dean said, raising his eyebrows. Cas pulled his shoulders.

"What can I say? I can't lie to you" he whispered and he pierced his glance in Dean's eyes. Dean took a step back, but Cas grabbed his shirt and pressed his lips against Deans.

* * *

**Part 4**

Sam knocked Meg's bedroom door and opened it slowly. Meg was sitting on the bed in Indian style, a blue bag of M&M's in her lap.

"Can I come in?" Sam asked careful. Meg shrugged and Sam closed the door. "That was…pretty intense"

Meg swallowed a handful of colored candy in response.

"I wouldn't take it personal" Sam continued as he sat on the bed. "I think he's freaking out, because we found out he has his powers back. Dean's with him now. If there's anyone who can talk some sense into Cas, it's my big brother"

"Thank you, that makes me feel a lot better" Meg commented sarcastically.

"That's not what I meant" Sam sighed. "Look, Meg, you said it yourself. Cas is not acting like himself"

Downstairs Cas let go of Dean, but Dean pulled Cas back for a second lip lock. He closed his eyes, while his mind was screaming: "Stop! What the hell are you doing? This is wrong!"

"You're right" Meg said fierce. "There's obviously something wrong with Cas and he needs our help and sitting here, stuffing myself with M&M's that passed the expiration date is not going to solve anything"

She jumped off the bed and walked outside her room, downstairs.

Cas and Dean separated from each other. Dean backed away, confused by what he'd just done. He rotated his head and saw Sam and Meg standing in the doorway. Judging by their shocked expressions they had seen too much to come up with excuses like 'it's not what you think'

* * *

**Part 5**

For a few seconds Dean stared at Sam and Sam stared back, so neither of them saw how Cas was enjoying this. Dean turned around quickly and ran outside. Sam followed him and saw him leaning against the Impala.

"Would you mind explaining what that was?" Sam asked, still a little shocked.

"Actually, I do mind" Dean snapped in response.

"So, what, you have feelings for Cas?" Sam asked confused.

"What? No!" Dean replied defensive. "I don't know"

Meg walked past Cas to the telephone.

"Meg, it's not what you think" Cas tried to talk himself out of it. "It's Dean. He kissed me. It's not like I could stop him or walk away. I'm trapped"

"You're so pathetic" Meg mumbled as she dialed a number.

"Come on, honey, you know I love you. I can't help it Dean has a thing for me" Cas defended himself.

"Why don't you put a sock in it?" Meg replied disgusted.

"Cas kissed me" Dean mumbled embarrassed.

"Okay, that must've been…devastating?" Sam commented.

"No…the devastating thing was that…I kissed him back" Dean confessed. He shook his head. "No…I was just taken by surprise. It's not going to happen again"

A police van stopped at the house and two men in uniform jumped out of the car and ran to the door.

"Police, open up!"

Sam and Dean exchanged looks and then hurried to the cops.

"What's going on?" Sam asked, the moment Meg let the police in. She walked them to the living room.

"There he is" Meg nodded at Cas; the fire was put out. "He's all yours"

* * *

**Part 6**

Sam, Dean and Meg watched the cops take Cas away, who went with them willingly. Too willingly. As soon as the door shut behind them, Dean turned to Meg.

"You called the cops?" he exclaimed. "Have you lost your mind?"

"No" Meg shrugged. "Cas is a serial killer. He needs to be put behind bars. I made the right call, no pun intended"

Dean conjured his phone and dialed a number.

'The number you're trying to reach is currently unavailable'

"Damn it" Dean cursed.

"What?" Sam asked.

"I'm trying to reach that female inspector" Dean explained.

"Who? Inspector Roberts?" Meg guessed. "She's dead. Cas shot her. I was supposed to do it, but I couldn't"

"You couldn't? Because Cas told me you didn't hesitate to kill Heather" Dean snapped.

"That was different. I lost control. Cas was banging that slut" Meg defended herself.

"So you were jealous. Is that why you called the cops? Because that can be the only reasonable explanation as to why you would be so stupid to turn him in" Dean said angry.

"I don't get it. Why is it such a bad thing that he's locked up? He's a killer" Meg said.

Dean turned to Sam for support, but he just pulled his shoulders.

"Prison is crowded with criminals. Thiefs, murderers, rapists" Dean continued passionately.

"Yeah, that's why it's called prison" Meg replied obvious. "Cas will fit right in"

Dean shook his head heavy. "No. He won't last a day" He looked from Sam to Meg and back. "You two can spend your time gloating, but I'll do what has to be done"

He turned around, grabbed the keys on his way to the door and walked out.

* * *

**Part 7**

Cas was sitting in one of the hearing rooms at the police station. There were some pictures laying across the table.

"Do you recognize any of these people, Mr. Novak?" inspector Anderson asked. Cas glanced fleeting at the pictures.

"Nope, never saw any of those poor, poor dead people" he replied careless.

Inspector Anderson shoved a picture towards Cas. "You should take another look" Cas picked up the picture of Heather unwillingly. "According to your medical files you once had a serious overdose of heroin, which turned you extremely violent to yourself. You see those needles? Those are heroin syringes"

Cas moved on his seat.

"I didn't kill her" he said.

Inspector Anderson pushed three other pictures forward and Cas recognized the mutilated bodies of Gary, Marcus and Frederik.

"At least fifteen people saw you provoking these three men on the night they were murdered" he said.

Cas swallowed. "They deserved it" he replied trembling.

"Why? Why did they deserve it?" inspector Anderson asked calm.

"They all deserved to die" Cas mumbled, shutting inspector Anderson out. He stood and started ripping the pictures. The guard at the door hurried to Cas to make him stop, but Anderson stuck out his hand.

"Let him"

Cas threw the particles on the floor and sat down again, breathing heavy.

"Do you feel better now?"

Cas shook his head.

"Are you sure they all deserved to die?" Inspector Anderson asked careful. "Heather almost got you killed, Mrs. Jones gave the judge a false statement, which could've resulted in your conviction. But those people you killed tonight. What have they done wrong?"

"Nothing" Cas mumbled. "That's just it. They didn't do anything. I needed help, but they wouldn't even flinch"

"And those three men? Why did you maim them like that?" inspector Anderson continued. "Why did they deserve to die?"

Cas pulled up his knees and started rocking.

"I had a few people answering some questions and apparently Frederik Gyles has been boasting about how he made sure you'd get punished for what you did to Alexia Moore…They raped you, didn't they?"

"If you're trying to play good cop, where's your bad cop?" Cas avoided the question.

"You killed her" Anderson replied.

"She shot my girlfriend" Cas commented.

"Who's your girlfriend?"

"Meg Masters" Cas answered sad. "I killed Isabel for her and she stabs me in the back"

"Do you know where we can find Miss Masters?"

"She's probably home, where I was arrested. Why?" Cas asked, more curious than concerned.

"Because Meg Masters is our prime suspect in the murder on inspector Paul Morgan" inspector Anderson replied.

"I don't know if that's true, but I know for a fact that she did kill Heather. I saw it with my own eyes" Cas spilled.

* * *

**Part 8**

Meg was pacing up and down the living room. Sam had been trying to reach Dean, but without success. He didn't get it. Half an hour ago Dean had insisted that they would have to turn Cas in. It would break their hearts, but they had no other choice. Sure, they had killed as well, but those were monsters. Cas was simply a murderer.

"I still can't believe Dean kissed Cas" he said, still a little perplex. "I mean, I know they have a…more profound bond, but I never thought of it like that"

Meg stopped pacing and turned to Sam. "Do you mind? I'm trying to erase that image from my memory"

"Dean was supposed to reason with him, not kiss him" Sam continued, ignoring Meg.

"Maybe Dean isn't looking out for Cas. Maybe he's worried about the other prisoners. Who knows if Cas believes they deserve to die as well?" Meg made a very good point.

Sam nodded. "You're right. And we shouldn't let Dean go alone" he realized. "Do you have the keys of that car outside?"

Meg conjured them.

"Good. Let's go" Sam said and he and Meg walked to the front door. The moment they wanted to open it, they heard a siren and a car parked on the driveway. Meg shoved the curtains away and cursed when she saw the van.

"It's the cops. What are they doing here?" she hissed.

"I don't know, but it can't be good" Sam replied baleful.

"Meg Masters, you're being arrested for the murder on Heather Roberts and the murder on Paul Morgan. Come outside and put your hands where I can see them"

* * *

**Part 9**

"Please tell me you didn't kill them" Sam said, knowing better.

"I wish" Meg mumbled in reply. "I was still a demon when I killed Paul and he was working on Cas' case, so I had to do something. And Heather had sex with Cas. Well, actually it's the other way around"

"You killed Heather because Cas was banging her and you turned Cas in because he kissed Dean. I would say you're jealous" Sam noted, with a whiff of guilty pleasure.

Someone banged the door. "Meg Masters, come outside or we will come in"

"You have to go" Sam said quickly and he pulled Meg up. "Okay, punch me"

"What?"

"Punch me, knock me out" Sam repeated sharp. "If I let you escape, the cops have to think I couldn't stop you"

"You're not coming with me?" Meg asked a little surprised.

"No" Sam shook his head. "You have to run and keep a low profile. The police is probably going to take me to the police station, since I'm the last person who saw you"

They heard voices outside the house saying something about going in.

"I'll see if I can find Dean and Cas, but you can't go anywhere near the police station" Sam finished quickly. "Now, hit me"

Meg reluctantly planted her fist in Sam's face and gasped. It was the first time she had punched someone since she was a human. She had slapped Heather, but that was different.

"Get out of here" Sam insisted and Meg ran upstairs. Sam lay on the ground, pretending to be knocked out, when the door slammed open and a few men ran in. Their leader gave them directions and they searched the entire house.

"She's gone, boss" one of them said defeated.

The boss kneeled next to Sam and woke him up.

"Sir, are you alright?"

"What? Aahh" Sam groaned as he touched his cheek.

"You'll have to come with us. We have a few question for you" the boss continued.

* * *

**Part 10**

Dean was wandering through the aisles of the police station. He had no idea where to find Cas, but fortunately a helpful police officer walked his direction.

"What are you doing here? You can't just walk around here" he said a little mad.

"Yeah, I'm looking for Castiel Novak. They said it was okay, but now I'm kind of lost" Dean explained.

The officer sighed. "Actually Castiel Novak isn't allowed to have visitors" he started. "But since he's being transferred tomorrow morning, I suppose it can't hurt"

The officer explained where Cas' cell was. "Usually we bring the prisoner to the visiting room, but in Novak's case, we'd prefer to keep him behind bars as long as possible" He walked Dean around a few corners and then finally stopped at an aisle.

"Go ahead" he nodded. "I'll be staying here. Please, make it quick. I'm breaking a lot of rules here" Dean promised he'd hurry and he ran through the aisle until he found the cell Cas was locked in. Cas was sitting on the ground, leaning against the wall, his legs stretched and his head hanging sideward. He looked really pale and he sweated.

"Cas?" Dean whispered.

Cas didn't react.

"Cas!" Dean called. When Cas maintained his lifeless position Dean turned to the police officer. "I think something's wrong"

The officer walked to the cell and opened it.

"Get up, Novak. You're friend's here" he said and he kicked Cas' leg softly. Cas still didn't show any sign of life and so the officer kneeled. "Novak, stop playing games" he said sharp and threatening.

Cas slowly opened his eyes.

"What happened?" he asked weak.

"That's what I'd like to know" Dean replied obvious.

"Dean" Cas smiled breathless. "You came" He frowned and he touched his belly. When he withdrew his hands they were covered in blood.

"What the hell?" Dean slightly panicked.

The officer lifted up Cas' shirt and revealed an image one doesn't get to see every day. Cas' entire upper body was pierced with razor blades.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18: Separate Ways**

**Part 1**

The next morning.

Cas was sitting up, a bandage wrapped around his chest. The door opened and Dean walked in. The guard wanted to close the door again, when Cas called him.

"Sir, would you mind staying here? I'm worried about my safety" he said. "The intention is to keep me from going anywhere. Best way of doing that is to stay here, so I don't climb a window or something"

The guard went standing next to the door, his arms crossed.

Dean pulled a chair and sat next to the bed. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm still hurting a little" Cas admitted.

"Can you tell me what happened?" Dean asked compassionate. Cas looked down and played with his fingers.

"It was inspector Anderson. When I told him I was responsible for Isabel's death he lost it" Cas explained. "He came to me last night. I don't understand why no one came. I was screaming, someone must've heard it. They probably believed I had it coming"

"I'm going to kill him" Dean swore furious.

"No, Dean" Cas shook his head and he lay his hand on Dean's. "I understand why he did it. I killed his partner, they were close"

"Is it over now?" Dean asked careful. "I mean, are there still people you need to kill?"

"No" Cas answered hoarse. "I'm done…I'd like to come home now. That is if you'll still have me"

"What are you talking about? I will always have you" Dean responded.

"Thank you, Dean" Cas mumbled softly.

* * *

**Part 2**

"We should talk about what happened yesterday" Dean said hoarse.

"I'm not sorry" Cas replied convincing.

"Neither am I" Dean sighed relieved. "But I have to admit that you took me by surprise. I didn't see it coming. Besides, I thought you loved Meg"

Cas looked away and gazed through the window.

"Meg betrayed me. You were right about her. I should've listened to you" he admitted softly. He looked back at Dean. "I think one of the reasons I've been acting so…reckless…is because I didn't know how to act on my feelings for you. Especially because I was convinced you wouldn't feel the same. You always seemed like such a straight guy"

Dean caressed Cas' hand. "You're not the only one who's been betrayed by women" He pulled Cas in for a kiss and the guard looked away. "We should tell them where you are" Dean continued when he let go.

"Do we have to?" Cas asked reluctant. "I mean, can't we wait a little longer? I'd like to spend what's left of my freedom with you"

"Yeah, of course" Dean agreed. "I'll call Sam later"

* * *

**Part 3**

An hour and a half later Dean stood up.

"Where are you going?" Cas slightly panicked.

"Relax, I'm just going to stretch my legs" Dean reassured him. He turned around when Cas gripped his arm.

"Don't leave me here with him" Cas almost ordered Dean. Dean felt Cas fingers dig in his skin and though he would never admit it, it hurt like hell.

"I'll be right outside" Dean promised sharp.

Cas let go of him slowly and Dean walked quickly out of the room. He conjured his phone and dialed Sam's number.

Cas looked at the guard. "I'm ready to go now" he said cold.

"Okay, I will inform my superiors" the guard replied.

"I'd really prefer you wouldn't" Cas commented. "I'd really prefer if you would take me to prison now"

Sam finally picked up his phone.

"Dean, where are you? I've been looking all over for you" he said a little reproaching.

"I'm at the hospital, with Cas. Inspector Anderson violated him with razorblades" Dean explained and as he recalled the scene in the police station he felt his anger returning.

"But he's okay, right? I mean, he's angel, he can heal" Sam commented obvious.

"Oh, really? Is that why he almost died?" Dean snapped sarcastically.

The guard walked towards Cas, his cuffs ready to use. Cas stuck out his hands helpfully and the guard cuffed them. When he was cuffed Cas threw his arms over the guard's head and pressed the cuffs against his throat.

Dean slammed the door open; his anger made him forget his current location. But his anger was soon replaced by devastation. The guard lied dead on the ground , a bloody stripe across his throat.

* * *

**Part 4**

"Dean, wait!" Cas called agitated. "It's not what you think. I can explain it"

Dean widened his eyes. "I'm waiting" he commented trembling.

"He said he was going to take me to prison" Cas started, shaking himself. "But I know he can't do that. He has to follow strict orders from his superiors. So…I knew he was going to take me somewhere else and probably waste me…I had no choice, it was him or me…Dean, you have to believe me"

Dean relaxed. "Of course I believe you" he sighed and walked back to Cas. He took his hands and saw the cuffs had cut Cas' wrists. "I'll get the key"

While Dean searched for the key, the door went open and Meg appeared in the doorway.

"What are you doing here?" Cas snapped hostile.

"Sam told me what happened" Meg explained somewhat apologizing. "I wanted to see how you were doing"

"I'm okay" Cas said sober.

"I can see that" Meg scoffed. "If you're able to kill again"

"He didn't have a choice!" Dean defended Cas while he removed the cuffs. "He threatened his life"

Meg wanted to respond, but Cas stopped her.

"Can we please not fight?" he begged and he looked up at Meg. "I appreciate your concern, but I want you to leave now. It was never my intention to lead you on, but I can no longer deny my feelings for Dean and neither can he. If you ever loved me, you will leave and never come back, so we can be happy together"

Meg fell short of words and air. She blinked and swallowed, determined not to show any emotion. She backed away, then turned around and left the room as fast as possible. Once outside she sunk down on the floor and allowed herself to cry like a baby. So this was what a broken heart felt like.

* * *

**Part 5**

Sam was back home. He had given his statement to the police and they had no reason to question it. Anna was there, too and she wasn't alone. She had brought a woman with her.

"Sam, this is Maryana, she's a witch" Anna introduced the woman. Sam squeezed his eyes in suspicion.

"You brought a witch here?" Sam exclaimed. "You know we can't trust them. They're selfish"

"I'm standing right here, you know" Maryana pointed out.

"I know it's risky" Anna started to explain. "But right now I think it's the only option we have. Cas has gone completely off the rails and someone has to put him back on it"

"Okay" Sam gave in. "What did you have in mind?"

"Well, normally I would put him under hypnosis, but since he's a first class murderer I'd like to stay away from him as far as possible" Maryana said. "So, I'm going to do something much more fun…I'm going to make him switch bodies with whoever's closest to him"

"We have to separate Cas from his angel powers. He's being consumed by them and they make him angry. When he's out of his body we can take away his powers and he'll be human again. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I think he'd be much better off that way" Anna explained.

"The closest person to Cas is Dean" Sam suddenly realized. "He's very much on Cas' side. What if he uses Cas' powers to keep the killing going?"

"Dean doesn't know how to use those powers" Anna said obvious.

"And shouldn't we give them a warning? In case they freak out?" Sam suggested.

"No" Maryana said fast. "If you tell them they'd try to ruin the plan and then Cas will always be the monster he is now"

* * *

**Part 6**

"Put your clothes on" Dean said.

"Why? What are we going to do?" Cas asked suspicious.

"You shouldn't spend your last day of freedom in a hospital room" Dean explained. He conjured his keys and waved them. "Let's go for a ride"

"Now we're talking" Cas smiled and he put on his clothes.

Five minutes later they were outside, with the Impala. Cas walked to the passenger seat.

"Hey, Cas" Dean called and Cas looked up. "Catch" Dean said and he tossed the keys at Cas. Cas caught them with one hand and walked around the car. He got in and so did Dean, but before the latter could put on his seatbelt, the former started the engines and pushed the accelerator pedal down, causing Dean to bump his head against the windshield.

"Aahh!" he exclaimed and he touched his forehead. "Damn it, Cas. You have to be careful"

Cas ignored Dean, but focused on the road.

"How long have you've been having these feelings for me?" he suddenly asked.

"Eh…I don't know" Dean frowned.

"Was it before or after Meg and I slept with each other?" Cas asked helpful.

"Before. Definitely before" Dean replied resolute. "When I heard you and Meg had been together while I was in Purgatory I got really…"

"Jealous?" Cas added.

"Yeah" Dean admitted ashamed.

"Does the fact that I've been sleeping with Meg and live in the same house as her make you somewhat jealous?" Cas kept asking.

"Yeah" Dean answered, surprised by his own honesty. "All those times I insulted her and said you couldn't trust her, I think I was just jealous"

Cas paused for a few minutes, making Dean believe the strange interrogation was over. But then Cas rotated his head to him.

"Is that why you killed my unborn child?" he asked in a normal voice, but with eyes cold as ice.

"What?" Dean stammered.

"You don't have to lie or deny it" Cas said slowly and baleful. He pushed the accelerator pedal even further down as he kept his eyes straight on Dean. "I know what you did"

"Cas, you…you have to keep your eyes on the road" Dean swallowed in fear. "And slow down, please"

"Why? Afraid your baby might get hurt? It's just a car, Dean. You killed a real baby. My baby" Cas continued raging. Before Dean could defend himself Cas grabbed his head and bashed it against the dash-board.

* * *

**Part 7**

Meg was back home and she had told Sam what happened.

"So, it's official, then. They're together" Sam asked for confirmation. Meg shrugged. "I'm going to try and call him again" Sam said resolute.

"You've been trying to call him for the last twenty minutes. What makes you think he'll pick up now?" Meg snapped bitter. "They're probably too busy banging each other"

Sam tried anyway.

Cas tied Dean onto a chair. They were in a motel.

"Your phone keeps ringing" Cas snarled annoyed. He pulled Dean's phone out of Dean's pocket and looked at the screen. "Sam…Just the one I needed" He picked up. "What?" he snapped.

"Cas?" Sam asked surprised. "What are you doing with Dean's phone? Is he around?"

"He's right here" Cas replied. "Shall I pass him onto you?" He looked at Dean as he pushed the speaker button. "Go ahead. Tell them the truth. Tell Sammy what you did"

Dean swallowed. "Sammy?"

"Dean! Where are you? What's going on?" Sam asked urgent.

"Cas knows about the baby" Dean started guilty.

"What baby?" Sam asked confused and Meg groaned. Cas wasn't supposed to find out.

"You remember when Jimmy took over Cas' body? And I wouldn't let Meg see him? We had a fight and she fell off the stairs. Anna told me she'd had a miscarriage"

"Meg was pregnant?" Sam exclaimed as he turned to Meg.

"Yeah, and if Dean hadn't been so selfish to fight with her, she would still have the baby" Cas now yelled.

"Cas, don't do anything stupid. You don't want to hurt Dean. He's your best friend" Sam tried to reason with Cas.

"You sure about that?" Cas asked sinister. He put the phone on Dean's lap and went standing behind him. He placed his hands on his temples. Dean felt his head burning and he screamed.

"Cas! Stop it! Stop hurting him!" Sam begged. "What do you want? I'll do anything"

"Good" Cas said cold. "I want us to meet. You, me and Meg, right here"

* * *

**Part 8**

A taxi stopped in front of the motel and Cas walked toward the window. He moved the curtains and looked outside. Sam and Meg were getting out of the car and walking up the front porch.

"They're here" Cas said a little nervous as he walked back to Dean.

Sam lifted his fist to knock, when Meg stopped him. "The element of surprise, remember?" Sam nodded and kicked the door open. Dean was tied onto a chair and he appeared to be alone. Sam ran to him and started to untie him, when Cas grabbed Meg from behind.

"Keep doing what you're doing and I will break her neck" Cas threatened while he lay a hand on Meg's throat.

Sam hesitated. Last year he wouldn't have blinked, but now he was very reluctant on having her killed.

"Sammy, what are you doing?" Dean asked agitated. "Untie me"

"I can't" Sam stammered. "If I do that, then Meg dies"

"Who cares?!" Dean exclaimed furious. "You really going to choose a demon slut over your own brother? Again?"

"Meg's not a demon" Sam reasoned. "She's human and just because you had to get all lovey dovey with a psychopath doesn't mean she deserves to die"

He stepped away from the chair and Cas pushed Meg down on the floor. He walked to the chair and conjured a bottle of Scotch out of nowhere. He unscrewed the bottle and created a circle around the chair with its liquid. The rest was poured onto the chair itself and on Dean.

"Cas, what the hell are you doing?" Meg asked scared, though she had a pretty good idea. Cas conjured a matchbox and pulled out a match.

"I have to kill everyone that wronged me" he said simple and he struck the match. "Dean has wronged me" He dropped the match and the chair caught fire.

"No!" Sam yelled while Dean screamed. He tried to get to the sink, but Cas blocked his way. He grabbed his shoulders and threw him in the air. Sam felt a bone break, but tried to get up anyway. Dean desperately tried to free himself, but somehow the loosened ropes had tightened themselves again.

Meg looked at Sam, who could barely stand on his feet, to Dean who was being burned alive, to Cas who seemed to enjoy it all a little too much. She realized it was up to her, so she braced herself.

"It was an accident!" she said loud and with trembling voice. "Dean didn't know about the baby. Hell, I didn't even know! Yes, he wouldn't let me see you and yes, we were fighting, but he didn't push me off the stairs. He tried to save me, but he couldn't. And afterwards he apologized for being a jerk and he promised we'd get you back. Dean did not kill our baby"

Cas lost his malicious pleasure attitude. He turned to Dean and crouched. "Is what Meg is saying the truth?"

Dean opened his eyes slowly and challenging and nodded. Cas stood and snapped his fingers, putting the fire out. He healed Dean's wounds and untied him. He walked towards Sam and healed his broken ankle. Then he walked to the front door and opened it.

"Go" he commanded.

Sam hurried to Dean and helped him stand up, while Meg already walked to the door. Once at the door Dean averted his head to Cas as if begging him to let him stay.

"Get out" Cas repeated mad.

The trio left the house and Cas slammed the door. He leaned against the door and sunk down on the floor, breathing heavy.

* * *

**Part 9**

Cas and Meg's mansion.

It was ten o'clock in the evening and Maryana, the witch was back. Anna had informed her that the coast was clear. Sam, Meg and Dean were not going home just yet.

She conjured a white chalk and marked a circle of average size. Then she put candles inside the circle, surrounding it completely. She lit the candles with her mind and then took a bowl and a bag with herbs. She pulled out the herbs one by one and crushed them on the bottom of the bowl, while chanting a Latin incantation.

She put the bowl down and conjured a picture. Cas and Dean were both on it, but there was also a young blonde girl and a woman, possibly her mother, and Sam. Maryana tore the picture apart and blend the particles with the crushed herbs.

She pulled the picture out of the powder. It was complete again, only now Dean was standing where Cas stood and vice versa.

Maryana took the knife she had placed next to the bag of herbs and while she rolled up her sleeve she mumbled: "There's no fun, if there's no blood" And so she cut her arm and blood dripped on the picture. She picked up the picture and held one of its corners against the flame of the closest candle, before she lay the picture down in the middle of the circle.

* * *

**Part 10**

Dean, Sam and Meg were sitting in a diner. Meg was having fries, Sam was having a salad and Dean was having a cheeseburger. Or at least there was a cheeseburger lying before him, begging to be eaten, but Dean merely pricked it with his finger.

"What are you thinking about?" Sam decided to break the ice.

Dean put the burger down, figuring he wouldn't be able to eat anyway.

"Cas" he answered honest.

Sam and Meg exchanged looks.

"Yeah" Sam commented slowly. "I still can't believe he tried to kill you"

"He only threatened to kill me, because you chose a demon whore over your own blood" Dean snapped and he stood. "I have to go back"

"What?" both Sam and Meg exclaimed.

"I have to go back" Dean repeated.

"He tried to kill you!" Sam yelled disbelieving.

"But he didn't" Dean pointed out. "He thought I had killed his child on purpose, but the moment he learned it was an accident, he saved me and that has got to mean something…I'm going back"

Ten minutes later he parked the Impala in front of Cas' motel room. Cas removed the curtains and saw Dean walking up the front porch. Surprised he opened the door, but before he could let out any sound Dean kissed him passionately and forced him back inside. He kicked the door shut with his food, while he kept kissing Cas. His fingers searched for Cas' buttons and opened them. He pulled the shirt over Cas' shoulders and arms and as it fell on the ground Dean took a step back.

It was the first time Dean saw Cas like this and he was going to memorize every part of it.

"Those tattoos" Dean said suspicious. "I've seen them before"

"They're nothing" Cas promised hoarse and he pulled Dean towards him.


	19. Chapter 19

**Chapter 19: The Switch**

**Part 1**

Cas woke up with a fuzzy feeling in his stomach. He sat up and rubbed his eyes and when he looked down he caught a glimpse of his chest in the mirror.

Wait, where did the tattoos go?

He turned around and looked down upon his own, sleeping body. With a shock he jumped out of bed and walked to the mirror in the bathroom. Speechless he gazed at his reflection. Only it wasn't his reflection, it was Dean's. Somehow they had switched bodies and though Cas would love to know how one could accomplish such activity, he decided not to waste any time.

He rushed in his clothes and left the motel room. He had taken Dean's car keys; if Dean was going to go after him, he was going to make it as hard as possible.

However, when Cas wanted to get into the Impala, Dean ran outside. He was wearing pants only and stared upset at his own face.

"What is going on? Why are we in each other's bodies?" he asked stunned.

"I don't know" Cas snapped frustrated. Something told him this thing was only temporarily and he wouldn't waste a second of it.

Dean walked to him. "Where are you going? I'll go with you"

"No" Cas said sharp.

"Why not? I don't want you to go somewhere without me" Dean whined a little obsessive. He stepped closer towards Cas to kiss him, but Cas pushed him away.

"Don't do that" he said in a threatening tone.

"But…" Dean stammered confused. "Last night…"

"Last night was a mistake!" Cas snapped angry and frustrated. "It should've never happened and it's never going to happen again!"

"You don't mean that" Dean commented hurt. "Is someone after you? Are you trying to push me away to protect me? Cas, I can take care of myself. Now stop being such a heartless ass and let me come along"

The easiest solution would be giving Dean what he wanted, but Cas didn't want Dean anywhere near him. Not after last night.

"I have to go alone. You will only distract me. Go back to Sam" Cas ordered Dean.

Dean realized Cas wouldn't listen to any reason. "I want my keys back" he said trembling.

"Fine" Cas replied and he put the keys of the Impala in Dean's shaking hand. "I'll walk" And while Dean stared at him in disbelief and devastation Cas walked away.

* * *

**Part 2**

Inspector Anderson was reading Cas' file when the door opened and a deputy appeared.

"Eh, Luke?" he asked careful. Anderson looked up. "Chief Barnes wants to speak with you"

"I'll be there in a minute" Anderson promised and he looked down again.

"He said it was urgent" the deputy continued.

Anderson closed the file and stood. "Then I'll be there now" he sighed and he followed the deputy outside to Chief Barnes' office. Without knocking Anderson entered. Barnes was reading a paper, which he put down when Anderson walked towards him.

"Have a seat, Luke" Barnes said. Luke. This was not good. Luke sat down. "How are you doing?"

Luke assumed Barnes was talking about Isabel. "I'm coping, sir"

"You and Isabel were pretty close" Barnes said. "How do you feel now you know who killed her?"

"Angry" Luke replied obvious.

Barnes nodded in understanding. "We have charges against you. From Novak himself. He claims you attempted his life by piercing him with dozens of razor blades"

"He what?" Luke exclaimed in disbelief. What a pretentious prick, he thought disgusted. He had always believed Isabel exaggerated when she talked about him. And she had talked about him a lot. "Chief, I guarantee you that I did not lay a finger on the suspect. I bet you anything he did it himself"

"Why would he do that?" Barnes asked skeptic.

"So, we'd have to transfer him to the hospital so he could find a way out. He's good at that" Luke explained obvious.

Barnes nodded. "I'll have the security footage checked" he said. "In the meantime I want you to get in contact with the guard in the hospital"

Luke said he'd do it right away and left the office.

* * *

**Part 3**

Dean quickly showered. Though he wanted to go and find Cas as soon as possible, he was also determined to take care of Cas' body, while he was in it. Looking in the mirror he checked the tattoos again. He would have to ask Sam whether he recognized it and if he didn't, they could still look it up.

Dean hurried in his clothes and then took his phone and dialed Sam's number.

"Dean?" Sam asked urgent.

"Yeah" Dean said with Cas' voice. "Okay, don't freak out, but something happened. Cas and I are in each other's bodies and this time it's not physical"

Sam didn't respond right away as he needed some time to absorb that information.

"Are you saying…Do you mean…" he stammered in amazement. Then he pulled himself together. "Did you sleep with Cas? As in…have sex?"

"Yeah" Dean replied obvious. "I love him, he loves me, why wait?"

"Uhu" Sam mumbled dazed. "Don't forget to invite me for the wedding" he added sarcastically.

"I really wish you would take me serious" Dean said hurt. "Anyways, why I'm calling, is Cas with you?"

Now Sam's shock made room for confusion. "No, I thought he was with you"

"He ran off" Dean explained disappointed. "He seemed a little agitated, like he wanted to get away from me as far as possible"

"Dean, you have to find him" Sam commented sharp.

"I know! I have to find him and convince him that what we have is beautiful and nothing to be ashamed-"

"No, Dean" Sam cut off his brother's romantic declaration. "You have to find him so Anna can make him human again"

"What are you talking about? Why would she want to make him human again?" Dean asked.

"Because she says his powers are consuming him and the only way to stop the killing is to take away his powers. That means you and Cas have to come back home so Anna can do what needs to be done" Sam explained.

"Alright, Sammy" Dean mumbled distracted. "I'll find Cas. I promise"

He hung up. He was going to find Cas, but he wasn't going to take him back home. No one was going to touch his angel.

* * *

**Part 4**

The hospital

The cleaning lady was mopping the hallway when she heard something buzz. She followed the sound and knocked on a door. When no one answered she opened the door and found the guard dead. She screamed and dropped her mop.

Luke opened the door to the office of the security footage. Chief Barnes and Victor, the guy that was responsible for the security footage were sitting at a desk, looking at a computer.

"Bad news, chief. Our guard has been found dead, murdered" Luke said. Barnes looked at him for a few seconds, making Luke feel somewhat uncomfortable. "Eh…aren't we supposed to gather the team?"

"In a minute" Barnes said serious. "Come here. You need to see this"

Luke walked to the desk and looked at the screen. Victor pressed replay and then played the recording again.

Cas was sitting in the corner of his cell. He opened his hand and dropped a pile of razor blades.

"Where did he get those?" Luke mumbled surprised. Barnes didn't answer and so he focused on the screen again.

Cas unbuttoned his shirt and took one of the razor blades. He pierced it deeply in his chest. He repeated the process with all the razor blades until his upper body was completely pierced.

"He doesn't even flinch" Luke whispered loud, both horrified and impressed.

Barnes turned to Victor. "I want a list of everyone who visited Novak since he got arrested"

"That's a short list. The only visitor is Dean Winchester and he found Novak" Viktor replied. "They checked his pockets. He only had a knife and they took it from him"

"Yes, but they seemed pretty close, and Winchester was with Novak while they brought him to the hospital" Luke reminded them. "Winchester may very well be the last person who saw Novak before he escaped, if he's not with him"

Barnes nodded in agreement. "Bring him in" he ordered. He turned to Luke. "Luke, if I ever doubt you again…" he didn't finish his sentence. "We're getting Novak" he said fierce. "For Isabel"

* * *

**Part 5**

Meg walked through an alley when her phone buzzed. She pulled it out of her pocket and looked at the screen.

"What?" she said hostile.

"Meg?"

She recognized Dean's voice, but there was something about the way he said her name. There was only one person who said her name like that.

"What do you want?" she asked, determined not to let het guard down.

"Can we meet?" Cas asked. "At Butterfield Park?"

"Sure" Meg gave in. "See you there in ten minutes"

Ten minutes later Meg stood by the swimming pool in Butterfield Park when Cas walked her way. Before she knew what happened he cupped her face and kissed her passionately. Instinctively Meg raised her hand and slapped him in the face. Cas lost his balance and fell backwards into the swimming pool. He came to the surface and spit out a gulp of water. "I suppose I deserved that"

"What the hell are you doing?" Meg exclaimed.

"Right" Cas said slowly. "I look like Dean…We switched bodies"

"You what?" Meg asked stunned.

"Dean and I switched bodies. I don't know how it happened, but it did" Cas explained. "Can you give me a hand?"

Meg kneeled and reached out her hand. Cas took it and pulled her into the water.

Dean was standing a few yards further. He knew Cas well enough to know who he would turn to in a crisis. And Cas' powers which he now possessed, had helped him find him.

"We always seem to end up here" Cas said hoarse.

"And always in the most awkward circumstances" Meg added.

Dean felt his heart break as Cas and Meg kissed a second time.

* * *

**Part 6**

"Okay, you know what? You can't do that" Meg said as she pulled herself away. She swum to the shore and climbed out of the pool. "You can't just throw the most horrible insults at me, make out with the guy you're wearing right now while I'm watching, betray me with the cops and then come back thinking I'll forgive you"

Cas pulled himself out of the water.

"I understand your confusion and your anger" he started while Meg wrung her hair. "But I will explain it all to you"

"Okay, spill" Meg replied expectantly.

"Not here. This is too…public. Let's go to the cafeteria" Cas suggested. He walked to the cafeteria and held the door open for Meg. They walked to an empty table at the window and took their seats.

"Well, I'm all ears" Meg said.

"When Jimmy took over I tried to fight back" Cas began. "And he became sick and I felt it wouldn't be long until I'd be in charge again" His phone buzzed and he frowned annoyed. He looked at the screen and picked up. "What's wrong, Dean?"

Dean, who had followed them to the cafeteria, was calling him from inside his car.

"We need to talk about last night" he said serious.

"Do we have to do that now?" Cas replied both annoyed and panicking. He didn't know how much time he had and if Dean was going to stall him.

"Yes, now" Dean responded heartless. "The past two days were amazing. I've never been happier than when we were together. And now you're acting like nothing happened, like I don't mean anything to you. I know you're back with Meg, the demon whore"

"Meg's not a demon and she's definitely not a whore" Cas managed to defend Meg throughout Dean's rant.

"What is wrong with you?" Dean exclaimed desperate. "Are you under her spell or something?...Wait, that's it! She…she cursed you. She hired a witch to put a love spell on you…Don't worry, Cas, I will break that spell, even if I have to break every bone in Meg's body"

"You are not touching her" Cas replied threatening.

"You have to go" Dean ignored Cas' last comment. "The cops are there"

Cas quickly pulled the curtains and realized to his horror that Dean was right.

"We have to go" he said agitated. Before Meg could ask any questions Cas grabbed her hand and led her to the backdoor.

Unfortunately the police was there waiting for them. Originally they were just there to take 'Dean' for a few questions about 'Cas' ' whereabouts. But now that their prime suspect on the murder on one of their inspectors was standing before them, they changed plans.

"Meg Masters, you are under arrest for plural murder"

Meg's hands were being cuffed and a cop pushed her inside the police van.

"You have to come with us, Mr. Winchester" Luke said cold. "We have a few questions for you"

* * *

**Part 7**

Dean walked inside a diner. He was hungry, so he'd have some hamburgers and a beer. He walked to a table and signaled at the waitress. She froze when she saw him, but walked to him anyway.

"What can I get you?" she asked, trying to keep a straight face.

Dean gave his order and she walked away again. She leaned towards her boss. "That's Castiel Novak" she mumbled.

"I know" her boss commented softly and he took his phone. His eyes on Dean he dialed 911.

Ten minutes later the waitress brought Dean his meal.

"Thank you, sweetheart" Dean said flirty. "Why don't you sit down?"

"Thank you, but I can't" the waitress refused.

"Why not? It's quiet" Dean looked around.

The waitress looked helplessly at her boss, who nodded encouragingly. She sank down opposite Dean and watched him eating with those hands that had killed dozens of people.

"Hey…" he stared at her name card. "Grace" he read. Then he looked up and smiled. "You wouldn't happen to have any pie around, would you?"

"Sure, I'll go check" Grace said with a slightly trembling voice. She stood up and staggered to the bar. "He wants pie" she mumbled terrified as if Dean had required her soul. "How long until they're here? I can't do this much longer"

Her boss put a plate with a piece of cake in her hands. "Just a few more minutes"

Grace frowned angry and scared as she walked back to Dean's table.

"Thank you, sweetie" Dean smiled as she put the plate down. He waved at the seat opposite him, telling her to sit down again. "Wow, this…this is the best pie I've ever eaten"

"I'll make sure our chef's hears about it" Grace promised weak. She heard a car stop and peeked through the window. She tried not to show any sign of relief as she saw the police van parked on the driveway.

The door opened and two police officers walked in. They first looked at the bar who nodded in Dean's direction. The officers headed there and stopped at Dean's table.

"Castiel Novak?"

Dean looked up, confused. "What? No, I'm not Cas-Oh, crap, I totally forgot about that" he mumbled in himself.

Grace looked up at him, completely dismayed. How did one forget about the dozens of murders they've committed?

"I suppose I have to come with you, right?" Dean guessed. "Oh, well" he added as he stood. At first it appeared he was going to surrender willingly, but then he threw a punch at one of the officers. He pushed him against the other officer making them both lose their balance and he ran to the exit.

Once outside two more officers aimed their gun at him.

"Mr. Novak, we're allowed to shoot you, if you try to escape" one of them said loud and clear. "Think very hard about your next move"

* * *

**Part 8**

Maryana was sitting before her circle in Indian style, keeping the spell intact, when Anna appeared behind her. Maryana didn't hear her; she was too concentrated.

Anna walked towards her and tapped her shoulder. Maryana's eyes flashed open and she rotated her head to Anna.

"Your spell worked" Anna said.

Maryana gazed at the angel, making her feel uneasy. "Of course it worked" she replied after a few uncomfortable minutes. "It is my spell"

"Yes, and now I need you to reverse it" Anna continued.

"Have you found your brother? And his friend?" Maryana asked.

"No" Anna sighed. "Well, I found Dean-I mean, Cas. He's at the police station answering questions about Dean-I mean Cas-You know what I mean" she said frustrated. "I know where Cas is, but I can't find Dean. And Sam tried to reach him, but he won't answer his phone"

"Then you haven't taken Castiel's powers away yet" Maryana concluded. "Then what was the use of this spell?"

"Turns out there was none" Anna replied frustrated still. "I had hoped that if Cas was separated from his powers he'd come back to his senses, but he'll have to go back to his own body sooner or later and then his powers will get the best of him again"

"Then what are you suggesting? You're just going to leave it at that?" Maryana asked slowly.

"No, after the spell's reversed I will find Dean. He'll be able to tell me where Cas is…and then I will end it myself" Anna finished with uncontrolled voice.

A few seconds of deafening silence followed as Maryana understood what Anna was saying.

"You're going to kill him" she said sober. There was no judgment and no shock in her voice. Anna pressed her lips and blinked. She inhaled deeply through her knees.

"I have my angel sword…I'll do it quick" she said with an unsteady voice. She looked up at Maryana. "Can you do it now? Before I change my mind?"

Maryana turned around again and focused on the spell again.

* * *

**Part 9**

"So, you have absolutely no idea where Castiel Novak is?" Luke asked.

Cas looked around. He'd been here before, when Isabel and inspector Morgan had interrogated him about Shannen White's murder.

"Earth to Dean" Luke snapped his fingers. Cas looked at the fingers.

"Where is Meg?" he asked softly. It was the only thing he cared about.

"Miss Masters is in for custody" Luke replied. "There's a fair chance she won't come out until court. If there's going to be one. Same goes for your friend, as soon as they find him" Luke hadn't been informed yet, but that was only a matter of minutes.

The door opened and chief Barnes appeared in the doorway. A visit from the boss. This was unusual. Barnes signaled and Luke walked towards him.

"We got him" he said as he gripped Luke's shoulder. "We got that monster" Barnes made an uncharacteristic move and pulled Luke closer. When he let go Luke pointed behind him.

"What about him?" he referred to 'Dean'. "He claims he was with his brother during all killings"

"Check his alibi. If he's speaking the truth there's no reason to keep him here" Barnes replied. He turned around to leave when they heard a thump. They turned around again and saw Cas lying on the floor. His chair had capsized somehow.

"Dean?" Luke called, walking to Cas' still body. For a moment Cas seemed to be death. Then his eyes opened wide and he gasped for breath. "Are you alright?"

Dean blinked his eyes a few times. He looked at his hands. They were his own. He was back in his body, which meant Cas was now locked behind bars. It took Dean a moment to comprehend what had happened the past few days, but it was too confusing.

In another department of the police station Meg was sitting in a cell. She heard footsteps and she assumed it was a cop. Her surprise was enormous when she saw Cas walking around the corner. He hurried towards her and put a key in the lock. He swung the cell door open and pulled Meg up. He pulled her towards him and kissed her. When he let go Meg slapped him the second time that day.

"That I didn't deserve" Cas said while he rubbed his cheek.

"Cas?" Meg asked unsure.

Cas' eyes bulged and Meg covered her mouth. "I thought you were Dean" she squeaked. "I'm sorry" she apologized.

"It's fine" Cas said. "But we have to go now" He dragged her along, but after a few minutes Meg braced. "What?" Cas asked nervous.

"How are you feeling? Do you still want to kill people?" Meg asked, jerking her hand and backing away.

Cas nodded, but not in a confirmation. "I still have my powers" he confessed. "But I don't want to kill anyone. What I did is…unforgivable and my only excuse is that…I got so used to being human that when I regained my powers I couldn't control them.

And I didn't want to. I wanted to take revenge on those people and my powers helped me accomplish that. But I loathe myself for the pain I put you through. I will return to the angels and I will accept their punishment. But first I need to get you and Dean out of here"

Meg wasn't sure she believed him, but since she was short of options she decided to take the chance. Cas took Meg's hand and they took flight. They appeared next to Dean who jumped up. Barnes and Luke were lying on the floor.

"They collapsed" Dean explained. "All of a sudden" He looked up at Cas as if the answer was written on his face.

"I had to do something" Cas simply answered. Meg frowned, assuming the worst. "No, they're not dead" Cas quickly added. "They're just sleeping. You can check if you want to"

Meg crouched and checked Luke's wrist. "He's alive" she sighed relieved. She stood. "I'm sorry' she mumbled.

"No, you have every right to doubt me. You should doubt me" Cas replied sharp. "Now, let's go, before they wake up"

He flew them a few miles from the police station when they heard an explosion.

"What was that?" Cas yelled panicking.

"Explosion" Dean responded.

"The police station" Meg added breathless.

"I have to go back" Cas mumbled in shock and he already started walking back.

"No!" Meg called and she ran to him, blocking his way.

"Meg, those people are dead, because of me. I made them fall asleep. They had no time to run" Cas cried passionately.

"They wouldn't have had time anyway" Meg pointed out. "We just got lucky"

"I promised I wouldn't get anyone else killed" Cas exclaimed defeated.

Dean grabbed Cas' shoulders and shook him. "Here's the thing, buddy, you did not kill them. Maybe there was a gas leak, I don't know, but it wasn't your fault. Meg and I owe our lives to you. If you hadn't busted us out of jail, we'd be dead, too. You didn't kill anyone, but you saved two people"

Cas swallowed and then nodded. "Okay" he said hoarse.

* * *

**Part 10**

Dean opened the door and stopped Cas from going in. Just because Cas was willing to surrender to the angels didn't mean Dean was. And neither was Meg. There was no one at first sight, but then Sam appeared out of the kitchen. And so did Crowley.

"Hello, boys…and whore" Crowley said. He walked towards the trio. "I've been looking for you. I'm not sure who I'd like to kill first…the idiot who's been a pain in my ass from the moment we met…the demon scum who was so stupid to choose the wrong side…or the angel who double crossed me…Eeny…meeny…miny…moe"

His finger pointed at Meg. "Looks like we've got a winner" He disappeared and popped back behind Meg. He was going to take her back to hell, when Cas grabbed his wrist and forced the King of Hell to look in his eyes. For the first time since long Dean and Sam saw something uncommon in Crowley's eyes. Fear. He let go of Meg and backed away. He looked at Dean.

"You have no idea what you're dealing with"

A big smile appeared on Cas' face. "And the award for the most observant player goes to…" He snapped his fingers and Crowley turned into a pile of dust. "…the death demon"

Cas collapsed and fell on his knees. He gagged and barfed out all of the food Dean had put in his stomach. Then he fell down.

"Oh my God" Meg said breathless. "We've been such idiots"

"Amelia said Jimmy disappeared after you threatened her. She said he was sick" Sam thought out loud. "Because Cas was fighting back. If you were stuck in your body for years while someone else was pulling the strings, and you finally regained control, but you threaten to lose it again, what would you do?"

"I'd get help" Meg commented slowly. "Cas told me not to tell you guys about those men he killed. He said you wouldn't understand. Said he didn't want to, but that he had no choice. He said he had this rage inside of him since Jimmy died" Meg recalled some uncommon moments with Cas.

"_Cas, stop. What are you doing?" Meg panicked as Cas slid deeper and moved his hips forward. She struggled underneath him, but Cas only tightened his grip_.

"He told Dean he had his powers back when he killed those customers, but he already had his powers back before then"

"_This whole 'they're going to pay for what they did to me' is not you! You're not the vengeful type" _

"When's the last time Cas ate or slept?" Sam pointed out.

"_Are you tired?" he asked concerned._

"I don't think he's done either since he returned" Dean said dark, glancing at Cas' unconscious body.

_He let go of her and raised his hand. He hit her so hard she fell down against the dresser._

"Cas hit me" Meg whispered and she touched her cheek as if it had only happened a couple of seconds ago. "Cas would never hit me"

"He destroyed the tablets" Sam continued. "Why would an angel want to destroy something we can use against demons?"

"Anna couldn't track him down" Dean said, and he started pacing around. "If he was an angel, she should be able to find him"

"But she carved me and Cas, so we'd be invisible for all angels" Meg added. "So, if Cas is still human, the carves should still be intact and it would make sense she can't track him down"

"The moment he realized you had set him up, he reached out to Dean" Sam went on, turning to Dean. "I mean, think about it. First we all agreed on trapping Cas, the next moment you're all lovey dovey with him. You even had sex with him"

"Please, don't remind me of it" Dean mumbled horrified.

"I think Cas used a love spell on you, so you'd be on his side. He turned Meg in, so she'd be in prison and we all three would be separated" Sam said.

"He threatened to kill me last night" Meg replied breathless. "And he set Dean on fire"

"Cas and I switched bodies" Dean realized. "But if Cas is an angel, he'd had to ask my permission to possess my body. I didn't give it to him, and yet he managed to do so. His powers should've made that impossible, unless they weren't his powers"

All three turned to Cas, as realization punched them in the face, while Cas slowly started moving again in a spasmodic way.

"Two's a party…" Dean said.

"…three's a crowd" Sam added.

"He's being possessed" Meg finished.


	20. Chapter 20

**Remember how I said to pay attention while reading chapter 12, because it would come back in a different angle? This is the different angle.**

**Chapter 20: Three's a Crowd (flashback chapter) **

**Part 1**

Jimmy closed the door of the hospital behind him. He was lucky it was dark. His hospital apron would've been very noticeable in broad daylight. Nevertheless he needed clothes. He couldn't travel in hospital clothes. People might think he's some nutcase who escaped. He started window shopping, staying in the shadows.

After a while he came across a clothing shop. He looked around to make sure no one was looking his direction. Then he grabbed a flowerpot from the window-ledge and threw it through the window.

The glass shattered and Jimmy jumped inside, while the alarm was howling. He quickly checked the store to find the men's clothes and as soon as he'd viewed them he ran to the section and searched for his size. When he'd found pants and a shirt he wanted to leave, but then he heard sirens; the cops had arrived.

Jimmy hurried to the customer's restrooms, hoping they wouldn't check there. He put the clothes on and then stared at the door, waiting agitated.

"All clear!" he heard a male cop shout.

"Have you checked the bathroom?" another male cop responded.

Damn it, Jimmy cursed. He couldn't close the door, because then the cops would know someone was in here.

Suddenly Jimmy found himself walking to the sink. He grasped the sink and bashed his head against the mirror.

"Hurts, doesn't it?" came out of Jimmy's mouth, but it wasn't Jimmy who was talking. It was Cas, fighting back already.

Jimmy fainted when the door opened and Luke walked in.

"Sir?" he called, carefully tapping Jimmy's shoulder. "Sir, wake up"

Jimmy opened his eyes and looked feral around him.

"Is he gone? He attacked me" he mumbled breathless.

"Who attacked you?" Luke asked with accent.

Cas, the guy who's trapped inside my body. No, he couldn't say that.

"I saw the glass was broken and I wanted to catch the culprit. I know it was stupid" Jimmy said, acting ashamed of himself.

"Did you see him?" Luke kept asking.

"No, he was wearing a mask" Jimmy shook his head.

Disappointment overwhelmed the inspector. "Alright" he eventually sighed. "You need to clean that up" he pointed at the blood on Jimmy's face.

"Sure" Jimmy mumbled and he took some toilet paper. He folded it and pressed it against the cuts.

"You should go outside, my partner can take you to a hospital" Luke said.

Jimmy nodded obedient and left the restroom. He walked to the window and climbed outside. Inspector Williamson walked towards him.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he asked rude thinking he was Cas.

"It's okay, Carl" Luke said, walking out of the door. "He needs medical care"

"No" Jimmy refused quickly. "No hospital. I'm not insured. Besides it's just a cut, it's no big deal. I just want to go home"

The latter was true.

"Can you give us your number, so we know how to reach you? You're a witness, after all" Luke requested.

Jimmy quickly scribbled a number down, the wrong number, and gave it to Luke. Luke put it in his pocket and when he looked up he saw Jimmy staring at him.

"You need a ride?" Luke asked.

"Actually, I was hoping I could use your phone" Jimmy answered careful.

Luke conjured his phone and handed it to Jimmy. Jimmy dialed his home number and waited with pounding heart for his wife to pick up the phone.

"Hello?" Amelia said when she picked up the phone.

Jimmy tried to say something, but his voice seemed to be stuck in his throat. He swallowed.

"Amelia?" he said hoarse and weak.

Silence followed. This wasn't her husband. It was probably that angel, playing a sick joke with them.

"Amelia, it's me, Jimmy" Jimmy appealed. "I fought the angel and now I'm back"

Amelia remained speechless.

"I want to come home" Jimmy said.

* * *

**Part 2**

The midday sun was shining high at the sky when Amelia drove into her street. Jimmy hadn't said a word during the entire ride of fourteen hours. She parked the car on the driveway, swallowed and then turned to her long lost husband.

"Claire doesn't know" she said with heavy and tired voice. "It all happened so fast and she was chatting with friends. I didn't want to upset her"

"You don't have to apologize" Jimmy commented softly. "I know it must have been a shock to you when I called you last night, but I thought it would be better than to show up on our doorstep"

Amelia nodded. "You got that right…Stay here, I'll go prepare our daughter" She stepped out of the car and walked to the front porch. She wanted to insert her key into the lock, when the door swung open and Claire appeared in the doorway.

From where Jimmy was sitting he could see Claire waving with her arms, an angry frown on her face.

She had changed so much. His little Claire has changed into a beautiful young woman. Would she have a boyfriend? Of course she had a boyfriend. She was probably the most popular girl in high school, but kindhearted and honest.

He saw her looking his way and her anger faded and confusion came instead. She marched to him and he stepped out of the car. When she reached him she threw her arms around his neck.

"I missed you too, honey" Jimmy sobbed. Claire let go of him and linked her arm with his. They walked to the house and entered.

"You must be tired" Amelia said, while letting out a giant yawn.

"Look who's talking" Claire fired back. "I think you both need to go upstairs and sleep a few hours. I'll take care of myself"

"Don't tell us what to do, you rat!" Jimmy hissed at his daughter, who gasped shocked. An instant later Jimmy gasped as well. "I'm so sorry. Claire, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to" He turned to Amelia for support. "It's Castiel"

"The angel? I thought he was dead" Amelia exclaimed.

"No, he's still in me and he's attacking me from the inside" Jimmy appealed. "Please, you have to believe me"

For a short while Amelia didn't react, but then she nodded.

"You can't be serious. Do you believe him?" Claire exclaimed out of her mind.

"Shut up, you godless creature!" Jimmy yelled. He grabbed Claire's hair and dragged her up the stairs, all the way to her room, while she was crying from the pain. He pushed her inside her room and locked the door.

"Jimmy, what on earth do you think you're doing?" Amelia asked scared and mad at the same time. Jimmy frowned, then shook his head. "I'm tired. I'm going to have some rest. You should do the same" He walked past her as if nothing strange had happened.

* * *

**Part 3**

Amelia made sure Jimmy was fast asleep, before she snuck out of the room and tiptoed to her daughter's bedroom. She turned the key and opened the door. Claire was sitting on her bed, her arms wrapped around her legs.

Amelia walked into the room.

"Are you okay?" she asked concerned.

Claire shook her head heavy. "No. Dad's totally nuts. He's been gone for years and now he thinks he can throw around insults like he owns the place"

Amelia sank down on the bed. "Your father has been through a lot. Castiel made him suffer and he couldn't be with us, his family. I think it would be a good idea if he went to see someone. Like a therapist, someone who can help him deal with the past"

"I'm not crazy"

Amelia and Claire turned to the doorway, where Jimmy was standing.

"I know, darling" Amelia replied careful and she walked towards. "But it would be good for all of us. I'll go with you"

Jimmy shrugged and turned around. He walked to the stairs and went downstairs. Amelia and Claire followed him. When they were downstairs the bell rang. Claire walked up to the door, but when she wanted to open it, Jimmy stopped her.

"Wait" he called. He walked to the window and moved the curtains. He recognized the two men, but the woman was unfamiliar to him. "Sam and Dean. They're friends of the angel" Jimmy mumbled agitated. He looked at Claire. "Get out. Go upstairs, go outside, I don't care, but get out"

Claire walked away, but instead of leaving, she went to the living room and conjured her iPod. She put the earphones in her ears, but didn't turn on the music. She wouldn't miss a word.

The bell rang again and Claire saw a woman peeking inside.

"Wait here" Jimmy continued to Amelia. He ran to the kitchen and opened a drawer. He pulled out a knife and ran back to Amelia. Amelia's eyes bulged and she backed away. "Open the door. Don't tell them where I am and don't say you've seen me"

He pressed himself against the wall behind the door and held the knife against Amelia's side.

Amelia opened the door and faced the Winchesters. Claire moved on the couch, ready to absorb every single word.

"Hi, you probably don't remember us" Dean spoke. "I'm Dean, this is Sam and that's Meg" he said with a nod at the blonde woman.

"No, I know you" Amelia commented nervous. "Why are you here?"

"Eh, well, it's kind of complicated" Sam now said. "We're looking for Jimmy. We have reason to believe he's here"

Amelia cast a quick glance at Jimmy, who remained invisible for the Winchesters. He nodded encouragingly and Amelia turned back to Sam and Dean.

"Last time I saw Jimmy was when that angel possessed him"

"Yeah, see, that's where it gets complicated" Sam continued. "Cas is not an angel anymore. He's human now and apparently Jimmy has been fighting Cas to regain control over his body, which he did, but now Cas is stuck in there"

Oh dear, Jimmy had told her the truth. The angel was still inside him. She remained quiet for too long; she felt the knife stung in her side.

"You mean like Jimmy has been stuck for years?" she quickly recovered. "I don't really see the problem. It's Jimmy's body"

She started to close the door, but the blonde chick put her foot against it.

"Here's what we're going to do, Barbie. You're going to tell us where we can find the jerk that's keeping Cas hostage and then maybe we won't tear you to shreds. How's that for a deal?"

The blonde chick was obviously the girlfriend, Amelia realized, as Dean pulled her away.

"My apologies" he mumbled. "She's a little on edge"

She's not the only one, Amelia thought bitter.

"I don't know where Jimmy is. And I wouldn't let any of you go near him" Amelia said trembling. She felt the point of the knife piercing in her flesh and failed to keep a straight face. "Please, just go. I can't help you"

She closed the door and turned terrified to Jimmy.

"You did absolutely perfect" he smiled and he withdrew the knife.

* * *

**Part 4**

Amelia lifted up her shirt and checked the blood on her side.

"Did I do that?" Jimmy frowned horrified. "I didn't mean to hurt you. It's Castiel. He's making me do these things"

Amelia nodded tired. "Yeah, I know" she replied short. "I'll put a bandage on it"

"I'll help you" Jimmy quickly said and he supported his wife on her way to the bathroom.

Claire jumped out of the couch and hurried to the cupboard where she grabbed her mom's car keys. If Castiel really was still in her father's body, they were going to need help to get him out. She walked to the front door and ran to her mom's car. She was lucky.

Dean's Impala was still parked. They were probably wondering what to do.

Amelia took off her shirt and looked at the wound again.

"It's just a scratch" Jimmy said apologizing and he cleaned the blood. Amelia cringed from pain and he was overwhelmed with guilt. "I'm really sorry"

"You need to do something about Castiel. You can't let him control you, control us" Amelia replied.

"You're right" Jimmy admitted. "It's not fair to you or Claire" He wrapped the bandage around her side and then reached her a clean shirt.

"We should all sit around the table and think about an acceptable solution" Amelia continued, more to herself than to Jimmy.

Once downstairs Amelia headed to the living room to collect Claire. But the living room was empty. "Claire?" she called, but there was no response. "Claire!" she yelled and she ran back upstairs, to check the rooms.

"What's going on? Where's Claire?" Jimmy wanted to know when Amelia ran off the stairs again.

"I don't know. I can't find her" she replied agitated. "Claire!"

"Sweetie, do you still keep your keys on the closet?" Jimmy asked softly, while looking at the closet. Amelia nodded. "Yeah, why?"

"Because they're gone" Jimmy continued.

* * *

**Part 5**

"I'm calling the police" Amelia said agitated while she walked to the phone. She dialed 911, but Jimmy took the phone out of her hand.

"And what do you think they'll tell you? They're not going to look for her unless she's gone for 24 hours" he reasoned. "She's a teenager. She's being dramatic. She'll come back. Give it an hour or two, but you can't start panicking, because that's exactly what she wants"

"I'll give her an hour" Amelia gave in. "If she's not back by then, I'll go look for her myself"

"Alright, I'll look with you" Jimmy commented. He frowned and grabbed his stomach.

"Jimmy?" Amelia asked concerned. "Are you okay?" Jimmy shook his head. "Is it the angel?" Jimmy nodded and gasped. "Do you want me to call a doctor?"

"No, they won't find anything" Jimmy groaned. "I'll just go to bed, try to sleep it off"

"You want some painkillers?" Amelia suggested.

"No" Jimmy moaned. "That's exactly what he's counting on" He gasped again and fell on his knees.

"Jimmy!" Amelia screamed. She wanted to help him stand up, but he raised his hand to stop her.

"Stay away from me" he mumbled breathless. Amelia frowned hurt and offended. "It's for your own safety. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want Castiel to hurt you"

Amelia understood and stepped away. Powerless she watched her husband crawl upstairs like a hurt animal.

* * *

**Part 6**

Amelia walked to the living room where the phone was. She picked it up and called her daughter's cell. When Claire didn't pick up, she left a message.

"Claire, when you get this, please call me back. I'm not angry with you for taking the car without asking. I'm just really worried"

She tried to think of something else to say, but couldn't come up with anything and so she hung up. She walked to the kitchen. Jimmy had requested some tea and she was going to make some.

When it was ready she poured the tea in a cup and carried it upstairs. She opened the door and walked inside their bedroom.

"Here's your tea" she smiled weak as she walked to the bed. "I'll just put it here. It's still very hot"

"I'll take my chance" Jimmy commented and he took the cup in his hand.

"Careful" Amelia said concerned.

Jimmy blew in his tea and then took a sip. He frowned and looked up.

"Something wrong, sweetie?" Amelia asked with a small voice.

"Didn't I specifically ask for oolong tea?" Jimmy asked. Amelia nodded. "Then why do you bring me green tea?" he yelled as he threw the cup of tea at his wife. Amelia jumped aside and the cup scarcely missed her.

"I'm sorry" she moaned, at the brink of tears. "We don't have any oolong tea. I didn't think you'd be able to tell the difference"

As she saw Jimmy step out of bed she backed away.

"Why?" Jimmy snapped and he grabbed her by her hair. "Because I'm stupid? You're the one who's stupid" He pushed her on the floor. "You clean that up"

Amelia, shaking over her entire body, started collecting the fragments, trying not to burst into tears, for she knew that would only make him angrier.

"Maybe I can go to the store, see if they have oolong tea" she suggested, in an attempt to make up for her mistake.

Jimmy, who had returned to bed, looked up. "What?" he asked confused. "No, don't bother, dear. I'm good"

Amelia stood and walked to the door. "I'll see if I can reach Claire" she mumbled and she staggered outside.

* * *

**Part 7**

Jimmy opened the door of the bedroom. He heard a voice that didn't belong to Amelia. He snuck down the stairs until he had a clear view on the women, without being exposed. His wife was standing with her back towards him, which was good, because now he could see who the visitor was.

He didn't recognize her at first; she had dyed her hair. But when he heard her speak, he knew who she was.

"Let's trade. Oh, and no police, or Claire will be demon meat. I used to be a demon, I still have connections. So better show up at this address with your hubby or even better, send him alone. You have until midnight"

Jimmy quickly turned around and ran back upstairs. He walked to the bathroom and opened the tap. He splashed some water in his face and then opened the cupboard. He took out all the medication and flushed the pills through the wash table one by one.

He looked up and gazed at his reflection.

"You're not separating me from my family again, Castiel. I won't let you" he said determined.

But how he was going to accomplish that remained a mystery. He couldn't exorcise him. Not only did Jimmy not have any experience in the matter, Castiel was not a demon.

"Get out of me!" Jimmy yelled in despair, but of course Cas stayed put. He couldn't stay here. He had to get out of the house, before he hurt Amelia. He didn't remember the incident earlier in their bedroom. He left the bathroom and ran downstairs.

Amelia headed to him, when he grabbed his coat and put it on. "Where are you going?" she asked surprised.

"Out" Jimmy answered short. "I can't stay here. I will hurt you and I don't want that. Castiel is trying to kill me from the inside and he's trying to take you and Claire down with me. I won't let that happen. I won't let some stupid angel ruin everything for us. So, I'm going to get help. I don't know when I'll be back, but when I do, I promise we'll be a family again"

He gave her a kiss goodbye and then left.

* * *

**Part 8**

Jimmy entered the local library. He walked to the desk and asked for the books on religion. The librarian gave him directions and he walked to the right section.

He walked alongside the shelves and every now and then he pulled out a book, flipped it open and browsed through it, only to conclude there was nothing useful in it.

After some time of reading Jimmy gave up. These books didn't provide the answer he was so desperately looking for. Come to think of it, no one could be so stupid to write such information down. He left the library and headed for the church. Father Robert would be his last hope.

Jimmy was lucky. The priest was inside, preparing his preach for the next day.

"Father Robert" Jimmy called desperate and he quickly walked towards him. Father Robert looked up, surprised to see Jimmy.

"Jimmy Novak! We all assumed you were dead" he said shocked.

"Father Robert, I need your help" Jimmy cut to the chase.

"Of course" father Robert replied softly and he lay a hand on Jimmy's back. "Why don't you tell me what's going on, son?"

He led him to the seats and they sat down.

"You'll probably think I'm crazy" Jimmy started uneasy. "But I have something inside of me. It's hurting me and it's making me hurt the people I love. I need to get it out of me"

"Jimmy, if you're asking me to perform an exorcism, I'm afraid I'll have to disappoint you. The chance you live afterwards, is very little. Besides, the church would never permit it" father Robert replied.

"No, I don't need an exorcism" Jimmy quickly said. "I need to know how to summon a demon"

Father Robert face straightened and he slowly stood. "You are joking" he said weak. Jimmy shook his head. "Why would you want to summon a demon? How is that fixing your problem?"

"I can't kill this thing myself. Not without dying myself. But this demon might be able to. He will possess me long enough to kill it and then he'll leave and I'll be free" Jimmy explained, convinced that his plan couldn't fail.

"This is a demon we're talking about. Once he's possessing you, what do you think he's going to do? He will torture you, torment you, and then eventually you will die" father Robert tried to reason with Jimmy.

Jimmy nodded. "I understand" he replied difficult. "I had hoped you would help me, but clearly I was wrong. I'm sorry to have bothered you"

He turned around and marched to the exit.

"That wasn't very nice, was it?" a male voice said behind father Robert. He quickly turned around and saw a man looking at him, with a smug expression on his face.

"How did you get here?" Robert asked reproaching and stunned.

The man smirked and shrugged. "Magic" he whispered and he snapped Robert's neck. He stepped over the body and walked out of the church.

Once outside he easily picked up Jimmy's trail. He was in the park, crying, yelling and cursing God' s name.

"You're wasting your time, Jimmy" the man shouted. Jimmy turned around to see a man walking his way. The man pointed at the sky. "God doesn't listen…But I do" He stopped beside Jimmy. "You've been looking for me, haven't you? I know your situation, Jimmy.

I know how desperate you are and I will gladly help you. Because unlike my father I don't rejoice in people's misery. I don't let them suffer to test their loyalty. You have served my father far too long and you didn't get anything in return. You have only suffered loss. That's going to stop tonight, but there's one thing I need you to do"

"What's that?" Jimmy asked careful.

"If I'm going to kill Castiel, it has to happen from the inside. I can't just possess you. You have to give me permission"

Jimmy nodded.

_No, don't do it! He will kill us both!_, Cas yelled from the inside.

"Jimmy, do you give me permission to use your body as a vessel?"

_No! Jimmy, don't listen to him! He's lying! He doesn't want to help you!_

"Yes" Jimmy answered fierce.

* * *

**Part 9**

The man fell on the grass and a white light left him. With bulging eyes Jimmy saw the light floating towards him. It went inside him and Jimmy was fulfilled with a glowing heat.

He waited expectantly for the demon to kill Cas, but nothing happened.

"What are you waiting for?" he asked disappointed. Suddenly he felt a stinging pain in his heart. He loosened his tie and opened the upper buttons of his shirt.

He grabbed his chest and fell on his knees. He gasped for air, while he felt the life flow out of him. He fell on the grass, next to the other man, twisting and struggling, while he realized he would never see his wife and daughter again.

He breathed out and his eyes closed.

An instant later he stood and wiped his clothes clean. His former vessel started to wake up and he looked up.

"Where am I? How did I get here?" he asked hoarse and confused.

The demon reached out his hand in what appeared to be a helpful gesture. The man down grabbed it and a second later he stood on his feet again.

"Thank you for your hospitality" the demon whispered softly with Cas' voice, before snapping the man's neck.

* * *

**Part 10**

All three turned to Cas, as realization punched them in the face, while Cas slowly started moving again in a spasmodic way.

"Two's a party…" Dean said.

"…three's a crowd" Sam added.

"He's being possessed" Meg finished.

Cas stood and smiled.

"Well, that took you long enough" he said demeaning. "You morons have no idea how much fun I've been having with my little brother" His expression changed and he turned to Dean. "But, Dean…they raped me. You can't possibly understand how fucked up I am, because of that" he acted, before he burst into laughter. "You have to admit I'm good"

He walked towards the trio and stopped in front of Meg.

"I'm not sure which was my favorite part" he said softly. He turned to Dean again. "Forcing you to bang your best friend" he turned to Meg. "Or screwing you"

"Cas knows I was under a spell" Dean replied trembling, hoping Cas was listening. "He knows I would never do that to him"

"Did you hear that, Cassie? Your buddy didn't mean to rape you all over again, so stop sulking already"

In a weak attempt to get the demon out of Cas, Meg grabbed it by its shoulders. The demon pulled Meg closer and forced her to look in his eyes.

"Lucifer" Meg whispered scared.

"Hello, sweetie" Lucifer grinned. "Daddy's home"


	21. Chapter 21

**Chapter 21: The Exorcism **

**Part 1**

Lucifer lifted Meg from the ground and swung her to the other side of the room. He turned to Sam and Dean. "Why don't you two join her?" he suggested. He motioned his hand and Sam and Dean flew in the air and landed next to Meg.

Meg leaned towards Dean and whispered something in his ear. He glanced at Lucifer and nodded in understanding. He grabbed Sam's shoulder and pulled him up. "Run, Sammy" he said dark. They headed for the stairs, while Lucifer watch them go.

He wanted to follow them, when Meg blocked his way and threatened him with the demon knife. "I will drive it through your heart, if I have to"

"No, you won't" Lucifer calmly replied. "You wouldn't want to hurt dear Cassie, would you?"

Meg waved with the knife and cut Lucifer's hand. He didn't flinge, he just conjured that psychopathic smile of him and pushed her aside. He climbed upstairs, slowly, waiting a few seconds after each and every step. He listened carefully and found out their location with ease. He opened Cas and Meg's bedroom and entered. Either Sam nor Dean were anywhere to be found.

"Hey, guys, don't you think you're a little too old to play hide and seek?" he called manipulative as he walked further into the room. "Okay, if you don't want to come out, I know a few games myself. I'm sure Cassie wants to play"

As if on cue, the boys appeared from behind the closet. Lucifer had known they'd been hiding there all along; he just loved to torment them.

"Ah, there you are" Lucifer smiled malicious. "So, who wants to die first?"

"Why don't you start with me?" Meg snapped in the doorway.

"Very well" Lucifer smirked and he marched to her. Or at least he tried to, but an invisible force prevented him from moving forward. He looked up and recognized the Key of Solomon. He looked back at Meg. "Really? Can you say lame?"

"I drew that thing there weeks ago in case a demon ever came into our house" Meg explained self-satisfied. "And now Dean and Sam will send your sorry ass back to Hell"

"Really?" Lucifer said amused and he looked excited at Dean. "Show me what you got, boy"

* * *

**Part 2**

"Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursio infernalis adversarii, omnis legio, omnis congregatio et secta diabolica...

Ergo, draco maledicte et omnis legio diabolica, adjuramus te ... cessa decipere humanas creaturas, eisque æternæ perditionìs venenum propinare...

Vade, satana, inventor et magister omnis fallaciæ, hostis humanæ salutis...

Humiliare sub potenti manu Dei; contremisce et effuge, invocato a nobis sancto et terribili nomine... quem inferi tremunt...

Ab insidiis diaboli, libera nos, Domine.

Ut Ecclesiam tuam secura tibi facias libertate servire, te rogamus, audi nos"

Sam and Dean had used the exorcism spell so many times they knew it by heart. However, nothing happened when they said the incantation. Lucifer gazed at them with a superior glance.

"Houston, we've got a problem" he said mundane.

"Why isn't it working?" Meg asked mad. If that jackass of a devil was going to stay inside Cas much longer, she was going to lose it.

"Wait a second" Dean mumbled and he walked towards Lucifer. He ripped his shirt open and stepped back. "Sam, do these symbols ring any bell to you?"

It was Meg who replied. "I gave Sam one of those tats when I possessed him, so you wouldn't be able to send me back to the pit"

"Well, that explains it" Dean commented dark. He turned back to Lucifer. "We need something to burn them off"

Meg nodded. "I'll be right back"

An instant later she came back with a bottle of hydrochloric acid, a cotton cloth and tape. She tossed the tape at Sam while giving him the order of tying Lucifer's hands.

Lucifer, who had sat down on the chair that was just close enough for him to reach, lay his arms on the arm-rests willingly and simply smiled as Sam tied his hands.

"This looks familiar, doesn't it, Cas?" Lucifer said cheerful.

"Move" Meg ordered rude and Sam gave her some space. She opened the bottle and poured some of its content on the cloth.

"Meg, you do realize that Lucifer won't feel anything, but Cas will?" Sam reminded Meg.

Meg pressed the cloth against Cas' chest. "I know" She withdrew the cloth and saw the first tattoo had successfully burned off. She wanted to repeat the process when she heard a noise coming from Cas' mouth. She looked up and saw a pair of bright blue eyes staring at her, accusatory, begging. She swallowed and then pressed the cloth against the second tattoo, trying to ignore Cas' screams.

"What the hell are you doing?" Dean exclaimed as Meg continued burning the tattoo's off, despite Cas' appeals. "It's Cas. He's with us again"

Meg turned around. "You don't really believe Lucifer's gone, do you? He's trying to manipulate you" she replied furious. She turned back to her work.

Sam walked fierce to Meg and jacked the bottle. He walked behind Cas and stripped off his shirt, his suspicion confirmed that Cas' chest wasn't the only part of his body that needed to be taken care of. He unscrewed the bottle and poured the acid on Cas' naked back.

Meg stopped and looked horrified at Sam.

"Are you out of your mind?" she exclaimed.

"If we keep doing it your way, Cas will be possessed forever" Sam snapped in return. He walked back to the front and wanted to burn away the tattoo's on Cas' chest.

Cas averted his head to Meg. "Make him stop" he begged, tears rolling over his face.

"I can't do this" Dean mumbled and he left the room, after which Sam poured the acid on Cas' chest.

* * *

**Part 3**

Dean held his hands tightly against his ears, but Cas' screeching still found its way in. The door opened and Meg appeared.

"Sam needs you in there. He wants to try again" she said with heavy voice. She walked past him to the bathroom.

Dean entered the room and froze at the sight of Cas' mutilated body.

"Are you with me, Dean?" Sam asked sharp. Dean inhaled deeply through his nose.

"Let's just get it over with" he replied.

"Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica potestas, omnis incursio infernalis adversarii, omnis legio, omnis congregatio et secta diabolica..."

"Cas is never going to forgive you. Do you know that?" Lucifer said manipulative. "You couldn't tell he was possessed, you let him kill dozens of people, you stuck your dick in his ass. Even if you can set him free, he's never going to want to see you again. Your friendship with him is over"

"Don't listen to him, Dean" Sam snarled. "Ergo, draco maledicte et omnis legio diabolica, adjuramus te ... cessa decipere humanas creaturas, eisque æternæ perditionìs venenum propinare..."

"Your mother's with me, Sammy. She has a message for you. She says she wishes you were never born. Then she would still be alive and her and John and Dean would've had a normal life. Dean would've had a normal youth and be married to Lisa" Lucifer continued.

"Vade, satana, inventor et magister omnis fallaciæ, hostis humanæ salutis..."

Lucifer leaned against the chair, deliberately pressing and shoving his back against it, knowing how much agony it would cause Cas.

"Humiliare sub potenti manu Dei; contremisce et effuge, invocato a nobis sancto et terribili nomine... quem inferi tremunt... Dean, I need your help. I can't do this alone!" Sam snapped angry. But Dean seemed unable to speak or move. All he could do was watch Lucifer torture his best friend.

"Ab insidiis diaboli, libera nos, Domine."

"He wanted to kill those people" Lucifer smiled. "He wanted to make them suffer. He just didn't have the balls to do it. So when I possessed him I could feel his anger and his humiliation and so I did the killing for him. He's powerful, because of me. If you exorcise me he'll be a shell of what he used to be"

"Ut Ecclesiam tuam secura tibi facias libertate servire, te rogamus, audi nos" Sam finished, but Lucifer still hadn't gone anywhere.

"You don't honestly think you'll get rid of me that easy"

* * *

**Part 4**

Meg opened the door and carried a basket and a bowl of water inside the room.

"What's that?" Sam asked, with a nod at the basket. Meg didn't answer, but walked straight to Cas. She took his chin and lifted up his head, so she could look in his eyes.

"Cas?" she said softly. Cas blinked slowly and difficult. Why hadn't she been able to tell the difference? She turned her head to the brothers. "We need help. We need someone religious, like a priest"

"Okay" Sam replied. "Come on, Dean, let's go"

But Dean stared at Cas and Meg. He didn't want to leave them alone with each other. He didn't trust Meg. What if she thought killing Cas was the only option left?

"Dean, what are you waiting for?" Sam asked nervous.

"Maybe you should go alone" Dean suggested. "Or maybe Meg can go with you. Then I'll stay here"

Meg stood and walked towards Dean. She pulled out her knife and handed it to Dean. "Here. So you know I'm not going to kill him" she said. Dean accepted the knife and looked strange at Meg. "Cas doesn't have to die. Not if we can find a way to get Lucifer out of him. But we can't do it alone. We need help, so stop wasting Cas' time and go"

Dean hesitated for a few more seconds, but then joined Sam and they left together.

Meg turned back to Cas and reached for the basket. There was a towel which she dabbed in the water. She extorted the towel and pressed it gently against Cas' chest. She felt him shiver.

"Why are you hurting me so much?" Cas asked with a small voice.

"I don't have a choice" Meg replied as she continued nursing him. "We have to get Lucifer out of you"

"There's another way to kill Lucifer" Cas mumbled.

Meg knew what he was talking about and was glad she had given Dean her knife. "No. There isn't"

"Meg, please" Cas begged. "Make it stop"

"You can't ask me to kill you" Meg replied difficult.

"I'm asking you to put an end to my agony. You can't save me" Cas whispered begging.

"No" Meg said as she stood. "Sam and Dean are looking for a priest. He will help us. It'll all be over soon"

* * *

**Part 5**

Sam and Dean parked their car in front of the fifth church they found. The previous four had all been empty. They hoped luck would be on their side for a change.

Dean pushed the door of the church open and looked inside.

"Hello?" he called. When they didn't get a response he cursed. "Have all priests been abducted by aliens or something?"

"I don't know. Maybe Lucifer foresaw our plan and prevented it by killing all priests" Sam replied concerned.

They heard a noise somewhere at the back of the church. The door of the confessional opened and a man in robes came out.

"Father!" Sam exclaimed. The priest frowned and Sam and Dean walked towards him. "We're sorry for bothering you this time of night"

"That's no bother" the priest waved away Sam's apology. "God's doors are always open, regardless day or night"

"We need your help" Sam continued agitated. "Our friend…he's being possessed by the devil"

The candles in the church caught fire.

"Ssshh" the priest hissed. "You can't say things like that in a place like this" Then, in a whisper tone: "The devil, you say?"

"Yes, and we need you to exorcise him. We already tried, but apparently it takes a lot more than a Latin chant to get Lucifer out of someone" Dean replied, not caring if he pissed off God.

Cracks appeared in the ceiling and the walls.

"You have to be careful of what you say" the priest warned again. He took Dean and Sam's sleeves and walked them outside. "Now, we can speak freely. I know what you're going to ask of me. But I can't. I can't perform an exorcism. Even if I wanted to, I'd need permission from the Church. There hasn't been an exorcism in years"

Dean and Sam glanced at each other. They knew better.

"We don't have time for permission" Dean snapped. "Cas is being possessed now and as long as Lucifer's in there he's in pain. So, I don't care how you do it, but you're going to help him. Am I clear?"

The priest took a step back. "There's no place for the homosexuals in God's church"

Dean's mouth dropped open. "What? I'm not…!", but the priest cut him off.

"Alright, then. Your friend needs help. He shouldn't be punished for the immoral crimes of this young man"

"Seriously, I'm not gay!" Dean defended himself.

"Dean, shut up!" Sam snapped in return. "We're so close to saving Cas. Don't let your bruised ego ruin it now"

* * *

**Part 6**

"Is it better yet?" Meg asked careful, knowing better. Some cold water and cream weren't going to help. Cas needed medical attention.

Cas shook his head, trying really hard to keep it together. "No" he said difficult. "I need a doctor"

"We can't take you to a doctor, Cas. Everyone out there is looking for you" Meg explained remorseful.

"Then get Anna here" Cas panted. "She can heal people"

Now that Cas had said it Meg could slap herself. Why hadn't she thought of that herself? She looked at the ceiling and called for the angel.

"Why are you calling me?" Anna asked when she appeared in the room. Meg moved so Anna could see Cas' violated body. "Oh my God" Anna gasped and she ran towards Cas. She kneeled and carefully touch his chest. "What happened?"

"Lucifer" Meg answered.

"Lucifer? How?" Anna asked surprised.

"He's possessing Cas" Meg explained. "We had to take extreme measures to get him out, but all of them failed. Sam and Dean are looking for a priest. Anna, you have to heal him"

"I'll try" Anna replied hesitant.

"What do you mean, you'll try?" Meg snapped.

"I can heal people" Anna started, "But if Cas is possessed, he's not really human. I might need the help from the other angels"

"Then get them" Meg commented obvious.

"I don't think they will" Anna answered sad. "They haven't forgotten what Cas has done. Some of them might think this is justice"

"Well, screw their justice!" Meg cried emotionally. "Cas needs help now, so you get up there and tell them to get the fuck over themselves!"

"You truly love him, don't you?" Anna said, trying to hide the bitterness in her voice, but she could've saved herself the trouble. Meg wasn't listening anymore. "I'll see what I can do" she made an empty promise. She had already decided she wasn't coming back.

* * *

**Part 7**

Dean parked the Impala on the driveway and walked to Cas and Meg's house. Sam helped the priest get out and they followed Dean to the house.

They walked upstairs to Cas and Meg's room. Dean walked in first and swallowed when he saw Cas had gotten even weaker. They were barely on time.

The priest held his steps when he recognized Cas' face.

"What's the problem?" Sam wondered behind the priest.

"That's Castiel Novak" the priest started.

"Yeah" Dean said obvious.

"Though when I first met him, on his wedding day, he went by Emmanuel. He pretended not to know who he was. It all makes perfect sense now. He couldn't reveal his cover" the priest continued. He turned to Sam. "I can't help him"

"What? Why not?" Dean grumbled.

"I'll say it different. I won't help him" the priest clarified, cautiously avoiding the Devil's stare. Lucifer had jerked his head up as soon as he'd sensed the priest' presence. "Zoey and Daphne were good people, until he came in their lives"

"Zoey tried to kill Cas, because she was obsessed with him" Dean hissed furious.

"Zoey was happily married to Gerard and they had a little girl. Why would she give that up? No, Emmanuel or Castiel or whatever his name is, probably tried to abuse and kill her and Zoey defended herself. But it didn't make any difference, because soon after she was killed anyway"

"You're lying" Dean replied cold.

"Am I now?" the priest said and he turned at Lucifer.

Lucifer's eyes grew and he conjured a big smile. "He's telling the truth. When you were dead, poor little Cassie was so upset that he went straight to Zoey. He broke her hand, drove his hand through her stomach and then snapped her neck. Let's face it, she had it coming" He leaned backwards again, knowing how much pain it would cause Cas.

"If your friend is being possessed by the Devil, then it's a punishment from God and I can't interfere" the priest continued.

"By all means" Lucifer threw in. "I don't mind staying in here, until Cassie breaks"

Meg stood and headed to the priest. "If Cas dies, his blood will be on your hands"

For some reason that sentence put some sense into the priest. He pressed his lips and turned to Dean. "I'm going to need a copy of the Bible. And I need all of you to leave the room"

Without a word, Meg ran out the room to get a Bible. She had seen a copy on the closet when she first came here, the night when she had sex for money. She walked to the closet and opened it. She threw out the books until she found a small, thick book. She clenched it as if it was her most valuable possession and speeded back to their bedroom. She handed the book to the priest and signaled for the brothers to follow her outside.

Sam went willingly. The sooner they were out, the sooner the priest could start the exorcism. Dean, however, was a lot more reluctant. The priest had changed his mind a little too sudden. What if instead of killing Lucifer, he was going to kill Cas? Like, two flies in one hit.

"I will not kill him" the priest declared fierce. "It's not in my hands to decide who lives or dies. I will see if I can…postpone this man's inevitable fate any longer"

Sam grabbed Dean's sleeve and dragged him out of the room. As soon as the door shut the priest heard a ripping sound.

"You know what I think is funny?" Lucifer said, while he jerked his hands. "How two losers who claim to be such good hunters, can be so foolish to believe that they can hold me back with some duck tape", he removed the tape off his hands and dropped it on the floor, "and some silly drawing" He stood and walked from under the Key of Solomon.

The priest opened his book and read some verses aloud, while aiming the cross around his neck at Lucifer.

"Maybe that's enough to capture demons or even Crowley, but not me. I'm the fucking Devil, for Satan's sake! I don't get caught so easily" Lucifer continued his words and his steps. When he came face to face with the priest he scoffed at the cross and ripped it off his neck.

He tossed it in a corner, where it broke. He grabbed the priest's hands and pinched them until he dropped the book. Lucifer bowed forward and whispered in his ear: "Do you know what Cas is saying right now? He says thank you. He's thanking me for torturing a body that's not his for a change"

The priest screamed as Lucifer broke both his hands.

Alarmed, Sam and Dean tried to get inside, but the door was stuck.

When they finally got in, both the priest and Cas were lying on the floor, in a puddle of blood.

* * *

**Part 8**

Dean hurried to the seemingly unconscious Cas and turned him over.

"Cas, hey, wake up" he softly said, with a desperate undertone. He wasn't dead. He couldn't be. To Dean's relief Cas opened his eyes with effort.

"Dean?" he whispered hoarse. "Is it over?" he asked, looking at the other two. Dean nodded, grabbed Cas' hand and pulled him up. He embraced Cas as if he was never letting go. Then he felt a sharp pain in his side. He looked shocked at Cas who cast him a big smile.

"Gotcha" he said and he threw Dean against the wall.

"Dean!" Sam exclaimed and ran towards his brother, but Meg only had eyes for Cas, who had jacked the demon knife.

"It's not over" she said defeated.

Lucifer walked towards the mirror and examined his face. "Don't you think Cas' pretty face is in disharmony with the rest of his body?" He turned to Meg. "I think it is. I think some facial decorations are in order"

He placed the knife right under Cas' left eye and drew a thin red line. Meg growled and ran towards him, but with a swing of his hand Lucifer threw her in the air and she landed next to Dean. Lucifer kept carving in Cas' as if he was a rock that had to be worked.

Despite the burning pain in his side, Dean stood.

"Hey!" he yelled and Lucifer rotated his head to him. "You want to torture someone so badly? Take me"

"What?" Lucifer laughed.

"You heard me. Take me" Dean repeated provocative.

"You're willing to sacrifice yourself to eternal agony? Wow, now that's what I call love" Lucifer smirked and he turned to Meg. "You can learn a thing or two from this one, Meg"

"That's not love. That's guilt" Meg scoffed. "Dean has a lot to feel guilty for when it comes to Cas. Don't you, Dean?"

Dean wanted to defend himself, but Lucifer stopped him.

"You know what? It doesn't matter. I'm having way too much fun being a pain in the ass for my little brother. And you know something about being a pain in the ass, don't you, Dean?" he tormented the older Winchester. "You know what? I'll be nice. I'll leave you lot alone for an hour. Then I'll come back to play again. I believe Cas won't make it much longer, so make it count"

A bright white light radiated out of Cas and Cas dropped on the floor.

* * *

**Part 9**

Sam and Dean hurried to Cas and picked him up from the floor. They each threw an arm around their shoulders and carried him to the bed.

"Ehm" Meg started nervous. "Ehm…why don't you guys stay here for half an hour? I'll just wait outside" Without waiting for a reply, Meg walked to the door and left the room, leaving Sam and Dean alone with Cas.

Sam pulled a chair and Dean sank down on the bed. He caressed Cas' cheek and Cas opened his eyes. Dean cast him an affectionate smile, but Cas widened his eyes and sat up, keeping away from Dean.

"Get out" he said shaking.

"What?" Dean asked confused and hurt.

"Leave me alone" Cas continued sharp. He enclosed the knife and held it against his chest, the point aimed at Dean.

"Cas, what are you doing?" Dean hissed confused. Cas looked at him with an expression he only preserved for Lucifer. Fright. "Cas, I didn't mean to do…that, it was the spell. You know I would never hurt you like that"

But Cas closed his eyes and folded his hands. He mumbled a prayer as if then Dean would magically disappear.

"Dean" Sam started careful. "Maybe you should wait outside"

"No" Dean snarled. "I've been given thirty minutes, I'm not leaving any sooner" He grabbed Cas' shoulders, causing the latter to scream. "I'm sorry" Dean startled and he let go of Cas. "Listen to me, Cas, please. In less than an hour Lucifer will wake up and start tormenting you again. I know you're hurting and fighting Lucifer is hard, but you have to try. You have to try to banish him out of your body. Withdraw your permission. Anything. I promise I'll help you through it"

Cas stared ahead of him, trying to release his hand from Dean's grip, but it was too tight.

* * *

**Part 10**

Half an hour passed by where Cas stared at the ceiling and Dean tried to talk to him. The door opened and Meg entered.

"It's my turn" she said difficult. Dean pretended not to hear her and stayed where he was. But Cas had heard Meg's voice and lifted up his head. He cast Dean a begging look and tried to free his hand again. But it was as if their hands were glued on to each other's. Sam grabbed Dean's wrist and separated the two.

"Come on, we'll wait outside" he said and he dragged Dean out of the room.

Meg walked towards the bed and crawled next to Cas. Cas searched for her hand and squeezed it.

"Don't do that again" he said sad.

"I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you so bad" Meg thought he was talking about the acid.

"I mean leaving me with Dean" Cas clarified.

"Dean's your best friend, Cas" Meg said slowly. "He cares for you"

Cas shook his head. "No. Keep him away from me" he begged terrified.

"Ssshh" Meg hushed as if she was talking to a baby. She pulled Cas' head against her breasts and caressed his hair. "You won't ever have to see him again. I promise" she whispered. She lay her hands on his scarred back and Cas cringed.

"I'm sorry" Meg gasped as Cas looked up. She reached for his face and gently touched his scars. She kissed each one of them, while her finger slid over his chest. "I can make you forget about the pain. If you want me to"

Cas lay back down as Meg's fingers slid further down. She opened his belt and started stroking his cock. Cas grabbed the mattress as he moaned from pleasure. Meg leaned forward and pressed her lips against his to mute the sound. Her movements accelerated as did Cas' breathing, until Meg felt something wet and sticky on her hand. She removed her hand and wiped it at the sheets. Then she lay her head on Cas' chest.

"Meg" Cas said, sounding scared to death. Meg lifted her head and saw the terrified gleam in Cas' eyes. "He's waking up. Lucifer's waking up" Meg sat up and stared at Cas, frozen. "Meg, please, he'll just continue torturing me. Don't let it start over" Cas begged. Meg turned around, so Cas wouldn't see her face. Lucifer had promised them an hour. She'd gotten scarcely ten minutes.

"Make it stop, Meg. I don't want to hurt anymore" Cas cried in panic.

Meg stood and walked to the chair where her jacket lay. She conjured the angel sword Anna had given her while she had been waiting outside. She clenched her fingers around the knife and walked hesitantly back toward Cas. She stopped a few inches away from the bed. Cas stood and closed the space between them. He took her armed hand with both hands and moved it upward until it reached his chest.

"Do it" he said afraid, but determined.

Meg swallowed and threw her free arm around his neck. Cas felt tears dripping on his sore skin and Meg bowed to his hear.

"I love you" she whispered, before stabbing Cas' heart. As a white light escaped Cas, he fell on his knees. Meg, holding onto him, fell with him.


	22. Chapter 22

**Chapter 22: The Funeral**

**Part 1**

One week later.

Dean, Sam and Meg were standing around a grave. Cas' grave. After hours of interrogation the three of them had been released, but Cas' corpse had been confiscated until now. There had been an autopsy and of course the police wanted to know where he'd get the burns. Sam, Dean and Meg had agreed on a story about self-defense and once the police had bought it they were free to go.

They heard loud voices and laughter. Sam turned around irritated and saw a gang of young people heading towards them. They had two bottles of booze with them. They stopped at the grave. One of them raised his bottle and spoke loudly: "Here's to Castiel Novak. May his raping, murderous ass rot in Hell forever"

The next moment he lay on the ground. Both Sam and Dean had jumped on him and were working his face with their fists.

One of his friends picked up the bottle and smashed it against Cas' grave. He grabbed Meg and held the broken bottle against her throat.

"Hey!"

Sam turned around and saw the danger Meg was in. "Dean, stop"

But Dean didn't want to stop.

"Let go of him or your friend is dead" Meg's attacker threatened.

"Meg isn't my friend" Dean muttered. "My friend already is dead" But he stopped beating up the guy anyway. He stood and conjured his weapon. He aimed it at Meg's attacker. "Let go of her"

The guy pushed Meg on the ground and joined his friends again. "Now, if I ever see any of you scumbags here again, I'm going to pull the trigger"

The gang quickly walked away.

"You shouldn't have done that" Meg mumbled.

"What? Saving you?" Dean snapped. "Don't flatter yourself. I didn't do it for you. I did it for Cas"

* * *

**Part 2**

Dean and Sam walked away from the grave.

"What I did was for Cas, too" Meg called them back. Dean turned around and headed back to her.

"You killed him" he trembled and he pointed an accusing finger at Meg. "Now you're going to tell me you did that for him? That's bull crap!"

"He was begging me to stop his pain. He was so afraid of Lucifer returning to him. I had to help him" Meg appealed. She wasn't sure why it was so important that Dean understood. She only knew it would be important to Cas.

"Cas was going to fight back and I was going to support him. You didn't even give him a chance. You just wrote him off. Guess he wasn't so attractive anymore with all his scars" Dean replied hostile. "I could've saved him. But you kept me away from him"

"He didn't want you anywhere near him. He was terrified of you. More than Lucifer terrified him, because he trusted you" Meg yelled in defense.

"Why would he be scared of me? I'm not the one who terrorized him" Dean shouted back. People started staring at them, but Dean ignored them. "You knew something was off about him, but you kept it a secret. If your boyfriend hands you a list of people he's going to murder, you call the police, or in this case, us. But you don't go all Bonnie and Clyde with him. If there's anyone to blame for this, it's you" He looked at the grave. "What I said to those morons, applies for you, too. If I ever see you here, you're dead"

* * *

**Part 3**

Meg was standing hesitantly on her front porch. It was the first time she'd come here after Cas' death. It had been sealed until now, so she had been forced to stay with the brothers. Sam had been nice to her, but Dean had constantly shot her angry looks.

"You want me to go inside with you?" Anna offered.

Meg shook her head. "No, I can do this. It's just a house" she convinced herself, but her feet refused obedience.

Anna took Meg's arm and flew them inside. Meg looked around. Nothing had changed. There were Crowley's ashes on the floor and even Cas' vomit.

"I'll clean up the mess" Anna decided.

"No" Meg said quickly. "I'll do it myself" She walked to the depository and took the mop. When she came Anna was still there, much to her discontent. "Can I help you with anything?" she asked rather annoyed. She really wanted to be left alone right now.

"No" Anna replied slowly. "But I think I might be able to help you" she continued mischievous. She walked closer to Meg. "I can make you forget about Cas. I can take away your memories and your feelings, so you can move on"

Meg looked intensely at the angel, giving Anna the idea she was at least considering the idea. But then she slowly shook her head.

"No" she answered fierce. "Cas is the best thing that happened to me in my entire existence. And if I have to feel this pain every day for the rest of my life, then so be it, because it's the only thing I have left of him"

"Alright then. As you wish" Anna commented cold and she left.

* * *

**Part 4**

Dean walked into the cemetery with a bottle of bourbon. He had left Sam, who had fallen asleep on the couch. Dean headed to Cas' grave and though it was the middle of the day he unscrewed the bottle and drank.

"Okay!" he shouted, looking at the sky and spreading his arms widely. ""Whatever son of a bitch is running this show now, better get your Crowley serving ass down here!"

He took another gulp while he waited, but no one came.

"Dean!"

Dean rolled his eyes and drank again. Now Sam was going to ruin it all.

"Dean, what the hell are you doing?" Sam asked when he reached his older brother. Dean glanced at the bottle and conjured a big smile.

"What does it look like I'm doing, Sammy?" he asked sarcastic, with raised eyebrows.

"I don't know, but it seems to me you're about to do something really stupid" Sam replied harsh. Dean shrugged and drank again. Sam tried to swipe the bottle, but Dean took a step back.

"Get your own" he babbled. Sam tried to grab his arm, but Dean pushed him away.

"Dean, come on, let's go" Sam attempted to reason with him.

"No, you go" Dean snapped. "I'm going to stay here and get that demon to show his face"

"Are you talking about Meg?" Sam frowned. Then he realized Dean had said his face, not her. "You want to make a deal to get Cas back"

Dean drank again, not confirming nor denying it.

"Dean, I get that you're hurt, but selling your soul is not the solution. Cas will probably make another deal to save you again. We can't keep going on like this. We have to let him go" Sam talked to his brother. Dean knew Sam was right, but that didn't make it any easier. He took one last gulp and then tossed the bottle in the bushes. "He's coming back" he said convinced. "With or without a deal, he's coming back. I know he will and when he does I'm going to be here. I'm not leaving him again"

* * *

**Part 5**

Sam parked the car in front of their motel. Dean was in no state to drive and even if he was he'd be capable of crashing into a wall. He helped Dean walk to the porch, while he tried to find his key with his free hand.

He could've saved himself the trouble, though. The door opened and Jo appeared. She moved aside and let Sam carry Dean inside. He brought him to the couch and put him down. Dean fell down and closed his eyes.

Sam walked towards Jo.

"Is he going to be okay?" Jo asked with a concerned nod at Dean.

"Physically, sure" Sam replied. "Emotionally, I don't think so. Not without our help"

"I'm really sorry I didn't make it to the funeral" Jo said. "How was it?"

"Short" Sam responded. He didn't tell her about the troublemakers. Instead, he told her what Dean had tried to do. "We need to keep an eye on him, Jo. I'm afraid that if he realizes that he can't bring Cas back, he'll kill himself"

A couple of hours later, Dean woke up. Jo was staring down at him in such way it reminded him of Cas. "Don't do that" he said grumpy and he sat up.

"How are you feeling?" Jo asked compassionate.

"Like my head's going to explode" Dean muttered.

"You know that's not what I mean" Jo returned. "You tried to make a deal with a demon"

Dean stood and walked away.

"Selling your soul won't fix it. If anything, it's only going to make things worse" Jo reasoned while she followed Dean to the kitchen. "I know you want Cas to return, but that doesn't make it okay"

Dean turned around to face her. His eyes were wet. "Of course it's not okay! It's never going to be okay! Cas is dead and he's never coming back and that's my fault!"

Jo and Sam looked at each other confused.

"How is this your fault?" Sam asked.

"I should've never left him alone with that psycho" Dean sobbed. He sat down and buried his head in his hands.

"Dean, you can't pin this on Meg" Sam commented carefully.

"I'm not talking about Meg!" Dean exclaimed while he lifted his head. "I'm talking about Zoey Allen. She's the reason all of this happened. I should've made sure he was really dead, when he walked into the lake. I should've killed Zoey when we were in that building. She fucking deserved it"

"You love him, don't you?" Jo said. Dean looked at her and then at Sam, trying to figure out how he'd react if he'd fess up.

* * *

**Part 6**

"I'm going to pack our bags" Sam decided. "We've stayed in this town for far too long"

"I can call mom and ask her if you can crash at her place for a few days" Jo offered.

Sam nodded in agreement, then he looked at Dean. "I know you want to stay here, to be close to Cas, but I think it's better if we go somewhere where we won't be reminded of all this"

Dean shrugged and stood. He walked to the door and headed to his car. He opened the door and got in at the driver's seat.

"Mom says it's okay" Jo said soft after hanging up. "She'll be happy to see you boys again" She packed Dean's bag and handed it to Sam. "Tell mom I'm not coming home yet"

"Why not?" Sam wondered.

"I'd like to stay here, to take care of Meg" Jo explained careful.

"Meg can take care of herself" Dean snapped from in the doorway. "Are you ready yet? If we have to leave, I'd rather leave now"

Sam carried the bags outside and in the trunk. He stepped in the car at the driver's seat and put the key in the ignition. He pushed the accelerator pedal and drove away, praying they'd never have to return.

* * *

**Part 7**

Meg was sitting at the kitchen table with a glass of red wine when someone rang the bell. She ignored it, but the visitor wouldn't leave. When Meg could no longer pretend she didn't hear the incessant knocking, she stood and staggered to the hallway. She opened the door and gazed at Jo, who had a bag with her.

"Can I come in?" Jo asked and without waiting for an invitation she entered the house and walked past Meg. "I'll take this to the spare room. Don't worry, I'll find it myself" She walked to the stairs and left Meg somewhat stunned.

She checked a few rooms, until she found the guest room. She put her bag on the bed and unpacked, when the door opened and Meg entered.

"What are you doing here?" she asked lifeless.

"Dean and Sam are gone" Jo said, while she hung her clothes in the closet. "I sent them to Texas, to my mom. She owns a café over there now"

"Cool story" Meg commented dry. "Why didn't you go with them? It's your mother"

"I thought someone had to stay here, to make sure you were okay" Jo explained.

"I can take care of myself" Meg replied.

"That's what Dean said" Jo continued. "But I beg to differ. Look, Meg, you just lost your boyfriend. You can't be alright. Just let me help you"

Meg shook her head. She didn't want anyone's help.

"Did you eat anything yet?" Jo asked casual.

"I'm not hungry" Meg mumbled.

"Well, I'm starving" Jo replied. "And I hate eating alone, so I'll just have to persuade you with my cooking skills"

"I said I'm not hungry" Meg repeated fierce. "And I don't need your help nor do I want it"

Jo cast her a smile as she walked past her on her way out.

* * *

**Part 8**

Heaven

Anna walked towards a blonde angel, who stared ahead of her.

"You failed" she said when Anna came standing next to her.

"I asked Meg if she wanted me to wipe her memories of Cas, but she refused" Anna defended herself. "What was I supposed to do? Just take them?"

The blonde angel turned to her. "Yes" she replied cold. "Unfortunately, there's no time for that anymore" she continued, looking back upfront. "We have to prepare. Castiel's body will shortly return to the Heavens where it belongs"

"Did we have to let it get that far?" Anna asked careful.

The blonde angel turned to Anna again and looked at her with a smug expression. "Anna, do I need to remind you of the last time Castiel was a God? Of all the angels and innocent people he killed?" She shook her head. "No" she said fierce, more to herself than to Anna. "We can't let history repeat itself. I won't allow it"

"What are you going to do with him?" Anna asked. "Are you going to lock him away? Are you going to punish him?"

The angel frowned. "What kind of monster do you think I am, Anna?" she asked slightly upset. "We will force him to take responsibility, sure, but when proven remorseful we'll give him back his grace and he can start with a clean slate. As a common angel, nothing less and definitely nothing more. Trust me, it's the best for everyone"

Anna nodded in understanding and obedience.

"I have to go inform the authorities" the blonde angel said, before vanishing.

"I'm sorry, Cas" Anna mumbled sad.

* * *

**Part 9**

After a couple hours of driving Sam got tired. He pulled over and poked Dean to wake him up. Dean sat up and rubbed his eyes. "What?" he mumbled sleepy.

"Your turn to drive" Sam said. He stepped out and walked around the car, while Dean moved to the driver's seat. Sam stepped back in at the passenger seat, but Dean made no movements on starting the car.

"I'm tired, Sammy" he said soft.

"You've been sleeping for the last two hours. How can you be tired?" Sam asked surprised.

"I mean I'm tired" Dean repeated and he turned to Sam. "I'm tired of it all. I'm tired of this job. I'm tired of losing everyone we love"

"Are you saying you want to quit?" Sam asked a little stunned. Dean always went on how it was their calling, that their dad wanted them to save innocent people, that they were meant to be hunters.

"Don't you?" Dean returned. "You never wanted this life. If there was a chance to get back to a normal life, wouldn't you take it?"

"Yeah, I would" Sam admitted. "But I'm not sure if there is, Dean. If we don't hunt these monsters down, no one will and more innocent people will die"

"Why do we have to care about that?" Dean exclaimed angry. "We lost so many people, because of what we do. We lost mom and dad and Bobby. You lost Jess. I lost Cas"

"I lost Cas, too" Sam reminded him.

"Point is that I'm done" Dean continued. "I'm done losing the people I love. I'm done with this job"

That being said Dean turned the key and drove to Texas.

* * *

**Part 10**

Meg opened her eyes and looked around confused. It took her a while to realize she was in the spare room. She got out of bed and walked to the door. When she was outside the room she heard noises from inside her and Cas' room. She walked to it as in trance and opened it.

Jo was putting clothes in boxes.

"What are you doing?" Meg asked slowly.

"Oh" Jo exclaimed surprised and she turned around. "I didn't hear you come in"

"What are you doing?" Meg repeated trembling.

"I'm storing Cas' clothes in boxes. I figured you wouldn't be able to put yourself up to it, so I volunteered" Jo explained.

"No" Meg shook her head.

"Don't worry. It's no problem" Jo reassured her. "I'll just put these in my car and then I'll take them to some second-hand store"

"No!" Meg exclaimed and her voice skipped. She walked quickly to Jo and took Cas' clothes. She walked to the closet and put the clothes back. "Everything has to stay in its right place"

"Meg, I just want to help" Jo said.

Meg turned around and Jo could see her eyes were wet. "Get out" she ordered trembling. When Jo wouldn't move, Meg headed towards her. She grabbed Jo's arm and dragged her to the open door. She pushed her outside and slammed the door. She locked herself in and turned around, leaning against the door. She sunk down on the floor and pulled her fingers through her hair.

"Meg, open the door" Jo kind of begged. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you"

Meg couldn't hear her anymore. The only sound that entered her ears was the sound of her beating and aching heart. This was why she had been furious with Cas for turning them human. She knew she would fall for him. She didn't want to fall in love, because she was afraid she'd get heartbroken, because she knew Cas was the only one capable of breaking her heart. But she had fallen in love with him and now that she had finally admitted it to herself and to Cas, he was snatched away from her.

Anna and Jo and Sam and Dean, they all tried to take away what she had left of Cas. The privilege of visiting his grave. Her memories of him. His personal stuff. Even now they still treated her like an insignificant being.

Meg stood and walked to the closet. She grabbed Cas' clothes and ripped them apart. She felt as if an ice cold hand enclosed her throat and heart. She couldn't breathe.

She no longer had the angel sword, but she walked to the desk and grabbed the scissor. She headed to the bed and stabbed the mattress. She kept stabbing while tears rolled over her face.

She grabbed the chair where Cas/Lucifer has been tied onto and with a cry that cut through flesh and bone she smashed it into the mirror.

"Meg! Let me in! What are you doing?" Jo yelled worried, while banging the door. She desperately tried to open the door, but when she couldn't, she conjured her phone. It was no use calling Sam or Dean. They were too far gone now and frankly Jo wasn't sure if they'd actually care. So Jo dialed the most obvious number of 911.

Meg sunk down on the floor, fragments surrounding her. She picked up a piece and stared at it and suddenly she saw everything clearer. She held the fragment against her heart and breathed deeply. She heard sirens, but the sound was so distant it was as if she had already left this world.

"What happens to you" Meg whispered and she clenched the fragment. "happens to me" She drove the fragment through her heart and fell backwards against the cupboard.


End file.
